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Payne-Morales vs. NSA: Memorandum Opinion and Order
by bill payne 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

Tuesday 5/5/98 7:17 AM Lawyers and MCs Morales and I met on Monday to discuss strategy for response to Payne-Morales vs. NSA: Memorandum Opinion and Order which is cross-linked at http://www.aci.net/kalliste/ from http://www.jya.com/whp043098.htm We will, of course, file Rule 52. Findings by the Court; Judgment on Partial Findings (a) Effect. In all actions tried upon the facts without a jury or with an advisory jury, the court shall find the facts specially and state separately its conclusions of law thereon, and judgment shall be entered pursuant to Rule 58; and in granting or refusing interlocutory injunctions the court shall similarly set forth the findings of fact and conclusions of law which constitute the grounds of its action. Requests for findings are not necessary for purposes of review. Findings of fact, whether based on oral or documentary evidence, shall not be set aside unless clearly erroneous, and due regard shall be given to the opportunity of the trial court to judge of the credibility of the witnesses. The findings of a master, to the extent that the court adopts them, shall be considered as the findings of the court. It will be sufficient if the findings of fact and conclusions of law are stated orally and recorded in open court following the close of the evidence or appear in an opinion or memorandum of decision filed by the court. Findings of fact and conclusions of law are unnecessary on decisions of motions under Rules 12 or 56 or any other motion except as provided in subdivision (c) of this rule. (b) Amendment. On a party's motion filed no later than 10 days after entry of judgment, the court may amend its findings--or make additional findings--and may amend the judgment accordingly. The motion may accompany a motion for a new trial under Rule 59. When findings of fact are made in actions tried without a jury, the sufficiency of the evidence supporting the findings may be later questioned whether or not in the district court the party raising the question objected to the findings, moved to amend them, or moved for partial findings. motion. Lawyers, we suspect that the possibility that Campos wrote the 56 page document is remote. Reason is that informants within the federal court system have told us that the government lawyers write the opinion and order, then gives them to the judge to sign. Morales and noticed in previous cases that material not presented to judges were appearing in the judges documents. So when we study the document we will be looking for 1 material cited by Campos which Campos did not or should not have in his possession 2 introduction of legal citations not presented to the court by either plaintiffs or defendant. A judge is supposed to judge, not help either side. 3 felony violations of the False Statement Act. We learned from an Hispanic lawyer that government lawyers give false citations of case law to a judge to have the judge agree and dismiss the plaintiff's case. Morales and I still have been unable to obtain docket sheets from the Tenth circuit for cases No. 94-2205, Payne v Sandia and 95-2204, Morales v Sandia. We both won but crooked federal judges gave the win to Sandia. Morales and my main purpose in filing the NSA genocide and deficient crypto algorithm lawsuit was to expose corruption in the US federal court system. A side purpose an international public service to expose technical details of NSAs bungled spy stingS so that congress can take some action to remedy damage done by US intelligence agencies. Albuquerque Journal 4/21/98 page A6 reports what happened. U.S. Aided Communist Foe Pol Pot Richard Reeves LOS ANGELES - ... Even after he fell from national power, we helped supply and protect Pol Pot because the Khmer Rouge was tying down large number of occupying North Vietnamese troops. These are some of the names of the evil who were or still are paid friends: o Saddam Hussein, paid for making war on Iran. o Gulbuddin Hekmatry, who made his name throwing acid in the faces of female students in Kabul who dared to wear western dress, paid for making was against communists in Afghanistan. o The Taliban, the religious warriors we helped train to fight communists who are beating or killing those same women right now in Afghanistan. o Manuel Noriega, the soldier-thug we encouraged to overthrow elections in Panama because we did not like the results. o Mobuto Sese Seko, one Joseph Mobutu, our man in Zaire. o Jonas Savimbi, in constant war in Angola The list goes on. It has for a long time and will, even if communism is dead as a national security threat of the United States. In may of these cases our interest involved resources - oil, usually, ... Settlement should be made QUICKLY Before something possibly VERY UNFORTUNATE happens. Also, I needed legal delivery practice prior to filing a Privacy Act and defamation lawsuit. Let's all hope for settlement. Later bill

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Re: Explaining crypto to people (was Re: A new Swiss banking novel)
by Jean-Francois Avon 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

On Tue, 5 May 1998 01:48:02 -0500 (CDT), Xcott Craver wrote: > Now, I'm not saying analogies are evil, but the analogy > to firearms is a *bad* one, and it stands to give people > the misconception that crypto is many things that it is > not (not to mention including <stigma.h>). I agree on you opinion of the use of analogies, at large. The stigma is real (as in "happening") but it is nevertheless a load of bull since it is the result of the population misconceptions, of being brainwasher by the apostles of political correctness. The quintessential aspects of guns in a free society is that they are Liberty's teeths. Crypto is also the same, only after the teeths have been bashed in... I argued this over the Canadian Firearms Digest list. Ciao jfa Jean-Francois Avon, Pierrefonds(Montreal) QC Canada JFA Technologies, R&D physicists & engineers Instrumentation & control, LabView programming. PGP keys: http://w3.citenet.net/users/jf_avon and: http://bs.mit.edu:8001/pks-toplev.html PGP ID:C58ADD0D:529645E8205A8A5E F87CC86FAEFEF891 PGP ID:5B51964D:152ACCBCD4A481B0 254011193237822C

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Re: Explaining crypto to people (was Re: A new Swiss banking novel)
by Jean-Francois Avon 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

>> ..As will the phrase, "cryptography is like a gun...." Joe User >> won't see authentication as "like a gun" any more than his telephone >> is "like a gun." It is part of the cultural folklore to believe that "The pen is mightier than the sword" Ciao jfa Jean-Francois Avon, Pierrefonds(Montreal) QC Canada JFA Technologies, R&D physicists & engineers Instrumentation & control, LabView programming. PGP keys: http://w3.citenet.net/users/jf_avon and: http://bs.mit.edu:8001/pks-toplev.html PGP ID:C58ADD0D:529645E8205A8A5E F87CC86FAEFEF891 PGP ID:5B51964D:152ACCBCD4A481B0 254011193237822C

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Get Edgy with Extensis PhotoFrame
by listmaster＠extensis.com 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

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Re: The Borg Arrive
by Corvus Corvax 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

Eric Cordian writes: > Beware the Borg. Coming soon to a neighborhood store near you. I was recently asked to produce a drivers license in order to exchange a pair of long johns, paid for in cash. I asked why. "Store policy" was the reply. I asked why it was store policy, and the cashier responded with a hostile stare and exchanged the underwear for me. Along the same lines, try refusing to give your zip code when asked at a register. Evidently some stores now simply cannot process a transaction without it. It's good for a laugh if you're bored. Borged? 571830573294323629934765012348436263285853260687657402192238 Corvus Corvax 324908584730535672342307543875016719214012473014020239437239 ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com

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Re: Explaining crypto to people (was Re: A new Swiss banking novel)
by Jean-Francois Avon 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

On Tue, 5 May 1998 18:28:46 -0500 (CDT), Xcott Craver wrote: >Again, my point. Padlocks and safes are *not* under the gun, > so to speak. People will not see crypto regulation as silly > if they keep getting fed bomb and gun analogies. They'd think > it was damned silly if they got padlock and safe analogies. The analogy of crypto = padlock lack something. A padlock can *always* pried open. A court order can always be issued to open it. So Joe Enforcment will be on it's way with it's crowbars, liquid N2, saws and/or torches and do his duty. It will be no loss of time to him. Strong encryption is different. No matter what Joe Enforcment try, the crypto lock won't give away (well, at least, this is what we assume here). Working on it means just one thing: absolute waste of ressources. AFA Joe Enforcement is concerned, a gun has some of the same potentiality: try to force it and you also risk an absolute waste of ressources. From a human standpoint, it might look different, but if you make abstraction of human life (like most dictators do), some of the effects are similar. Ciao jfa Jean-Francois Avon, Pierrefonds (Montreal), Canada Unregistered Firearms in the hands of honest citizens: Liberty's Teeth Strong Cryptographic tools in the hands of honest citizens: Liberty's Voice PGP keys: http://bs.mit.edu:8001/pks-toplev.html PGP ID:C58ADD0D:529645E8205A8A5E F87CC86FAEFEF891 PGP ID:5B51964D:152ACCBCD4A481B0 254011193237822C

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ANNOUNCE Bay Area Cypherpunks Meeting - May 9, 12-6pm
by Bill Stewart 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

The May Bay Area Cypherpunks Meeting will be Saturday at Temenos, 459 Fulton St. Suite 307, San Francisco. Some planned agenda items include - GSM crack hardware demo - Lucky Green - GSM cryptanalysis details - Ian Goldberg - Anon mailbox servers - Lucky Green - OpenPGP status - hacks in progress The meeting will be at the usual time - mill around at 12, organized part starts at 1, dinner nearby later. 459 Fulton is a few blocks west of Van Ness, probably closest to the Civic Center BART stop. Thanks! Bill Bill Stewart, bill.stewart(a)pobox.com PGP Fingerprint D454 E202 CBC8 40BF 3C85 B884 0ABE 4639

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Pauline Hanson's One Nation May 1998 Newsletter
by Global Web Builders 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

Issue 1.9, May 1998 ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- PLEASE NOTE: No unsolicited email is sent. If you do not want to be on the mailing list please say "REMOVE" in the subject line and return this message in the body. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- Dear One Nation supporter in New South Wales, It is now becoming extremely important that you make your desire to help One Nation in the upcoming Federal election known to your local branch. Your local contact (by email or phone) can be seen at the following URL: http://www.gwb.com.au/onenation/federal/become.htm Please let these key people know how you can help, whether it be by assisting in mail drops or manning polling booths. We need your help! During the last six weeks we have, as a political party, reached many milestones. These milestones, covered on the Internet, include: - One Nation's birthday party at my farm on April 11th See: http://www.gwb.com.au/gwb/news/history/day1.html for coverage and images. - the launch of the One Nation Federal Web site: http://www.gwb.com.au/onenation/federal There have also been a number of press releases on a range of issues. These can be seen at: http://www.gwb.com.au/onenation/press You might not be aware that negotiation on the MAI (multilateral agreement on investment) has been delayed, not stopped. See this URL for my press release on the MAI: http://www.gwb.com.au/onenation/press/010598.html For more information on this secret international treaty, visit: http://www.gwb.com.au/mai.html Finally, we need your financial assistance. We are not going to get the big business million dollar donations like the major parties. We depend on YOU to help us to promote the image and policies of this party at the upcoming Federal election. Please assist if and where you can. There is an on-line donation form at: http://www.gwb.com.au/pledge.html Regards, Pauline Hanson

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Spam
by StanSqncrs 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

Hi cyphers, I'm back. A certain 'nobody' invited me! ;-) Apparently only as far back as 1993, the definition of the word "spam" from the on-line jargon file was this (according to the New Hackers Dictionary) - spam [from the MUD community] vt. To crash a program by over-running a fixed- size buffer with excessively large input data. See also Buffer Overflow, Overrun Screw, Smash the Stack. Obviously that definition has changed since then. I've seen it go from that to repetitive commercial advertising, and I've seen it used to brand someone as an outcast of a list for future removal simply because a small minority didn't like what that person had said (so it was being used at that time to mean 'objectional material'). And in all the times I've seen the word fly, there has never been anykind of volume that would come close to overblowing the forum's mechanical capabilities. So, I'm curious as to who/what dictated the meaning of that to change so drasticly. Write me in private if it's off-subject (and yes, you can write me anonomously if you don't want a response. :-) ) Also, new address for my website - Stan, Stan and the Sequencers http://members.aol.com/StanSqncrs/

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Dog Log - SPACE ALIENS HIDE MY DRUGS!!!
by Toto 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

Dog Log - SPACE ALIENS HIDE MY DRUGS!!! _______________________________________ From: "William H. Geiger III" <whgiii(a)invweb.net> To: Eric Otot <emc(a)wire.insync.net> Cc: cypherpunks(a)cyberpass.net Subject: Re: The Borg Arrive -----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE----- Eric Otot said: >So I have the choice of going somewhere inconvenient to >shop, shopping at Rite Aid and paying full MSRP for every >single item, which hardly any store sells stuff for, or >getting the incentivized mandatory/voluntary barcoded card, >and letting the Borg link me with everything I buy, down >to each and every sheet of toilet paper I use to >wipe my butt with. > >Beware the Borg. Coming soon to a neighborhood store near >you. > >P.S. I went with the card. So lets get this straight: You don't like a companies efforts to gather marketing statistics on its customers but due to your own *sloth* you not only continue to shop there but you also fill out the forms for them to track every purchase that you make! I am sorry but as hard as I try I can not generate the least bit of sympathy for you. Sheeple are sheeple because they act in the manner that you just outlined in your message. Bitch, whine and moan that the store tracks what brand of toilet paper they buy but if in exchange for $0.10 off 4 rolls and they will give up their entire life story. Sheep get sheered because they don't know any better, sheeple get sheered because they deserve it. ------------------------------------------------------------ William H. Geiger III http://users.invweb.net/~whgiii Geiger Consulting Cooking With Warp 4.0 Author of E-Secure - PGP Front End for MR/2 Ice PGP & MR/2 the only way for secure e-mail. OS/2 PGP 5.0 at: http://users.invweb.net/~whgiii/pgp.html ------------------------------------------------------------ Tag-O-Matic: I use OS/2 2.0 and I don't care who knows! -----BEGIN PGP SIGNATURE----- Version: 2.6.3a-sha1 ZZZCharset: cp850 Comment: Registered_User_E-Secure_v1.1b1_ES000000 iQCVAwUBNUp/Ko9Co1n+aLhhAQHRpwP+OVypg6sRgZMAqW6NmaTexoqoRt4z3zxK lhQ6HGvmDMxIGqdS5vPPHw+kZPjtJbkxAWamoi6EtOccbv/3otl2bjuFPNBNMYD+ p7nMAhdZDk1zsgiiUhSzp3ZcREcFIy8Ybnu6u4xYf/wgueg26cW+JE8A5iyeJMOz 6dHT6oBT2IE= =u1mU -----END PGP SIGNATURE----- God bless WillyG III! Eric Otot wrote a reply to WGII's caustic post which gave a perfectly reasonable account of his preference for picking which 'battles' were worth his while to engage in, and which would be merely pissing in the wind of the masses rushing by to save their dime for the GreyHound restroom. I chose to omit EricO's reply and spell-correct WGIII's, in order to preserve the point made by his post, without lessening the post's effect by letting it be obvious that WG3 is an uneducated, redneck, barefoot hillbilly who has no 'manors'... I did so for the simple reason that Eric Otot's perfectly reasonable erudition of his postion on the imposition of identity-tracking techonlogy, although being a perfectly valid justification of the need for concentration of resources, is a position that millions or billions of perfectly reasonable people are capable of reasoning for themselves. Fuck 'reasonable'... Eric Cordian, a much wiser and more perceptive member of the CypherPunks list than Eric Otot, though less easily amused, elucidates one of the many reasons why it may be unreasonable to remain reasonable in one's reasoning in regard to what one must take under consideration when deciding the imortance, or lack thereof, of refusing to submit to the increasing intrusion of technology into our lives in return for what are often marginal benefits. From: Eric Cordian <emc(a)wire.insync.net> Subject: Re: The Borg Arrive To: cypherpunks(a)cyberpass.net Steve Schear writes: > Many of the large grocers in my area have also gone to > 'club' cards as a means of data mining and loyalty > promotion. However, the procedure for joining such clubs > is open loop, in that the cards are issued at the POS > and no check is made of the information your provide. > All of mine are pseudoanonymous. For the time being. However, that could change once all retail outlets are MarkOfTheBeast-Enabled. Infrastructure is infrastructure, after all. --- Eric Michael Cordian 0+ O:.T:.O:. Mathematical Munitions Division "Do What Thou Wilt Shall Be The Whole Of The Law" --- An interesting, widely unknown part of the Club Card equation is that, even if an individual does not 'provide' the vendor with the Mark of the Beast (SSN), those who control the databases involved 'add' MotB/SSN information from widely available 'lookup' sources. As well, the Corporate Beast seems to have learned a few tricks from the Government Beast. Just as the government takes your money as Federal Taxes and then uses it to 'buy' the compromise of your 'State rights' under the guise of matching federal funding, the corporations merely raise their prices and then give the customer a 'rebate' in return for registering for the Yellow Star Club Card. During my recent Soft Target Tour of Tucson, I used my base-player's Safeway Club Card, but I always made a point of going to the adjoining Walgreen's first, to get those things on my list which they sold, before going to Safeway. I cannot recall a single item which I bought at Walgreen's which was not a higher price at Safeway, unless one used the Club Card, whereupon it 'magically' became exactly the same price as the item was at Walgreen's. When shopping for myself, I refuse to play the 'Savings Club' game, for the same reason I don't sell my butt behind the GreyHound Bus Station for a paltry sum of money. Instead, I spend a few more dollars paying the inflated prices, and I leave a few expensive cuts of the store's meat products in a location where they won't be found for a few days. In essence, I pay more as a result of the Sheeple's actions, and they pay more as a result of mine. Tim May, a 34th Generation May Son and a licentious proctologist, has turned his multiple personality affliction into an overall benefit to the quality of his life by singlehandedly creating and maintaining all of the various personas that make up the CypherPunks list subscriber membership, maintaining the list archives, singlehandedly inventing all CypherPunks technologies under his 'Tim May' persona, and keeping his remaining personas in line by referring them to the 'archives' every time the subordinate personas try to take credit for legendary CypherPunk concepts such as 'sliced bread' and the 'wheel'. Despite being the only real subscriber to the CypherPunks list, he manages to not only singlehandedly run all of the Bay Area CypherPunks Physical Meetings, but also to put into practice the MeatSpace manifestations of the concepts he espouses, by methods such as discussed in the following: To: Eric Cordian <emc(a)wire.insync.net>, cypherpunks(a)cyberpass.net From: Tim May <tcmay(a)got.net> Subject: Re: The Borg Arrive At 6:05 PM -0700 5/1/98, Eric Cordian wrote: >A few weeks ago, however, Rite Aid did something which was >not merely mildly annoying, but actually threatening to my >privacy. > >I walked into the store, and noticed that every sale tag >in the store had been embellished with fine print >containing the words "(With your Rite Rewards Card)" Giant >banners proclaimed that this card was free and could be >obtained by simply filling out a little form, available >at any register. This form required your name, address, >apt, state, zip, phone number, and date of birth, and the >card was barcoded. Did you miss the discussion of the Kalifornia Solution? At physical meetings and parties we _exchange member cards_ randomly. A persona hit upon this after I was showing my "Safeway" (a major Kalifornia-based chain in 46 of the 57Semi-Autonomous Republics) and describing how we can execute a Chaumian exchange. As the cards are just cards, with no photo and no obvious I.D. attached, such exchanges are easy. >Beware the Borg. Coming soon to a neighborhood store near you. > >P.S. I went with the card. But of the cards I have, all are filled out illegibly or have been traded multiple times. Identity entropy is an interesting concept. --Tim May "The tree of liberty must be watered periodically with the blood of tyrants...." ---------:---------:---------:---------:---------:---------:---------:---- Timothy C. May | Crypto Anarchy: encryption, digital money, ComSec 3DES: 408-728-0152 | anonymous networks, digital pseudonyms, zero W.A.S.T.E.: Corralitos, CA | knowledge, reputations, information markets, Licensed Ontologist | black markets, collapse of governments. Federal US Marshall Clow, famous as the LEA who finally brought the Blues Brothers to Justice and Ray Charles to Blind Justice, suggests that Identity Entropy Warriors use the addresses of the the secret lairs of the Circle of Eunuchs and the Army of Dog in filling out all forms, so that the UCE/Spams they so dearly love can be forwarded to them after InfoWar has driven them underground. To: Rabid Wombat <wombat(a)mcfeely.bsfs.org>, Martin Minow <minow(a)apple.com> From: Marshall Clow <mclow(a)owl.csusm.edu> Subject: Re: The Borg Arrives Cc: cypherpunks(a)cyberpass.net At 8:45 AM -0700 5/1/98, Rabid Wombat wrote: >On Fri, 1 May 1998, Martin Minow wrote: >> <Eric Cordian <emc(a)wire.insync.net> accepts a loyalty >> card and complains that he has lost his privacy. >> So, do the Cypherpunks thing -- get another card and use >> that sometimes. >> In fact, have all your friends get cards and, whenever >> you get together throw your cards in a pile and take new >> ones away with you > >> ps: did you actually sign your real name? If so, we're >> going to take away your secret decoder ring. > He used his real address. Now they know where to find > his cat ... Try 1060 West Addison; Chicago IL (Wrigley Field) or 70 Brookline Dr.; Boston MA (Fenway Park) -- Marshall Marshall Clow Adobe Systems <mailto:mclow@mailhost2.csusm.edu> "I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." ---Thomas Jefferson Although Marshall Clow ends his post with a grotesquely misquoted statement from Thomas Jefferson--whose original quotations in regard to government invariably contained words such as ratfuckers, cocksuckers, slimeballs, jerkwads, etc.--it nonetheless reflects the type of subterfuge that Jefferson foresaw taking place in the sphere of government, which is today being mirrored in the methodologies of corporations worldwide. The 'federal matching funds' and 'club card savings' scams are but one example of the reasons that an increasing number of citizens, such as Tim May, are finding it necessary to undergo training in proctology, in order to figure out just what the hell governments and corporations are *doing* back there... The preceeding illustrates what individuals and small cells of Army of Dog Warriors can do to throw an element of misdirection into the increasing number of tracking mechanisms being put in place in our daily lives. However, these effect of these types of resistance to the digitalization of humanity are generally far outweighed by the mindless SheepleDom of the masses in allowing themselves to be herded unquestioningly into an endless variety of feeding pens where they are expected to feed on corporate products and, in turn, be fed upon by the government. Of much more effect are the actions of potential Army of Dog Warriors who are in positions which allow them to add misdirection to the digital equation at a level which can throw a Major Screw into the machinery. System Administrators, DataBase Managers, Tech Support personnel, software and hardware Programmers and Developers, are all in a position to enter random numbers into the structured equations designed to monitor and track an increasing number of individual citizens whose lives will be documented in increasing detail in an ever-widening network of corporate and government databases. Tim C. May Owes Me $ .05 As His Share Of The Money That Was Ripped Off From Me By Sun MicroSystems By Selling Me An Operating System Which Was Written By University Students Who Put Comments In The Source Files Which Made Fun Of People Over '30': Tim--I paid Deloite & Touche $ 60,000 to do a Quality Control Analysis on my life, in general, and their report, which is the equivalent of borrowing my watch to tell me what time it is, indicates that the posts you have made to the CypherPunks Disturbed Male LISP since 7 Dec, 1989, are worth $ .03, so as long as you send me your $ .02 worth, we can call it even, and I won't have to launch an assault on Mayonnaise Mountain and put my SPARCard 2 where the Sun MicroSystems don't shine... The Bottom Line, Version 9.9, Revision 0.0: It's my birthday, I'm halfway through a bottle of Glenfiddich, Cask Strength (51% alcohol) Scotch, which is produced in Dufftown (Home of 'Duff Beer', Homer Simpson's drink of choice), Banffshire (Just outside of Calgary, AB), Scotland (An independent Cirle of Eunuchs/Army of Dog Republic often referred to as 'The Texas of the British Empire'). My Dad gave me a birthday call, during which he informed me that his talks with the RCMP revealed that Canadian Customs can hold my computers, etc., up to 90 days before exorcising their option to put their dick up my ass, and then hold it for the fifty years during which the outcome of any further court proceedings are decided. I totally flipped out, screaming all kinds of self- incriminating utterances which prove conclusively that I am a danger to the lives and lifes of decent, Dog- Fearing MeatSpaceIzens everywhere, even though I am fully aware that my electronic communications are being monitored by those who will be 'between a rock and a hard place' when they have to decide whether they should admit to their illegal, surrupticious surveillance of my life, since birth, which would prove that my extreme paranoia validates my 'sanity defense', or to pretend that they are just a loosely-knit organization of semi-competent traffic-ticket writers who have no idea what this silly, paranoid fool is talking about, validating their claim that I should be committed to an internment camp for the Delusionally Politically Incorrect, and that the evidence confirming the reality of the basis of my nonsensical blatherings should be chalked up to 'mere coincidence'. For Professional Mathematicians Only: 1. Estimate the number of times I have 'twitched' in between the time I screamed at my Dad that the RCMP are not the only ones in possession of firearms. 2. Divide this estimate by the number of times I have gotten laid since 1992 (Hint: '0'). 3. Add the number of times that Toto has forged posts to the CypherPunks list, using your name. 4. Subtract the number of ASCII-Art spams sent to the list since July 31, 1999 (Hint: 'The same as answer #2'). 5. Multiply by Franklin's Fudge Factor. 6. Plot Pinkerton's Probability Point. 7. Ask yourself, "How many stops did the train make?" An accurate calculation of the undescribable, inane, indiscrimate insanities enumerated above, will, if divided by the value of Pi legislated by Congress, provide the number of bodies it takes to spell 'Einstein Was Crazy'. While this in no way relates to valid CypherPukes issues such as Craptographics or Piracy, it is essential to the issue of exactly when this chapter of 'SPACE ALIENS HIDE MY DRUGS' ceased to follow the pre-ordained path which the Tao was directing it toward, by way of CensorShip by the Cosmic Muffin, and became a meaningless diatribe during which I tried to disguise the fact that I am jumping up and down, screaming "KILL, KILL, KILL!!!" and putting my head through the walls of my home in an increasingly futile attempt to prevent myself from stepping beyond the boundaries of the social programming provided by the Secret Government Agents Cleverly Disguised As Teachers and emptying the clips of several dozen illegal firearms into the MeatSpace boundaries of a Post Office, a Luby's Cafeteria, and a Schoolhouse Full Of 'Innocent Children Who Would Eventually Murder Their Parents If I Didn't Slaughter Them, Anyway' To Be Named Later. The concept of the Army of Dog assumes that the majority of DogIzens will be sufficiently sane to direct their rEvolutionary thoughts, feelings and actions in a direction which will result in the BioSemiotic Evolution of Humankind moving forward to an increasingly logical and humanistic future. If a few MadDogs such as myself have to be put down by LEA CypherPunks, and a number of Sheeple need to be Nuked by Timothy C. McCypherPunks, then it is a small price to pay for ensuring that SpamFord will be free to compete with Dimitri's ASCII-Art and Fuck(a)Yourself.Up's Trojan Horses for the attention of CypherPunks Disturbed Male LISP Mambo'ers who have remained subscribed to 'cypherpunks-unedited(a)toad.com', in order to document the 'Secret Conspiracy Against The CypherPunks List' that is being perpetrated by the Commie Schill, Ignoramus Chewed-Off, the Awe-Stun-Taxes WebMasturbator, James ChokeTheMonkey, and A Nietzsche Nazi Racing Across The Tundra In A Snowmobile To Be Named Later. When all is said and done, it matters little that the Violent Armed Thugs who comprise the Dudley DoWrong Division of the RCMP are incapable of setting up and railroading an individual who is half as smart as his dog. What matters is that they can shoot his sorry ass, move the body to the nearest Reservation, put a skirt on him, add the body of dead, young Native child with a tube of glue in his hand, and launch an internal investigation by their BumBuddies (TM) that will show them to have followed Proper PoliceMurder Procedure. Now For The 'BAD' News: As you have probably guessed, given the obvious degeneration of this rambling diatribe into an incoherent 'Rage Against The Machine', I have finally sunk into such a depraved condition of violent insanity that any astute judge of the human condition can easily predict that the next chapter of 'SAHMD' will tell The Truth, The Whole Truth, And Nothing But The Truth. Please read it, anyway... If you constantly remind yourself that I am a madman, then you can relegate what I have to reveal to your subconsious, and continue to chop wood and carry water without feeling obligated to join me in an assault on everything that righteous, Dog-Fearing Netizens hold sacred. The Retribution is NOW!

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