December 2003 - cypherpunks-legacy

Jim Bell--Mercetan Visionary / Re: [ZOG] FBI MEMO FROM MSP SPEC OPERATIONS DIV
by nobody＠REPLAY.COM 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

Igor Chudov @ home wrote: > * A reported in the media, the IRS recently > * announced that all IRS District Headquarters Offices will > * be open on selective Saturdays, beginning 11/15/97, to > * handle taxpayer complaints and problem cases. Due to the > * recent publicity surrounding allegations of IRS abuses > * against taxpayers, the offices may attract individuals > * intent on disrupting business or committing violent acts > * against IRS employees. Clueless John Young was mystified as to why Jim Bell's sentencing has been delayed for such a long period of time. You fool! They plan to run him for President as a grass-roots candidate. Glad I could clear that up... Anonymous (Except to John Young, who is cc:'d and will know ~~~~~~~~~ I am TruthMonger)

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Vote for Pat Robertson!
by TruthMonger 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

* Among the recent rules established by the Afghanistan Taliban office formerly known as the Department for Promoting Virtue and Preventing Vice: No paper bags (because the paper possibly could have been recycled from discarded Korans); no kite-flying; no clean-shaven men (unless they are prepared for a career of street- sweeping); no women employed in senior positions in hospitals, or seated in the front seats of ambulances, or riding with foreign citizens; women visiting hospitals must refrain from making noise with their shoes while walking; athletes must grow beards and wear full Islamic dress in the field; and sports-event spectators must not clap. However, the ban on watching television was lifted. ~~~ Send a message to notw-request(a)nine.org with the Subject line of Subscribe. To read these News of the Weird newspaper columns from the past six months, go to http://www.nine.org/notw/notw.html (That site contains no graphics, no photos, no video clips, no audio. Just text. Deal with it.)

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Technology 'secures' gunfire [CNN]
by Jim Choate 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

Forwarded message: > TECHNOLOGY 'SECURES' GUNFIRE IN THE CITY > > Secures October 31, 1997 > Web posted at: 4:44 p.m. EST (2144 GMT) > > ARLINGTON, Virginia (CNN) -- If you heard gunshots ring out in your > neighborhood, you might be able to tell the general direction they > came from. And if you happened to glance at your watch, you could > say about what time. In maybe a minute, if you were so inclined, you > could call the police to report it. > > Now police have an electronic witness that can provide similar > assistance: a device called SECURES that pinpoints the time and > location of gunshots.

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FBI Provides Soft Target List! (WAS: Suitcase packed, and nowhere to go...)
by TruthMonger 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

* Following is the list of the 33 IRS District * Headquarters Offices: * * FROM: FBI NATIONAL SECURITY DIVISION * Pacific Northwest District--Seattle, WA * Northern California District--Oakland, CA. * Central California District--San Jose, CA. * Los Angeles District--Los Angeles, CA. * Southern California District--Laguna Niguel, CA. * Southwest District--Phoenix, AZ * Rocky Mountain District--Denver, CO * Arkansas-Oklahoma District--Oklahoma City, OK * North Texas District--Dallas, TX * South Texas District--Austin, TX * Houston District--Houston, TX * Illinois District--Chicago, IL * Republic of Texas District--Armadillo World Headquarters

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NUKE TIM C. MAY!!!
by William J. Clinton 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

<heh, heh>

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Hi! I'm only twelve years old!
by nobody＠REPLAY.COM 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

Hi. I'm only twelve, but I'm a real dork, and nobody will talk to me in the chat rooms. I was watching 20/20 tonight about sexual predators on the internet and they had some really cool tips about how to prey on young children. {If only one child is raped and murdered by sexual predators who learn how to use the internet effectively, it will be worth the time and trouble for those producing the show.} Anyway, I have a question for you. Would I get more people talking to me on the chat lines if I say that I am a twelve year old interested in sex, or if I say that I am a sexual predator interested in meeting young boys? I have never talked to a real FBI agent before and I know I would get to meet some if I said I am an old fart who wants to bunghole young boys but they would probably tell my parents, wouldn't they? I bet I could get a lot more people to talk to me if I told them how old I really am and that I want to do dirty stuff with old farts. I bet I could get a lot of free stuff, too. What do you think? I am asking you because my Doctor in Forest Hills says you guys know about that stuff. He's not a real doctor, but he meets me in the park, where I can smoke, so I like him. He says I don't have prostrate cancer. Boy is that a relief! I met him in a chat room. He said, "I'm from the cypherpunks, and I'm here to help you." I found out that his name isn't really John Gilmore, it's some kind of foreign name, I think. When I asked him if he was a "real" doctor, he said, "No, but I have an honorary Doctor of Love degree that was bestowed upon me by the grade four class at the Forest Hills pubic school." (I think he was making a joke. :?) I thought I could get people to talk to me on the cypherpunks list, since you guys are cool, but everyone there thinks I am an asshole, too. I think I am going to change my name from TruthMonger to something else. Do you think that would help? I spell pretty good for a twelve year old, don't I? Thanks, A Twelve Year Old Boy p.s. - What is fist fucking? Phillip Hallam-Baker wants my answer by tommorrow.

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Halloween Humor
by Jonathan Wienke 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

A Cypherpunk To Be Named Later purchases a new hunting rifle and moves to Alaska to try it out bear hunting. After a few days of hunting, he sees a moderately decent-sized black bear, and with one perfectly placed shot, kills it. Unfortunately, while watching the black bear collapse, he feels a tap on his shoulder; turning around, he sees a large brown bear. "I saw what you just did," says the bear. "You have two choices. Either I maul you to death, or you and I can step behind that rock over there and engage in the sort of activity Vulis usually attributes to Timmy Mayonnaise." Reluctantly, the Cypherpunk accepts the second alternative. Several days later, when the Cypherpunk is sufficiently recovered to sit comfortably, he decides to avenge his honor. After several hours of stalking, he centers the cross hairs of his riflescope on the brown bear's [deleted] and fires. While watching the brown bear die a slow and agonizing death, he feels a tap on the shoulder. Turning around, the Cypherpunk sees an enormous grizzly bear. "I saw what you just did," says the grizzly. "You have two choices. Either I eat you alive, or you and I can step behind that tree over there and I will show you what New York City Police officers really carry batons for." Reluctantly, the Cypherpunk accepts the second alternative. Several weeks later, after the bleeding stops and his toilet schedule returns to normal, the Cypherpunk once again enters the woods, this time seeking the grizzly bear. After searching for several days he finds the grizzly bear and shoots him. While he is cutting off the grizzly's [deleted], he once again feels a tap on the shoulder. Turning around, he sees a gigantic polar bear. The polar bear looks at him and says, "You don't come out here for the hunting, do you?" Jonathan Wienke PGP Key Fingerprints: 7484 2FB7 7588 ACD1 3A8F 778A 7407 2928 3312 6597 8258 9A9E D9FA 4878 C245 D245 EAA7 0DCC "If ye love wealth greater than liberty, the tranquility of servitude greater than the animating contest for freedom, go home from us in peace. We seek not your counsel, nor your arms. Crouch down and lick the hand that feeds you. May your chains set lightly upon you; and may posterity forget that ye were our countrymen." -- Samuel Adams "Stupidity is the one arena of of human achievement where most people fulfill their potential." -- Jonathan Wienke RSA export-o-matic: print pack"C*",split/\D+/,`echo "16iII*o\U@{$/=$z;[(pop,pop,unpack"H*",<> )]}\EsMsKsN0[lN*1lK[d2%Sa2/d0<X+d*lMLa^*lN%0]dsXx++lMlN/dsM0<J]dsJxp"|dc`

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Re: North CA cops skip preliminaries, get straight to torture
by lcs Mixmaster Remailer 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

>Well, what's wrong with me driving up to the head of the sit-down protest >and saying to the cops standing idly by, "Hey, there are some queers in the >middle of the road, blocking my trip to Marin. If you're just gonna let em >sit there for hours, putting my business and plans at risk, I'm just gonna >gun my engine and drive right over their fairy asses." Tim, I'm surprised at you. The issue isn't whether what they were doing is illegal. The issue isn't whether it would have been justified for you to run over their asses. The issue is government jack-booted thugs walking up, grabbing *non-violent*, *helpless* protesters by the heads and engaging in chemical warfare. I don't agree with the stance of the protesters, and I don't agree with their method of protesting. That does NOT mean that the government is justified in doing the equivelent of beating the shit out of non-violent protesters. Was China justified in running over non-violent protesters with tanks?

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Re: Protocols for Insuran
by Mix 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

-----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE----- nobody(a)replay.com (Anonymous) wrote: >Monty Cantsin wrote: > > The Emergency Room Scenario is a little more challenging. One > > way to deal with it is to wear some obvious signs of wealth like > > a $10,000 watch. In a pinch you can give them the watch. ;-) > > (Some of the nurses won't know what it is, but the doctors will, > > I am sure.) > >Except that very likely you'll be in the Emergency Room in the >first place, because you got shot during the mugging for your watch >-:) Good point. A better play would be expensive looking designer firearms. Not only can you use them for collateral, but they allow the use of certain negotiating strategies with muggers - or doctors. Monty Cantsin Editor in Chief Smile Magazine http://www.neoism.org/squares/smile_index.html http://www.neoism.org/squares/cantsin_10.htm -----BEGIN PGP SIGNATURE----- Version: 2.6.2 iQEVAwUBNFqde5aWtjSmRH/5AQFeMwf7B1dzFvM5GAMD63fGy5O/SJtY3nXnjcGT ZTTGYSLv3Yvg+9AmoqWIGQzYFLJ/d5vTH2ciaCbPcF6iUArLohyATfD+oD+DM+nl m8ketoMhPcliq6xOGPcuYY4E3ZgdrI3TB1xcSJDuPXAHj0xJAr4u40A37Ft2RRaB +YDdMbuI7gTJEMyaxrwSOaeSBio0Tr1MpDgZTv1oHh8p+cn3nbTUFdUN119bPY5+ x6u6EATkNKV9PiD6uS9659gmPJUQlDWg2J/Qwi3Ge7jiCLRIRwNHxI+PLa+GSXVH JP7pt7YuyRWEZg6Gs+x4iFOdBUpsEAqDDOI8tGGRdvMcgOO0p/5VHw== =7Olq -----END PGP SIGNATURE-----

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Re: Killing those who need killing
by Mix 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

-----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE----- Tim May wrote: >Don't any of you get any ideas here, but in California it is >ridiculously easy to get someone committed for a 72-hour observation >period. All one has to do is convince one of the various agencies >that a person is a possible danger to himself or to others.... >...Worst of all, the mere fact of having been committed, regardless >of the eventual outcome, can mean a complete loss of rights to own a >handgun, rifle, or shotgun for a long period (10 years, I >think). Failure to let the Thought Police in for a look around one's >home is almost ipso facto grounds for committment. Use of remailers lessens this and other risks. Monty Cantsin Editor in Chief Smile Magazine http://www.neoism.org/squares/smile_index.html http://www.neoism.org/squares/cantsin_10.htm -----BEGIN PGP SIGNATURE----- Version: 2.6.2 iQEVAwUBNFqgYZaWtjSmRH/5AQHYBwf9HcENXxw+SD3wt3yRFLBmyFHmqNCuQP30 5JdzgfUuwAHBD2D/JkXm3X99vBFcoeouysgCj79yDYdzQeIWHAamO1pdlCcmgcVz 0vBGz7izWgaMioXQAIPU5cBpaEfac5yOleetKQwViq0cnV49aA309qOzi4QzufAD YJuV+hURnfmHPNrOmXRtlbPRzCwogo4pIZu8Vs5klxwSyRL/1G8KLzDERnSE4bFg +0D9MDV9lFmaaqiA2XRYZSEgsFyD3BKc2kgWceugnQl3UtSvLdXncoQPAJbcpE7Y OPIV2YS9S2qNTprtiTiMLV1dsZ+5QeXZoUKEztVRJXwGMYNLMQKqJg== =C2Wi -----END PGP SIGNATURE-----

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