December 2003 - cypherpunks-legacy

Diana Moe Hmmm... - SPACE ALIENS HIDE MY DRUGS!!!
by Linda Reed--PCC West Campus CSC 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

Return Of Beyond The Planet Of The Valley Of Diana Moe Hmmm... - SPACE ALIENS, ETC., ETC. ____________________________________________ No doubt there are a variety of self-impressed, elitist CypherPunks who have grown used to my weird capitalization of the word 'cypherpunks', as well as my excess use of commas, and incorrect punctuation, having come to recognize that these things are part of my personal 'writing style' (although few realize that, being too lazy to look up proper spelling, and too ignorant to understand the reasons behind 'correct' punctuation, I am merely cloaking my sloth and stupidity under a croak of eccentric Oriental genius). However, there are undoubtedly a few egoistical self-proclaimed geniuses on the CypherPunks Disturbed Male LISP who have noticed the 'Dina' spelling of the last chapter title being out-of-sync with the 'Diana' spelling of the current chapter title (see above), and mentally ridiuculed me as really being the sorry drunk I keep claiming to be, thinking that I am only dimly aware of the difference between my drunk&ignorant-but-honest typos and literary mistakes, and the typos and mistakes which I quickly recognize to have deep meaning, and are therefore inviolate proofs of my true inner genius, in need of no correction, even if I happen to spot the error. If you noticed the discrepancy mentioned above, and were indeed mentally degrading my literary talent, while considering yourself to be superior to me because of your ability to imitate a robotic computer spell-checking program, you would, in this case, be quite correct in your assumption, since it was really a meaninless mistake, but one I will not bother to rectify, since I am currently both lazy and drunk. However, you smart-ass sons-of-bitches, it would be a serious mistake to fail to realize that my failings in character in no way negate my obvious intellectual superiority over all of the pretentious fools who consider themselves part of an elite group of PseudoMathematicalGeniusAnarchists because of their participation in Legendary LevelWithTheGround InterNet Community MailingList Composed Of Subscribers Who Are Using 11% Of Their Potential BrainPower, and considering themselves to be 'above' the other InterNet Elitists who are using only the 'documented average' 10% of their potential brainpower, and who, in turn, consider themselves to be superior to the AOL'ers who believe that their IQ is somehow related to the speed of their computer's processor (NOT!!!). The short and simple answer to the question, ""So what prompted you to start writing those missives to cypherpunks?" is: "On a mailing list of elitist geniuses using only 11% of their potential brainpower, the person using 12% is King!" Thus I am able to toy with you silly fools, having little fear of someone who uses 13% of their brainpower subscribing to the CypherPunks list, and putting me in my place, since a person capable of using 13% of their brain would likely be above joining the list in the first place... Why I Send My Missives To The CypherPunks List #327: I truly recognize the past, current and future subscribers to InterNet forums/experiences such as the CypherPunks to be the only real hope for a world of VirtualReality to rise above and go beyond the vicious MeatSpaceRealityCycles which are evident throughout millennia of human history. Thus, I feel it incumbent upon myself, as your intellectual superior, to impress upon you what an ignorant, silly asshole I am... ou stupid fucks think I'm being silly, again, don't you? I'm fucking serious!!! While I truly consider myself to be the current epitome of human evolution to this point in time, I would, nonetheless, upon being recognized for my great wisdom and genius and declared King Of The World, issue a press statement advising everyone to kill themselves, since a world under my control would be a scary thing, indeed. As far as the world currently being under the control of murderers and thieves who seem to have a lot of trouble figuring out some of the more rudimentary things in life, such as pulling up their fly upon entering the Offal Office, I really prefer not to think about that, which I am sure can be understood by voters in Boston, Chicago, ad infinitum, who eventually figured out that the slogan, "Vote Early, Vote Often" was not really a part of the original Constitution, as their Ward Bosses had claimed. The Original Peter Principle: Civilization and Human Behavior provide hard evidence that Creatures From The Primordial Swamp who crawled out to become Middle Managers in the Gene Pool did so about a billion years ahead of schedule. The Original Clinton Inaugural Address: "Most of my time, energy and money was spent on women, booze, drugs and gambling--the rest I just wasted, eventually becoming Governor, and then President." The Original Commandment: "Buy a fucking Clue!" I guess that what I am really trying to say is, "As insane as it would be for you to vote for me as the new King Of The World / Ruler Of All That Exists / New World Order Dictator, etc., etc., it would be even more insane for you to *not* vote for me if I was running against the people currently in control of our governments and society. Why I Send My Missives To The CypherPunks List #18: My only hope of being understood when I say, "I may be a stupid fuck, but at least I'm not a stupid fuck." lies in preaching to an audience that has the ability to understand that ogi Berra's statement, "It's DejaVu all over again." was nothing more nor less than A DirectMessageFromGod, designed to serve as the Cole's Notes To Universal Human History From The Beginning Of Time, in a format that would allow us to write it on a slip of paper we could tuck into the elastic of our panties, in preparation for the FinalExam. True Initiates into the Mythical Circle of Eunuchs have long understood that my obsession with peeking up women's skirts is not the result of sexual depravity, but a highly spiritual exercise in recognizing the difference between the masses of Sheeple who truly benefit from the advice to wear clean undergarments, in case they get hit by a bus, and those whose unique, individual spark of life allows them to recognize that they can step beyond society's strict moral programming by not wearing any undergarments at all. Although I am currently up to my ass in drunken alligators, I am still capable of remembering that my original objective was to drain the Scotch... And The Way This Relates To Craptographics Is: What is encryption, if not the epitome of the Anarchy Of Meaning? David Byrne, Largely Suited to serve as the Talking Head who *could* be the originator of the Voice we hear, asking us, "Psycho Killer, Qu'est Que C'est?", if we actually owned a radio, understood that when Bob Dylan sang, "Johnny's in the basement, mixing up the medicine...", it was an oblique reference to Owsley developing a chemical technique to thwart the MindPolice by using LSD to encrypt one's thought processes. The Moody Blues, recognizing that the hippie movement arose in response to Freedom and Privacy being threatened by a GreyHound Restroom Public Key System that could be broken by anyone with a dime, warned us that Timothy Leary, sick, depraved pervert that he was, was 'outside, looking in', alerting us to the fact that 'Free Shit' was nothing more than a corporate advertising ploy by NewAge Gurus who wanted to save the cost of a dime while buggering us, by telling us we may have won 'Free Film For Life.' Phil Zimmerman, Hero Of The TellGovernmentToSitOnItAndRotate Revolution, provided us with the tools we needed to have a genuinely Free Shit in Pretty Good Privacy, enabling us to lock the door while we crapped out our pearls of wisdom, while the anal-retentive government agents on the other side of the restroom-stall door dropped their dime, upon finding out that the cost of peeking up the public's butt had risen exhorbantly, due to those fucking California Hippie Trouble Makers slipping 'acid' in their email. The point that I probably would have made much earlier in this chapter, were it not for the fact that I am a drunken, inconsiderate asshole who fails to realize that *some* people have better things to do than to waste their time wondering where the fuck I get all of these goddamn commas, is this: Anarchy is our only hope... Surely anyone who has been paying attention to life around them could not have failed to realize that if society elects some bum going through the dumpster, to look for lunch, to an official government position that designates him to be the person responsible for removing doggie-doo from the city streets (no salary, but all you can eat...), he soon declares that he needs more money and a larger staff to do his job properly, funds research indicating that dog owners are a threat to Family Values, Apple Pie and the American Flag, presses for Law&Order legislation adding Thirty-Five Dog ears to the sentence of any Monger or Mongrel who is found guilty of 'squatting' in commission of a poop, and calls for the censorship of 'The Doggie Of Anne Frank' because of its graphic descriptions of FIDO crapping in a secret room in the attic, to avoid discovery by the DoggiePoop Gestapo. If you think I'm being a WiseGuy, then think again, because, if memory serves me correctly, this was the lead headline of News Of The Weird last week, even though the original source for the article was on page 4,385 of the New ork Times. The first act of organized religion was to fuck up the Lord's Prayer. Anarchy is our only hope... The first act of organized government was to raise taxes so that they could give themselves a pay raise. Anarchy is our only hope... It is a knee-jerk reaction to bend over to pick up the soap when somebody drops it, but it doesn't matter *who* fucks you, it doesn't matter *how* they fuck you, *when* they fuck you, or *why* they fuck you...the bottom line is this: If you remain silent, ignoring the pain and indignity, listening to the still, small voice of the Tao, you hear the Voice of Eternity echoing from the birth of time to the death of the ten-thousand things, whispering what was shouted by a great ogi, upon realizing that the BigBang was actually a FistFucking KnuckleBall headed Hell Bent For Leather (a California company) toward the Great Void where the sun don't shine...you hear the Tao bend over and whisper, "It's DejaVu, all over again." Anarchy is our only hope... Dr. Seuss Explains Sex To Children During His Prostrate Check: After God created Adam, he took a bone out of Adam's side and created Eve. The first thing Adam did was give Eve another bone-from behind, as he wanted it to be a surprise. If two people exist on the face of the planet, then, as surely as night follows day, one of them is going to get fucked. Anarchy is our only hope... LIFE IN HELL Goes Country: If you can see two assholes on a horse, without lifting its tail, then it is a good bet that they are voting to steal your money and your freedom. Anarchy is our only hope... We live in a world where, in a country in which starving children are dying by the millions, the greatest threat to those who manage to survive a FamineInTheMidstOfPlenty is the ArmySurplusLandmine Company's 'Democracy' model, which is guanteed to blow the limbs off of terrorists and freedom- fighters, men, women and children, without discrimination as to race, creed or color, although the guarantee clearly states that it is not the responsibility of the manufacturer to see that it serves the purpose for which it was originally intended, according the color-glossy brochures distributed by retired armed services officers now making the BigBucks as DC corporate whores. "The Democracy Model Landmine" "Our most popular item, due to the billions of dollars in advertising given to its name through the use of taxpayer money being spent by unelected entities, both within and outside of government circles, was built and designed by highly qualified engineers and technicians to 'Save The Life Of A Single Child.' "As you can see from the pie-charts below, a computer simulation showed that a minimum distribution of a hundred units per square mile is sufficient to save the life of a single child, providing that the child is not so unfortunate as to accidentally step on a landmine." Anarchy is our only hope... [GOVERNMENT REQUIRED NOTIFICATION:] This chapter of 'Space Aliens Hide My Drugs'is a paid advertisement for the Bienfait Nutly News "Anarchy Is Our Only Hope' Christmas Special, available in boxes of individually-wrapped 1's and 0's (in quantities of 8, 16, 32, 64...) The perfect gift for grouchy old farts who still have the box of Pecans you sent them last Christmas, because they put their dentures in their shoes, and they can't find their godamn shoes, and when they asked for help in a post to the CypherPunks list, they got a hundred anonymous emails from assholes telling them to, "Check the archives."

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change of address
by Carl Ellison 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

-----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE----- Hash: SHA1 I am moving from CyberCash. Until I get the new work account set up in a month or so, please replace cme(a)cybercash.com with cme(a)acm.org Thanks, Carl -----BEGIN PGP SIGNATURE----- Version: PGP for Personal Privacy 5.5.3 iQA/AwUBNZhnFJSWoQShp/waEQJYKwCeIDZe9E67VOL2fin2L2unLYJfhCQAnRfL HFncaiI5a/n/rpBAEO2zgavF =pU5t -----END PGP SIGNATURE----- +------------------------------------------------------------------+ |Carl M. Ellison cme(a)acm.org http://www.clark.net/pub/cme | | PGP: 08FF BA05 599B 49D2 23C6 6FFD 36BA D342 | +-Officer, officer, arrest that man. He's whistling a dirty song.--+

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Netcenter News - Volume 8 - July 1998
by netcenter-news＠netscape.com 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

Title: Netscape Netcenter News - July 1998 Welcome to Netcenter Netcenter is dedicated to the proposition that you should be able to find everything you need online in one place. This newsletter is one of the free benefits you receive for registering with a Netcenter program. Employers! Job seekers! Post a job or resume, browse job listings, promote your company, or get career information easily with Netcenter's new Career Center. A beta version of Netscape Communicator 4.5 will be available to the public in early July. This latest version of Communicator will include improvements such as Smart Browsing as well as enhanced messaging and roaming access. A 1998 SPA Codie Award Winner, Netscape Publishing Suite is now just $49.95 ($129.95 value). Get MasterClips 33,000 or Net Accelerator for just $10 with purchase. Netscape respects your online time and Internet privacy. If you would prefer not to receive the monthly Netcenter News, please go to the Netscape section of In-Box Direct and uncheck the Netcenter News item. You may also, click here to send an unsubscribe email or reply to this message with the word unsubscribe in the subject line. Copyright © 1998. Netscape Communications Corporation. All rights reserved. NETSCAPE NETCENTER: YOUR SPRINGBOARD TO THE INTERNET Jump from here. That's the launch-point attitude at Netcenter's new Internet portal. Starting in July, Netcenter will incorporate 16 new business and consumer channels, along with a variety of new services. From downloading software upgrades automatically to sending flowers, Netcenter channels offer immediate access to goods, services, and a wealth of information. Among the new services, Smart Browsing is designed to help you navigate the tricky waters of the Internet. With Internet Keywords, simply type a word such as "Ford" and blast to Ford's site. What's Related displays a list of dynamic links to related sites - great for online research or shopping. Netscape Search & Directory boosts your searches with a complete line-up of search engines in one location. Use My Netscape to design your "home on the web," a personalized home page that displays the information you use every day - news, stock quotes, sports, and more - the moment you log on. WebMail, Netcenter's free email service, allows you to respond to messages automatically and to integrate your organizer's address book with your email. Members can scan incoming attachments for viruses and even be paged when they receive high-priority messages. Netscape Netcenter. Dive in - the water's fine. SmartUpdate is expanding! Netscape has signed agreements with more than 20 leading software companies to make their products available, free of charge, for automatic download via the SmartUpdate service. Netcenter members can SAVE $10 on all software at Netscape Software Depot by software.net. Limited time offer! Join Member Directory and choose your Netcenter member name now - before the Netcenter 2.0 rush. Then, search for friends or new acquaintances. Thanks to everyone who took part in last month's survey about online communities! Here is what 2000 of you told us: In general, newsgroups and instant messaging are more popular than chat. Only 15 percent of you hadn't tried any kind of online community. Of those who do visit communities, 44 percent go daily and 20 percent go several times a day. The thing you like most about your visits is the ability to see what other people are thinking. The most popular forum in Netcenter's Professional Connections is the Product Center. This month's survey is about customizing web pages. We invite you to tell us what you'd like to see in a personalized home page!

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Info on Jim Bell
by cyp＠cyp.dcl.com 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

Jim has been arrested again and he is in the Federal Detention Center at Seattle. Jim wants people to write him at: James Bell #26906086 Federal Detention Center P.O. Box 68976 Seattle WA 98168

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Marketing, Advertising & PR Forum
by Matt Harlow 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

I recently started a mailing list for the marketing, advertising and PR industry. We've already got over 100 subscribers from all over the globe. The conversation is really flowing now and we're ready to expand. So far we've have touched on office politics, how to's, compensation and critiques of national campaigns, job openings and a whole lot more. We'd love to have you on board. All you need to do to sign up is send an email to the address: requests(a)mail.villing.net with the subject of: SUBSCRIBE DIGEST MATT to receive the a daily digest or SUBSCRIBE MATT to receive individual emails Also, please do me a favor and copy me at M_harlow(a)villingandcompany.com if you sign up. That way I know to add your name to the roster. Hope to see you at the forum! We're getting some great exchanges and I'd love to get you in on them. Feel free to pass this message on to anyone you feel might be interested in the group. Sincerely, Matt Harlow P.S. If you're already signed up or if I've recruited you before, Sorry! It's tough to recruit for a project like this and sometimes I get a name twice in my efforts not to miss anyone. Matt Harlow Account Executive Villing and Company 3900 Edison Lakes Parkway, Suite 100 Mishawaka, Indiana 46545 Work: Email: m_harlow(a)villingandcompany.com, Phone: 219-277-0215, Fax: 219-277-5513 Home: Email: mattharlo(a)qtm.net, Phone: 616-683-2599, Fax: 616-684-4765

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PERSONAL NOTICE
by specialnews4u＠usa.net 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

HI. I APOLOGIZE FOR THIS INTRUSION , BUT YOU MAY THANK ME FOR THIS . COULD YOU USE AN EXTRA $ 25,000 NEXT WEEK ? THEN GIVE ME ONE MINUTE OF YOUR TIME... IT MIGHT BE WORTH A MILLION DOLLARS Dear Friend, My name is David Ross and I need YOU. Let me explain I reside in an island paradise . I entertain on a 75 ft. yacht . I travel the world by private lear jet . I drive 8 cars including two Ferraris, a Rolls Royce Corniche and a 1955 gull wing Mercedes worth over a million dollars. I party with supermodels , world famous celebrities and diplomats. Banks are constantly trying to lend me money at prime rates.. but I don't need them any more. However, it wasn't always like this. Until 1995 I was working for the telephone company . I drove a 1989 Chrysler LeBaron and had over $50,000 in revolving debt. It seemed that I would never get ahead and was doomed to be a loser . In my spare time I studied every money making system out there. In fact , I often ordered 10 new money making systems a month. I guess this is one of the main reasons I was so over extended on my credit cards. You could say that my single obsession was investigating profit systems . Then , one day , I was doing research on grants at the library. I accidentally discovered something that all the B.S.money making books never mentioned This simple discovery brought in: $1,876.89 FOR THREE HOURS WORK ! Over the next 5 weeks , I proved to myself that this method worked time after time....EVERY TIME ! Then , at the beginning of the next month, I opened my bank statement. My jaw dropped opened to discover that there was $ 265,832.91 IN MY CHECKING ACCOUNT ! I had discovered a secret program that virtually forced people to give me money ! After a period of 11 incredibly exciting months , I discovered that I had made $ 1,454,742.39 working about three hours per night from home. All without spending a dime on office rent or employees, and while keeping my current job..... which I soon quit after many years ( to hell with the pension and benefits ) . Then I made another exciting break through ! I thought, " WOW.... ANYBODY COULD DO THIS.. IF THEY ONLY KNEW HOW ! " This has lead me to an even faster and easier way to get richer : WORKING WITH PEOPLE JUST LIKE YOU ! I am going to help a few others DO EXACTLY THE SAME THINGS I HAVE DONE ! AND PROFIT RIGHT ALONG WITH YOU FROM YOUR OWN POWERFUL RESULTS ! I've developed a comprehensive , easy to understand PRIVATE REPORT . A complete STEP BY STEP , FOOLPROOF BLUEPRINT FOR YOUR VERY OWN PERSONAL CASH MACHINE THE INSTANT CASH REPORT is just like having a legal printing press to MAKE SERIOUS MONEY ANYTIME YOU WANT ! SIMPLE INSTRUCTIONS WORK FROM HOME , OR ANYWHERE ELSE YOU WANT TO BE. GUARANTEED Are you skeptical ? I understand. So was I ..at first. SO PLEASE ... DON'T TAKE MY WORD FOR IT. SEE FOR YOURSELF TEST IT OUT ABSOLUTELY RISK FREE ! In fact..you WILL be completely convinced that this system WILL make you at least 10,000 times what you paid for the report or I'll send you your money back.. NO QUESTIONS ASKED . EVEN ONE YEAR LATER . GUARANTEED . Frankly, I don't know why anybody would want to waste time .....but I am that confident. Take a full year to TEST THIS SYSTEM and if you're not 100 % SATISFIED during your one year NO RISK TRIAL... I' LL SIMPLY REFUND EVERY PENNY TO YOU. You just can't lose ! SHORT ON START UP CASH ? NOT A PROBLEM ! The administrative cost for personally registering your Instant Cash Report to you is just $ 49.95 And you can put this program to work IMMEDIATELY . Your profits should be rolling in WITHIN DAYS . REMEBER... IF YOU WANT SOMETHING YOU'VE NEVER HAD.. YOU MUST DO SOMETHING YOU'VE NEVER DONE.. AND LETS FACE IT...THE TIME IS NOW . BE AMONG THE FEW TO PROFIT ON THIS AMAZING OPPORTUNITY WHILE IT LASTS I GUARANTEE YOU > The Instant Cash report can be your ticket to A NEW LIFE ..just like it was for me. Obtain the kind of freedom and retirement that you deserve .. Please..forget social security. MAKE IT ALL NOW WORKING FROM HOME JUST A FEW HOURS PER DAY ! But I urge you to act now.. New regulations may soon eliminate this opportunity forever , THEREFORE...TO INSURE MAXIMUM RESULTS FOR MY PARTICIPANTS I AM LIMITING THE DISTRIBUTION OF THE INSTANT CASH REPORT TO THOSE WHO WILL USE IT WISELY AND ARE SERIOUS ABOUT ENDING THEIR FINACIAL CONCERNS .....FOR LIFE ! THIS OFFER WILL BE WITHDRAWN WITHOUT NOTICE. RESPOND TODAY SO NOW ..YOU DECIDE. WHICH DO YOU PREFER ... TO KEEP .WORKING HARD ? .. OR START WORKING SMART ! HERE'S HOW TO GET STARTED WORKING SMART > > Note: You must agree to remit 5 % of your gross revenues from Instant Cash to my company. You nust sign an agreement promising not to divulge its contents to anybody else . Because of the explosive nature of this program, it is necessary to limit distribution . In order to maximize the results for all participants. This offer will soon be discontined without further notice . I urge you to act now . METHOD OF PAYMENT IS BY CHECK DRAFT FACSIMILE ONLY 1. MAKE OUT YOUR CHECK FOR $ 49.95 ( U.S ) TO : ARIEL PUBLISHING GROUP 2. IN THE LOWER LEFT CORNER OF THE CHECK PRINT: INSTANT CASH REPORT ( make sure you sign and date the check ) 3. ATTACH YOUR CHECK TO A FAX COVER PAGE . 4. ON THE FAX COVER PAGE PRINT THE FOLLOWING : ATTENTION DAVID. ROSS DEPT. IC441 PLEASE SEND ME THE INSTANT CASH REPORT. I HEREBY AGREE NOT TO DIVULGE ANY PART OF ITS CONTENTS TO THIRD PARTIES. I ALSO AGREE TO PAY 5 PER CENT OF THE PROFITS FROM INSTANT CASH TO : ROSS ENTERPRISES INC. NEXT.... SIGN YOUR NAME DIRECTLY UNDER THAT STATEMENT. THEN ....CLEARLY PRINT: YOUR NAME , FULL MAILING ADDRESS ,ZIP/POSTAL CODE , YOUR PHONE NUMBER AND E-MAIL ADDRESS ( Sorry, no orders can be processed unless the instructions above are followed exactly Please do not respond to this note via e-mail Due to the actions of anti - commercial e-mail vandals , we do not maintain an e-mail responder ) 4. FAX THIS MATERIAL TO : ( 01 ) 404 - 685 - 0905 ( for best results : dial then press "send" ) SHIPPED BY FIRST CLASS MAIL . Ariel Publishing Group is not affiliated with Ross Enterprises or any other entity. Ariel Publishing Group makes no claim or warranty regarding the content , nature or intended use of this material . Copyright 1998 Ariel Publishing Group Ltd. .

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CTIA Daily News from WOW-COM - June 30, 1998
by CTIA Daily News 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

============================================= Welcome to today's edition of the CTIA Daily News from WOW-COM. Please click on the icon / attachment for the most important news in wireless communications today. =============================================

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Settlement help, please
by bill payne 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

Senators Please help get this mess settled. Thanks bill Tuesday 6/30/98 12:03 PM Mr. Thomas J. Schlageter, Assistant Legal Counsel Advice and External Litigation Division Office of Legal Counsel 1801 L. Street, Northwest, Room 6034 Washington, D.C. 20507 Dear Mr. Schlageter: Purposes of this letter are to 1 seek administrative remedy of a release of false and defaming information on myself which violated Privacy Act. Charles Burtner and Larry Trujillo of the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission's (EEOC) Phoenix District Office unlawfully released the information. 2 Exhaust administrative remedies if we are not able to settle this matter. 3 Request information under the Freedom of Information and Privacy Acts. On June 29 I received at letter from Aletha L. Brown Inspector General U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission POB 18858 Washington, D.C. 20036-8858 202-663-4375 800-849-4230 dated June 25, 1998, OIG Control Number 981770 which said This is to acknowledge receipt for your letter dated May 15, 1998, requesting Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) and Privacy Act information. I apologize for the delay in responding to your request. Your complaint regarding alleged Privacy Act violation and FOIA request was forwarded to the Office of Legal Counsel on May 27, 1998. With regards to these matters, please contact: Mr. Thomas J. Schlageter, Assistant Legal Counsel Advice and External Litigation Division Office of Legal Counsel 1801 L. Street, Northwest, Room 6034 Washington, D,C, 20507 Mr. Payne, the OIG plans no investigative action regarding this matter. Thank you for contacting this office. Sincerely [signature] Aletha L. Brown Inspector General Attachment Attachment reads U.S. EQUAL EMPLOYMENT OPPORTUNITY COMMISSION Washington, D.C 20507 May 27, 1998 MEMORANDUM TO: Mr. Thomas J. Schlageter, Assistant Legal Counsel Advice and External Litigation Division [signature] FROM Joyce T. Willoughby, Counsel Office of the Inspector General SUBJECT: Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) Request of William Payne Attached is a Freedom of Information (FOIA) request from William Payne, which was received by the Office of the Inspector General (OIG) on May 20, 1998. In an effort to respond to this request, attached are copies of the OIG case file concerning Mr. Payne, the Inspector General Act of 1978, as amended, and excerpts from the OIG Investigative Manual and Deskbook. If you have any question concerning this memorandum or need additional information you may contact me at Extension 4397. Attachments While I hope we are able to settle the civil aspects of this unfortunate release of false and defaming information on me, I must anticipate, however, that I will have to seek judicial review. Therefore, under 5 USC 552, the Freedom of Information Act, and 5 USC 552a, the Privacy Act, I request access to copies 1 All documents describing YOUR efforts to properly investigate and settle this unlawful release of false and defaming information about me. 2 All WRITTEN documents, including phone call message notes or another notes, containing the name of William Payne, Bill Payne, etc. made between 3/18/98 and 6/30/98 by your or your staff. If all or any part of this request is denied, please cite the specific exemption(s) which you think justifies your refusal to release the information and inform me of your agency's administrative appeal procedures available to me under the law. I would appreciate your handling this request as quickly as possible, and I look forward to hearing from you within 20 working days, as the law stipulates. This letter resembles one I sent to Ms. Varygas of your office on 6/29. I append the Varyas letter to this letter for your information. Mr. Schlageter, I hope this unfortunate matter can be resolved at the administrative level at EEOC. And I ask your help. Sincerely, William H. Payne 13015 Calle de Sandias NE Albuquerque, NM 87111 505 292 7037 <- I am not reading e-mail Distribution Tom Spellman Aletha L. Brown Senate Judiciary Committee http://www.senate.gov/committee/judiciary.html Republicans Orrin G. Hatch, Utah, Chairman senator_hatch(a)Hatch.senate.gov Strom Thurmond, South Carolina senator(a)thurmond.senate.gov Charles E. Grassley, Iowa chuck_grassley(a)grassley.senate.gov Arlen Specter, Pennsylvania senator_specter(a)specter.senate.gov Fred Thompson, Tennessee senator_thompson(a)thompson.senate.gov Jon Kyl, Arizona info(a)kyl.senate.gov Mike DeWine, Ohio senator_dewine(a)dewine.senate.gov John Ashcroft, Missouri john_ashcroft(a)ashcroft.senate.gov Spencer Abraham, Michigan michigan(a)abraham.senate.gov Jeff Sessions, Alabama Democrats Patrick J. Leahy, Vermont senator_leahy(a)leahy.senate.gov Edward M. Kennedy, Massachusetts senator(a)kennedy.senate.gov Joseph R.Biden, Jr., Delaware senator(a)biden.senate.gov Herb Kohl, Wisconsin senator_kohl(a)kohl.senate.gov Dianne Feinstein, California senator(a)feinstein.senate.gov Russell D. Feingold, Wisconsin russell_feingold(a)feingold.senate.gov Richard Durbin, Illinois dick(a)durbin.senate.gov Robert Torricelli, New Jersey senator(a)torricelli.senate.gov /\/\/\ append ----- Monday 6/29/98 11:59 AM Ms. Ellen J. Varygas, Legal Counsel Office of Legal Counsel 1801 L. Street, Northwest, Room 6002 Washington, DC 20507 (202) 663-4637 Dear Ms. Varygas: Purposes of this letter are to 1 seek administrative remedy of a release of false and defaming information on myself which violated Privacy Act. Charles Burtner and Larry Trujillo of the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission's (EEOC) Phoenix District Office unlawfully released the information. 2 Exhaust administrative remedies if we are not able to settle this matter. 3 Request information under the Freedom of Information and Privacy Acts. Aletha L. Brown Inspector General U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission POB 18858 Washington, D.C. 20036-8858 202-663-4375 800-849-4230 wrote me on May 7 1998 The Office of Inspector General (OIG) is empowered to investigate matters of fraud, waste and abuse which may be attendant to EEOC programs and operations. We do not have programmatic responsibilities and are not involved in the administration and resolution of Privacy Act violations. Based upon our review of the information provided, we have determined that this matter, although important, is outside of OIG's purview and therefore does not warrant any investigative action by this office. In regards to this issue contact: Ms. Ellen J. Varygas, Legal Counsel Office of Legal Counsel 1801 L. Street, Northwest, Room 6002 Washington, DC 20507 (202) 663-4637 Mr. Payne, I hope this information is helpful to you but regret that I can not provide the remedy you seek. Thank you for contacting the Office of the Inspector General. Sincerely, Aletha L. Brown Inspector General June 16, 1998 A Jacy Thurmond, Jr, Assistant Legal Counsel/FOIA sent me some information I requested on possible administrative remedy of the matter under a FOIA/PA request. My request was mailed Friday 5/15/98. While I hope we are able to settle the civil aspects of this unfortunate release of false and defaming information on me, I must anticipate, however, that I will have to seek judicial review. Therefore, under 5 USC 552, the Freedom of Information Act, and 5 USC 552a, the Privacy Act, I request access to copies 1 All documents describing YOUR efforts to properly investigate and settle this unlawful release of false and defaming information about me. 2 All WRITTEN documents, including phone call message notes or another notes, containing the name of William Payne, Bill Payne, etc. made between 3/18/98 and 6/29/98 by your or your staff. If all or any part of this request is denied, please cite the specific exemption(s) which you think justifies your refusal to release the information and inform me of your agency's administrative appeal procedures available to me under the law. I would appreciate your handling this request as quickly as possible, and I look forward to hearing from you within 20 working days, as the law stipulates. Details of the release of information can be found on Internet starting most recently with Payne v. NSA: US on Classified NSA Declaration June 27, 1998 Payne v. NSA: US Motion on FOIA for NSA Algos June 27, 1998 at http://www.jya.com/usa062698.htm Ms Varygas, I hope this unfortunate matter can be resolved at the administrative level at EEOC. And I ask your help. Sincerely, William H. Payne 13015 Calle de Sandias NE Albuquerque, NM 87111 505 292 7037 <- I am not reading e-mail Distribution Tom Spellman Aletha L. Brown Senate Judiciary Committee http://www.senate.gov/committee/judiciary.html Republicans Orrin G. Hatch, Utah, Chairman senator_hatch(a)Hatch.senate.gov Strom Thurmond, South Carolina senator(a)thurmond.senate.gov Charles E. Grassley, Iowa chuck_grassley(a)grassley.senate.gov Arlen Specter, Pennsylvania senator_specter(a)specter.senate.gov Fred Thompson, Tennessee senator_thompson(a)thompson.senate.gov Jon Kyl, Arizona info(a)kyl.senate.gov Mike DeWine, Ohio senator_dewine(a)dewine.senate.gov John Ashcroft, Missouri john_ashcroft(a)ashcroft.senate.gov Spencer Abraham, Michigan michigan(a)abraham.senate.gov Jeff Sessions, Alabama Democrats Patrick J. Leahy, Vermont senator_leahy(a)leahy.senate.gov Edward M. Kennedy, Massachusetts senator(a)kennedy.senate.gov Joseph R.Biden, Jr., Delaware senator(a)biden.senate.gov Herb Kohl, Wisconsin senator_kohl(a)kohl.senate.gov Dianne Feinstein, California senator(a)feinstein.senate.gov Russell D. Feingold, Wisconsin russell_feingold(a)feingold.senate.gov Richard Durbin, Illinois dick(a)durbin.senate.gov Robert Torricelli, New Jersey senator(a)torricelli.senate.gov 6

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NSA and crypto algorithms
by bill payne 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

It is EASY to make mistakes when designing crypto algorithms. SECRECY works against NSA in that their work doesn't get proper evaluation by HOSTILE referees. Like http://www.jya.com/skipjack-bs2.htm NSA does have good experiences at fielding crypto devices. My suprise at gaining access to NSA crypto algorithms was how simple they were.

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Metal Suppliers Online Newsletter
by Alan Gamble 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

June 30, 1998 Metal Suppliers Online (MSO) Summer Newsletter Hello from rainy New Hampshire! Its been a great year here at MSO and I wanted to get this newsletter out to remind you about Metal Suppliers Online (www.suppliersonline.com) and bring you up to date with site improvements. We now have over 12,000 worldwide users (!) . RECENT IMPROVEMENTS INCLUDE: Metal Supplier Data - We continue to grow, with the searchable inventory of 2700 Worldwide Distributors, Producing Mills and Forging Shops. Material Property Data - We now property data on 17,000 ferrous & non-ferrous materials. UP-COMING IMPROVEMENTS INCLUDE: Specification Cross Reference Utilities - Cross reference any ASTM, ASME, AMS, QQ, MIL and selected company specifications. Physical Property Data - CTE, Densities, Conductivity, Resistivity & more. Specification Cross Reference Utilities - Cross reference any ASTM, ASME, AMS, QQ, MIL and selected company specifications. If you haven't been to the site in a while, I invite you to give us a visit. I think that you'll be impressed by the way that we've grown. If you have any recommendations on how to improve our site, please don't hesitate to Email them to me. Thanks for your time. Best Regards, Alan Alan C. Gamble Webmaster Metal Suppliers Online http://www.suppliersonline.com 603-890-6500 - phone 603.890.6222 - fax "We don't stop playing because we get old, we get old because we stop playing"

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Judge Campos letter
by bill payne 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

Tuesday 6/30/98 3:20 PM John Young Nice to talk to you. I see Payne v. NSA: Response to Motion to Remand FOIA June 30, 1998 at http://www.jya.com/whp063098.htm I opened judge Campos' letter at the fax. I handed it to the nice lady. I wrote your fax number on the envelope. Then went to Page One Two to look at used VW repair manuals. Page One Two specializes in used books and CDs. I am REALLY CURIOUS about what Campos wrote. Especially on a Tuesday. But not curious enough to read the letter now. Lawyers always plan to have their hate letters arrive on a weekend or, just before a vacation. Christmas is a lawyer favorite. I ordered a engine rebuild gasket set, rod and main bearings, engine mounts, rings, valve guides and springs, and SPLURGED by ordering an exhuast header this afternoon. My '82 rabbit is about guaranteed to fail emissions test this fall. I ordered today from J C Whitney because the price for the $99.95 header goes up $10 tomorrow. Perhaps headers will even FURTHER improve its exciting 20 second 0-60 performance? I will do the rebuilt in the fall. I phoned a member of Albuquerques underground economy last night. He will do the labor on the head for $60. Cash, of course. I must now ABSOLUTE CERTAINLY complete the digital FX IMMEDIATELY. To make some money. Litigation is more of a long term financial project. Like Morales and I have been working on this project for SIX YEARS. Hopefully this mess will be settled so that I can devote time to another of my specialties. Rebuilding Big Block Ford and VW water cooled engines. And writing MORE books too. Perhaps even write a law book. On pro se litigation. With Morales, of course. But this can be a point for settlement negotiation, of course. Later bill http://www.apcatalog.com/cgi-bin/AP?ISBN=0125475705&LOCATION=US&FORM=FORM2

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Re: Data Processing, Translation, Software & Web Localization Services
by cb0630＠hotmail.com 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

Dear Sir/Madam, We are a professional information services company in Hong Kong providing fast, accurate and inexpensive information services since 1993 with more than 100 supporting staff. Scope of Services: (1) Chinese/English Word Processing Service & Chinese/English Data Preparation Service [Offshore Services Welcome] * 50+ data entry professionals working on a 24-hour shifting scale. * 99.95% accuracy level is guaranteed by our "Double Entry System" * Competitive price to provide you quality results on time and on budget * Rapid Turnaround * Confidential Processing * Year 2000 data conversion / migration * Offshore Service Welcome: Contract out your projects to save 50+% operational cost! (2) English/Chinese Translation Services [Offshore Services Welcome] * 30+ translators with solid experience * Competitive price to provide you quality results on time and on budget. FREE trial and evaluation for first time customers. * Specialize in the translation of - Software localization (User manuals, on-line help systems & user interfaces) - Web site localization - Commercial documents - Technical manuals and specifications - Architectural proposals, etc. The popularity of Internet makes it more easy for you to contract out your most labor intensive jobs in your company to information services companies like us to fully utilize inexpensive workforce in our production centers. You will find that you can concentrate your valuable time and efforts on the most profitable parts of your company. You will then use less labor, less equipment, less office space and less working time to produce more products and services with more profits. Interested parties please fax the following enquiry form to our customer services department for more information. *** Services Reply Slip *** Please fax to (852) 8108 7786 Attn.: Customer Services Department We are interested in your __ Data Processing Service __ Software Localization Service __ Web Site Localization Service __ Chinese Translation Service, please contact us asap. Our project description: ____________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________ Company: _________________________________________ Address:__________________________________________ Tel: ____________________ Fax: ____________________ E-mail: _____________________________________________ Web Site: ___________________________________________ Contact Person: _____________________________________ Post: _______________________________________________ Date: _______________________________________________ PS. This e-mail will only be sent to the same account once (you may receive the same message more than once if you have more than one e-mail accounts). Please keep it for future reference. There is no need to remove your name from our database. Sorry for any inconvenience caused. [CB980630]

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http://bureau42.ml.org
by Linda Reed--PCC West Campus CSC 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

I have been getting a lot of requests from people who want to know how to get more of the manuscripts of the 'True Story of the InterNet' series which is sometimes spammed to the CypherPunks Disturbed Male LISP through my account by some inconsiderate psycho who has no respect for Bob, who asks only that he be given 'space' NOT 'SPACE ALIENS' you stupid fucks!!! try http://bureau42.ml.org Please quit bothering me (except for Attila-I like my sex 'rough', whereas the Author seems toli like hisorher sex 'ruff, ruff'). Linda Lou Reed "If you meet the Author on the road, KILL HIM!!!"

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Anarchy Is Our Only Hope... - SPACE ALIENS HIDE MY DRUGS!!!
by Linda Reed--PCC West Campus CSC 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

~NOTE: If this article is digitally signed, then it is not guaranteed by the Electronic Forgery Foundation to be Genuine FUD. The Electronic Forgery Foundation, as a matter of policy, accepts no responsibility for digitally signed manuscripts which may actually be MainStream News Articles containing factually accurate and officially verifiable lies. Bienfait Nutly News "ANARCH IS OUR ONL HOPE" Christmas Special ***************** by King Author and the Dark&Stormy Knights of the Magic RoundTable [College Station Nudist Colony]IT WAS A STARK NAKED AND COLLEGE dormy night... [Prudential Annex, Alcatraz]JIM BELL STRUGGLED TO HOLD BACK THE small bead of sweat that was beginning to form on his brow as he feigned indifference while the Warden reviewed his application to form a prison swim team... [Oklahoma City]amADbOMBERtObEnAMEDlATER CREPT UNDER THE FENCE surrounding the former site of the Murrah Federal Building. As he placed the explosive charges at strategic points among the rubble, he couldn't shake the feeling that government spin- doctors were already preparing to issue a statement clarifying that BATF agents were absent from the site at the time of the explosion as a result of having moved to new offices, while the innocent children, air-lifted to the sight shortly before the tragic act of terrorism, were part of an educational tour that had been scheduled months previously. He shook off his fears, reminding himself that Louis Freeh, Janet Reno and Michael Fortier had planned everything down to the last detail... [Austin, Texas]THE BARMAID AT THE HEB CENTRAL MARKET CAFE WAS certain that she had seen all of those attending the alleged Austin CypherPunks Physical Meeting in a variety of local theatrical productions over the years. It didn't make sense. Why would someone hire a rag-tag group of actors to impersonate members of an anarchistic, crypto- privacy InterNet mailing list? And who was the strange character from the Bay Area who occassionally attended the meetings? She remembered seeing him at Stanford during the visit of the SexCriminal and his MainSqueeze to convince their daughter, Chelsea, that dating a man who was stalking her father with a Stihl chainsaw could have negative political reprecussions, and that she didn't need that fucking psycho's reassurances as to her sexuality, since daddy also thought she had a great ass, and was not just saying that because she was his daughter. Stanford wasn't the first time she had seen the Bay Area visitor to the CypherPunks meetings. She had also seen him leaving the Texas Book Depository in Dallas, shortly after... Anarchy is our only hope... Lone gunmen and unabombers are Dog's way of telling us, as we stare at a meaningless election ballot, that we could have had a V-8, pretending that we were drinking the blood of a single innocent child we had slaughtered in an act of random violence with an M-16, or in the bombing of TWA-800, or any one of a variety of mind-numbing reminders that we, as well as the cargo on our flight, are just numbers, that can be erased with the stroke of a pen, or a flash of light and a loud bang... Anarchy is our only hope... Face it, the System isn't working... We need to Democratize murder, once again putting it in the hands of the common people. People with wooden or stone clubs; people with Saturday Night Specials; people with knives in kitchen drawers, directly behind the freezer door that their fat, lazy spouse is staring into, wondering which gallon of ice-cream to eat first; people with access to both the drug-cabinet and the maternity ward, who realize that the solution to child-crime is stopping it at its very source... The process of natural selection, which decrees that only the strong AND lucky survive, has been derailed by social and government interference that leads to genocidal policies which mark our fellow humans for deletion on the basis of race, religious and/or ethnic background, political beliefs, ownership of land which has oil or mineral reserves underneath it, use and development of strong crypto, ad infinitum... It used to be that those with strong survival instincts, finding themselves short of funds, could beat up and/or murder a Jew, pulling out their gold fillings in order to make it to their next paycheck. Once government got involved, the average Joe and Jane couldn't hope to compete with the streamlined merger of thousands of ignorant thugs into a single giant bully. It was a step backward for the JesusKillers, as well, since they had a fighting chance against the more ignorant members of the light-skinned races, who didn't realize that it didn't really help for them to hide in dark alleys, as well as members of the dark-skinned races who couldn't resist smiling in the dark when a potential victim approached. Once ethnic discrimination was declared to be a function of government, there was no need for Official Thieves Thugs And Murderers to hide in dark alleys, since they could herd their victims into railway cattle-cars by use of official government brochures promoting Auschwitz as a Health Spa with state of the art shower systems guaranteeing not only hygenic cleansing, but also eugenic cleansing. Those who enquired as to the meaning of 'eugenic cleansing' were told that it would become clear upon their arrival... Anarchy is our only hope... A passage in a work by one of the true literary genius' of the InterNet (whose name I can't remember, but the work was titled, "InfoWar") pointed out a period during which violent crime was rapidly decreasing at the same time that public perception of the rate of violent crime was reaching an all-time high. A parallel poll, commissioned by the People Against Humanity division of the Synics Cociety, revealed that not a single person taking part in the other poll believed themself to be an ignorant, societally programmed moron, incapable of anything beyond sucking up whatever slop MainDream News Farces chose to throw into the public media troughs for consumption by those who believe that the High Cost Of Rational Thought is an unbearable burden that will leave them too poor to add the 24-Hour Drooling And Slobbering Channel to their cable package. Anthropologists specializing in the rise of civilized society have discovered that a solitary recluse living alone in the wild, will, upon drooling and slobbering on HimOrHerSelf, instinctively realize that, if they continue to do so, then the chance of their ever developing the ability to walk upright becomes radically diminished. At the same time, modern research indicates that if test subjects from current society are exposed to pictures of Michael Jordan drooling on his shoes, that manufacturers can add a hundred dollars to the price of their sneakers by adding artificial saliva-stains to them. Anarchy is our only hope... ************************************************************* WE ARE INTERRUPTING THIS PREVIOUSL SCHEDULED BROADCAST TO BEING OU AN IMPORTANT NEWS FLASH The Author, undoubtedly affected by solar flaring reflecting off of the early evening moon, suddenly realized why Leslie Stahl seemed so nervous during last night's '60 Minutes' piece on InterNet FUD, titled, 'The Rumor Mill.' It was not, as he originally suspected, Ms. Stahl psychically picking up on his efforts to peek up her skirt, and was, in fact, not the Scent of a Woman, but the Scent of Fear... Fear that Jane and Joe Sheeple, empowered by InterNet Search Engines capable of catering to their true desires, instead of attempting to mold their desires to fit the hidden agendas of Stahl's CBS controllers, might actually choose to access J. Orlin Grabbe's 'World's 50 Greatest Conspiracies' website, and compare his 'information' with the 'information' provided by '60 Minutes'. Fear that a generation of people who had grown up believing Walter Cronkite when he ended his news casts with "That's the way it is...", would suddenly begin wondering why Wally never told them that Jack Kennedy, their beloved President, was screwing the living shit out of Marilyn Monroe, ending his news cast by making a circle with the forefinger and thumb of his left hand, poking his right index finger back and forth through the circle, and saying, "That's the way it is..." Fear that Marilyn Manson, whining on Public Radio about 'The Rumor Mill' on the InterNet spreading 'lies' and 'disinformation' about HisOrHer tour, would be recognized by those paying attention as being strikingly similar to Ms. Stahl's whining on '60 Minutes' about the 'lies' and 'disinformation' being spread by people who had different beliefs about Reality and Truth than those that she held. Fear that vague hints about "Junk," "Regulation" and "Online Policemen" were not strong enough to truly get her point across, while indulging in violent screaming calling for hanging J. Orlin Grabbe by his hairy balls for disagreeing with her WorldView would only confirm viewer suspicions that she was in the same league, although on a different team, as Marilyn Manson, who believed that some kind of "censorship" was needed, to prevent the ChoirBoys at Ms. Stahl's church from spreading Christian Right lies about HisOrHer tour on the InterNet, while waiting their turn to insert their young, hard, throbbing cocks into a member of the congregation who was a regular correspondent on a major television news magazine show. Fear that the Author, currently working on the development of a forged Leslie Stahl's HomePage, had a 50-50 chance of correctly guessing whether or not she was wearing panties... ************************************************************** WE NOW RETURN OU TO THE REGULARL SCHEDULED BROADCAST ************************************************************** NO WE DONT... ************************************************************** Someone drinking Dirty Mothers wrote the stuff above, last night. Maybe it was me...maybe it wasn't...I woke up with a headache. Regardless, reading today's posts to the CypherPunks list, it soon became apparent that my clever ruse, pretending to be intellectually superior to the other list members, worked! The real purpose of my egoistical diatribe was to ferret out the list members not truly deserving of being on the same list as the rest of us, who are using 11% of our potential brainpower. I knew that the Pretenders to our elitist level of being, being insecure, insecure enough to avoid repeating repeating their words, would accuse *me* of being insecure. Sure enough, the Pretender was exposed, and now we *all* know that the Pretender on the list, whom we are all superior to, is... Nobody! In retrospect, we were fools not to realize it long ago. All of the signs were there... The self-effaceing alias, 'Nobody'. The inability to reflect a CypherPunks Consistent Net Persona. Always posting from different accounts: Juno, Replay, HugeCajones, CypherPunks, Dev.Null... The propensity for taking wildly varying stances on the same issue. Overcompensating for HisOrHer lack of self-worth by always demanding credit for HisOrHer posts, and never posting Anonymously... I was surprised that the rest of the list members never figured it out. I guess I'm smarter than the rest of you... ************************************************************** OK, *NOW* WE RETURN OU TO THE REGULARL SCHEDULED BROADCAST--*REALL*-I *MEAN* IT THIS TIME!!! ************************************************************** ACTUALL, I FORGOT WHAT I WAS TALKING ABOUT, SO I THINK I'LL JUST TR TO EXPLAIN A CONCEPT I WAS THINKING ABOUT ESTERDA, BUT NEGLECTED TO ADDRESS: ANARCH IS OUR ONL HOPE... ************************************************************** Uhhh... I hate to appear to be a fucking idiot, incapable of sustaining a logical train of thought, but I just reached the PointOfEnlightenment that comes around 4 a.m., when one is out of beer and beginning to sober up, and looks at the orange sitting on their desk and sees...an orange! Not the cosmically meaningful macrocosm/microcosm orange that seems to hold the key to the secrets of the universe when one is high on acid. Not the orange with a bit of green-stuff starting to show on its surface when you look at it at the end of another long, hard day at the Salt Mine, whereupon you chastise yourself for letting it go bad before eating it, because your tired, acheing bones remind you that you are living in a cold, hard world. No, it is the orange that both the pragmatist and the mystic see at 4 a.m., about an hour after the last beer is gone, and the liquor store doesn't open for another few hours. The *real* orange... Anyway, 'Anarchy Is Our Only Hope...' is one of those Deep Truths (TM) that are important to attempt to explain to the unenlightened, who quit doing acid in '72, and now have regular jobs. But, Fuck It (TM)! SPACE ALIENS HIDE M DRUGS!!! was always intended to be my autobiography, but somebody else started it (although I'm not complaining, because the FUD generated helped to cover my ass on the original TruthMonger SoftTarget Tour) and I think I have the right to be a little self-indulgent (like it's the first time...right!) and put off finishing the Bienfait Nutly News "ANARCH IS OUR ONL HOPE!" Chrismas Special for a day or so. So I think I'll sink into one of my undermedicated, ill- advised rants about my personal issues, history and problems which only remotely relate to the goals and purposes behind the creation of the CypherPunks list. Unless you have a lot of idle time on your hands, you might just want to go ahead and delete the next chapter of SAHMD, since it will undoubtedly be a semi-coherent, rambling diatribe with little relevance to your life and/or your interests. On the other hand, given my present state of mind, and the fact that I just found a warm beer in the back of my truck, the next chapter may well turn out to be one of those classic works of literature that can only be produced by someone who finds themself in the Desolate Place, an hour after they have finished the LastBeerInTheWholeWorld (like Job), and then is reborn, resurrected, refurbished by the discovery that, not only is there a God AND a Dog, but there is also another beer... Smoke 'em if you got 'em...

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Re: saving the world from a cancerous monopoly (fwd)
by Jim Burnes 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

Jim Choate wrote: > > mjg says: > > > Yes, I've thought of that too. That is the place to start, but I think > > the federal government is too strong -- eventually the states will hit a > > stand-off and the succession issue arises again. Feds won't go down > > without a fight. > > That's actualy an easy one. All it would take is a govenor to declare that > citizens of his state are not going to submit to annual taxation. I > guarantee that things will move quickly. Since the National Guard requires > the ok of the govenor for the feds to invoke that is pretty much a moot > point. It's clearly unconstitutional to involve the Army, especialy if it is > made clear the National Guard will be there at the border to stop them. As > to the FBI and such, have the Sherrif in each county and he state police > proceed to arrest any such persons who attempt to invoke their federal > authority. > Since the National Guard is an extension of the Army and was created through the federal authority of raising armies it is not necessary for the Governor of any state to be consulted before it is given its orders. So says the Supreme Court several years ago. The all happened when Dukakis challenged George Bush's power to mobilize his National Guard during the Persian Gulf war. (operation Just 'Cuz). Dukakis was pissed (thinking he lived in the old US) and challenged the whole thing. He lost. He mistook the state militia for the National Guard. As far as the unconstitutionality of the Army doing anything, thats history -- all they have to do is invoke the Drug laws and the constitution is null and void. In any case, the National Guard is the Army (for all practical purposes). As far as arresting federal authorities goes, there aren't enough sherrifs lying around to stop even FBI agents, much less the National Guard. (state police included) Where were the sheriffs when the BATF broke assuaulted the Branch Davidian church? The answer is: helping them... > > Speaking of brain-washed.... > > They didn't fear democracy, they feared an authoritarian central government > without the states exercising their authority to stop it via the 10th. They > felt that democracy was the only way to deal with this sort of excess. > >In short, they celebrated democracy. Actually they feared an excess of both. Tryanny of the king and tyranny of the masses -- mobocracy. That is why the Senators were appointed by the states and not elected by the people. It was an effort to allow states to control their interests instead of everthing being determined by congress. This is known as a balance of power. jim

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Daily News Wed Jul 1 '98
by STUFFED/EUREKA! 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

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CTIA Daily News from WOW-COM - July 1, 1998
by CTIA Daily News 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

============================================= Welcome to today's edition of the CTIA Daily News from WOW-COM. Please click on the icon / attachment for the most important news in wireless communications today. =============================================

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1998 USENIX Annual Technical Conference - Call for Papers
by Jackson Dodd 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

USENIX 1999 Annual Technical Conference June 7-11, 1999 Monterey Conference Center Monterey, California, USA For the full call for submissions, see http://www.usenix.org/events/usenix99 Papers due: December 2, 1998 Author notification: January 20, 1999 Camera-ready final papers due: April 27, 1999 Registration materials available: March, 1999 The 1999 USENIX Technical Conference Program Committee seeks original and innovative papers about the applications, architecture, implementation, and performance of modern computing systems. As at all USENIX conferences, papers that analyze problem areas and draw important conclusions from practical experience are especially welcome. Some particularly interesting application topics are: Availability Distributed caching and replication Embedded systems Extensible operating systems File systems and storage systems Interoperability of heterogeneous systems Mobile code Mobile computing Multimedia New algorithms and applications Personal digital assistants Quality of service Reliability Security and privacy Ubiquitous computing and messaging Web technologies TUTORIALS We are also accepting proposals for tutorials. USENIX's well-respected tutorial program offers intensive, immediately practical tutorials on topics essential to the use, development, and administration of advanced computing systems. Skilled instructors, who are hands-on experts in their topic areas, present both introductory and advanced tutorials covering topics such as: System and network administration Java and Perl topics High availability, scalability, and reliability Programming tools and program development Portability and interoperability System and network security Client-server application design and development Sendmail, DNS, and other networking issues GUI technologies and builders WWW and CGI technologies Performance monitoring and tuning Freely distributable software INVITED TALKS The Invited Talks coordinators welcome suggestions for topics and requests proposals for particular talks. In your proposal state the main focus, include a brief outline, and be sure to emphasize why your topic is of general interest to our community. Please submit via email to ITusenix(a)usenix.org. For the full call for submissions, see http://www.usenix.org/events/usenix99 ==================================================================== USENIX is the Advanced Computing Systems Association. Since 1975, USENIX has brought together the community of engineers, system administrators, and technicians working on the cutting edge of the computing world. For more information about USENIX: 1. URL: http://www.usenix.org 2. Email to office(a)usenix.org 3. Fax: 510.548.5738 4. Phone: 510.528.8649

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Warning to court clerk
by bill payne 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

Wednesday 7/1/98 2:59 PM John Young I will fax the two sheets from the clerk to you later this afternoon. Morales and I will try to meet on his way home from work to get his signature. http://www.jya.com/sec062998.htm http://www.jya.com/whp063098.htm will likely cause MUCH MORE UNPLEASANTNESS .. for clerks and judges. Let's hope this matter is promptly settled before it gets WORSE. Later bill

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Security Newsletter from Bruce Schneier
by Bruce Schneier 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

I've just started a crypto newsletter: CRYPTO-GRAM is a free monthly email newsletter on cryptography from Bruce Schneier (author of Applied Cryptography, inventor of Blowfish, general crypto pundit and occasional crypto curmudgeon). You can subscribe to CRYPTO-GRAM: on the WWW, at http://www.counterpane.com/crypto-gram.html by sending e-mail to crypto-gram-subscribe(a)chaparraltree.com In the May issue: The Secret Story of Non-Secret Encryption. The story behind the British claim that they invented public-key cryptography first. Advanced Encryption Standard. How the government is replacing DES. In the June issue: Side Channel Attacks. What's the big idea behind the recent press announcements about breaking smart cards by analyzing the power line? Risks of Key Recovery, Key Escrow, etc. Why implementing a FBI-style key recovery scheme will do more to hurt national security than simply letting people communicate. Other regular features include: News. Links to the interesting crypto stories. War Stories. There are security lessons to learn from all over, not just from computer geeks. Resources. Summaries of the good Web resources on privacy, security, and encryption. We understand and respect your right to privacy. You are receiving this email only because you have demonstrated an interest in the areas of privacy, security and encryption. You should also know that we would not sell, rent or share our mailing list should you decide to subscribe. Our goal is to maintain and develop a relationship of integrity and trust with our subscribers. The members of this list are not for sale. Period. If you have any questions, don't hesitate to contact me. Otherwise, I hope you'll take a moment to subscribe to CRYPTO-GRAM at: http://www.counterpane.com/crypto-gram.html or mailto:crypto-gram-subscribe@chaparraltree.com Regards, Bruce ********************************************************************** Bruce Schneier, President, Counterpane Systems Phone: 612-823-1098 101 E Minnehaha Parkway, Minneapolis, MN 55419 Fax: 612-823-1590 http://www.counterpane.com

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Statist Changes - SPACE ALIENS HIDE MY DRUGS!!!
by Linda Reed--PCC West Campus CSC 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

Statist Change - SPACE ALIENS HIDE M DRUGS!!! ______________________________________________ "The more you make change, the more your balance books remain the same." ~ Chevy Change Founder - Saturday Night Live Change Manhatten Bank "Statist Change In The SidePocket - ou Can Bank On It." Delbert McClinton, a paid media informant for a shell of the former Time Bandits, the Nutly Noose, sent me a private email, the contents of which which ethics and propriety forbid me to disclose, although it can be PartyPhrased as, "So why the fuck do you keep sending your goddamn SPAM to the CypherPunks list, you illiterate, drunken asshole?!?!?" The Real (TM) Answer #436-C.2: "Because I'm a CypherPunk, ShitForBrains!!!...!!!" "I don't care what they say about me, as long as they spell my name wrong." ~ Declan McCaulkin Former OldSpiceBoy who recently cut a solo album, "ArmGlue" Declan McCullagh (ever notice that I only get his name right when I'm insulting him?), who used to be an unread, but lightly respected journalist for the Netly News (it is better to remain unread and thought a Tool, than to get a byline and remove all doubt) sold the soles of his shoes to pay the piper, only to discover that his Controllers at Time Magazine, a subsiduary of a fidicuary corporation, Slime, Inc., wholly owned by the MainStream Enquirer (Gyrating Minds Want To Be Snowed) had already paid the 'fiddler', and thus got to NameThatTune, since they were astute enough to realize that the 'original' quote was, "Those who learn from the mistakes of the past, can profitably repeat them." So now Declan, currently only a part-time employee of the CIA/FBI/DEA/NSA (and ASecretThreeLetterOrganizationWhich- SecretlyControlsTheWholeWorldToBeNamedLater) as a result of being fired as a Cuspected CypherPunks Cpy, but rehired on a consultancy basis to be a Shadow of his former self... Damn...lost my train of thought, again. I guess that's why they don't pay me the BigBucks... Anyway, if Declan had been one of the original coconspirators (sometimes spelled with a hyphen) in the Secret Plot Against The CypherPunks List, instead of a JohnnyComeLately trying to jump on the bandwagon, after believing Jim Bell when he told Declan how great prison food is, he would be aware that a chapter of a previous 'True Story Of The InterNet' manuscript pointed out that a member of an elite group of dribblers who wore green bibs with numbers on them, the CelticPunks, Kevin McHale (if that is his *real* name...), said of a fellow CelticPunks member, Danny Angst, "Sure, he's actually a slobberer, but he's *our* slobberer!" This quote was used to illustrate my point that the late Dr. Dimitri Vulis, KOTM, an IgnorantInsaneInconsiderateIgnoble Asshole, was a 'CypherPunks' IgnorantInsaneInconsiderateIgnoble Asshole (TM). PissAnt Dale Thorn was a 'CypherPunks' PissAnt. Cocksucker John Gilmore was a 'CypherPunks Cock Cucker' (not to be confused with the Criminal Cocksucker of Canada). Statist GuberMint Chill, Kent Crispin, was a 'CypherSpooks' Statist DoubleMint Chill, and a secret member of the Circle of Eunuchs. The veteran elitists on the list accused me of being a elitist neophyte who was bitter over not having received a CecretSypherPunksDecoderRing (TM), but none of this really has anything to do with the point I am trying to make... "When Outlaws are outlawed, only Outlaws will be outlaws." ~ An Inlaw of Billy the Kid (aka-BadBillyG, BadBillyC, Bill Frantz, Bill Stewart, William Geiger III, Bill C. May, etc.) (Anyone complaining about the foregoing not making any sense is obviously hanging around with David Byrne because he is rich and famous, and not because they truly love and understand his music.) Why I Am Spamming The CypherPunks List #A-497-2.3: I am the TruthMonger. The dedication of my life to becoming one with the MadDog- InPossessionOfTheLastFalseSmile resulted in my being forcefully unbriscrived from the Jack Nicholson Fan Club Mailing List, because "THE CAN'T *HANDLE* THE TRUTH!" In loneliness and depravation, I decided to sribvive to the Suicide Mailing List, but it turned out to be just a corporate- sponsored pimple on the butt of the InterNet, created as a means to feature the Nike 'Just Do It' logo. (Besides, there was only one other member on Suicide Mailing List, and she only sent a single post, a suicide note, helping me to realize that she had really belonged on the list, while I was just a rubbernecker. I then subscribed to the AIDS Support List, but was kicked off when they discovered that I didn't have AIDS, and was just there to try and meet women. On advice of legal counsel, and Jerry Falwell, I will refrain from describing my experiences on the Christian Pre-Teen Mailing List, since charges are still pending. Why did I subscribe to the CypherPunks Mailing List? It was the last one...I had been kicked off of all the others. I thought that this time, I might be accepted for who I really pretend to be, since I believed that the other list members would be delighted to know that I had 'broken PGP,' although I couldn't provide any proof of it, at the time. Also, I had just completed work on a totally unbreakable encryption system, although I was hesitant to share details with others, in fear that someone might figure out how it worked, thus compromising the total security it provided. When the rest of the list suckbikers attacked me in fits of RayCharlesRage, I realized that they, like myself, suffered from Tourette Syndrome, and were not just pretending to, like Andrew Dice Clay. I suddenly realized that encryption was a science that had come about as a result of hundreds of years of misdiagnosis of Dyslexia and Attention Deficit Disorder (not to be confused with Federal Deficit Disorder, which causes politicians peering into taxpayer pockets to see a Bottomless Pit). I realized that these people were sick motherfuckers... I was home... If ou Can't Kill The List ou Love, Kill The One ou're On: I have never been fond of the CypherPunks Mailing List, or its subscribers. The list and list members are a constant reminder that I am a mental misfit and a social outcast, chased by the torch-bearing angry mob of decent, law-abiding NetiZensComeLately back to the CypherPunks Cecret Castle, cleverly disguised as a Mailing List. It is indeed a great irony that I, a pretentious interloper on the list, was ultimately responsible for single-handedly rescuing the CypherPunks list from death and oblivion. I know what you're thinking: "Drop the crack pipe, and slowly back away from the keyboard..." But it's True (TM), I swear to Dog. I'm not claiming to be some kind of Hero, or to be Dustin Hoffman, or anything, since it came about quite by accident. At the time of the Legendary CypherPunks Censorship Crisis (not to be confused with the CypherPunks Moderation Experiment), I did everything I could to forment dissent, cause fractious fractal fractures between the list members, shooting and pissing at everyone and everything in sight, even myself, suffering several serious foot-wounds in the process. It was only later, when it became obvious that the CypherPunks list was going to survive, and prosper, and that, in fact, a beautiful Toad had been transformed, by the KissOfDeath, into a plethora of ugly PrincesAndPrincesses, that I realized that the CypherPunks Censorship Crisis had been an attempt to destroy the list, by making it just another bland, everyday imitation of PoliticallyCorrectMasturbation that would make our mothers proud of us, as long as we didn't stain the sheets too badly. In retrospect I realized that I had inadvertently saved the list from a Zombie-like future as just another sidestreet on the Information Highway by using my posts to promote and glorify violent anarchy against reason, common sense, and everything that my mother and father taught me in the hope of saving me from being a bad influence on myself, little realizing that I was actually epitomizing what the CypherPunks Disturbed Male LISP was really about. I realize that I am enclosing myself in an aura of grandoise self-importance once again, since most of the list subscribers fell into the same knee-jerk reactions as I did, even the ones who were calling the loudest for censorship, but doing so by shitting and pissing on the OfficiallyPerceivedTroubleMakers on the list, so, in actual fact, one might surmise that the CypherPunks Mailing List was not so much 'saved' by anyone, as merely confirming itself to be an IndestructibleEntity that would survive as long as their was a single individual on the face of the earth who continued to respond to a perfectly reasonable and valid statement with, "Oh yeah? Sez who?", or a pair of bickering children screaming, "Did so!/Did not!/Did so!/Did not!" Still, I think I deserve a CypherPunksSecretDecoderRing... "Question Anonymity!" ~ Janet Renal Department of Blow Jobs "Why not? Are you 'gay', or something?" [I am going to take a BeerBreak, and give you a chance to check the archives, in order to confirm that the next chapter of SAHMD, which deals with the concepts underlying the formation of the Army of Dog, was first mentioned on the CypherPunks list by Tim C. May, who really did invent everything, including the Wheel (doing it in his sleep), making the rest of us just dirt under his CypherPunks Elitist Feet (TM).]

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THE BEST ADULT WEBMASTER PRODUCTS
by 8tIBa9867＠thegrid.net 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

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Email 57 Million People for $99
by aqwsc1a＠cpckor.com.tw 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

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IE Frees Crypto
by John Young 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

Source: http://go2.guardian.co.uk/paper.html Thanks to IB The Guardian Online, Microfile, July 2, 1998 ANNOUNCING the most liberal national policy yet on the encoding of data sent over the Internet, the Irish government last week showed it has every intention of being an international centre for electronic commerce. Ireland listened to its many resident technology companies, rather than bowing to pressure from the US, which wants access to encrypted messages. Ireland places no restrictions on the use, import or export of encryption products. Individuals can choose to offer a plain text version of the encrypted document or hand over a key, if a search warrant is proffered. The document was released to coincide with the Irish visit of President Clintons Internet tsar, senior trade advisor Ira Magaziner, who hinted that his views on encryption diverge from those of his boss. "Within the next year, therell be such an availability of high-level encryption that the market will take over," he said. ----- Leads on getting this paper would be appreciated.

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NYT Hits GAK, Boosts GAKS
by John Young 17 Dec '03

17 Dec '03

The New York Times, July 6, 1998, p. A10. Editorial Privacy in the Digital Age As more and more Americans communicate and do business electronically, the fear is spreading that information they transmit can be seized by hackers or criminals and used for illegal or unsavory purposes. Fortunately, the technology to thwart such invasions already exists. It is called encryption, or the encoding of digital information to secure its privacy. But the Federal Bureau of Investigation is trying hard to prevent the growing use of encryption, both in the United States and abroad, because of fears that the protective technology itself will get into the wrong hands. That shortsighted stand will undermine efforts to protect commercial transactions and may actually hamper law enforcement rather than help it. The Clinton Administration's current policies toward encryption have been largely dictated by the F.B.I. and the Justice Department. These two agencies now block encryption makers from exporting their most advanced technology unless they agree to develop a method allowing law enforcement agencies to gain access to it. The method favored by the F.B.I. is known as the key escrow, in which the key to cracking a code is kept with a third party that could hand it over quickly if law enforcement agencies demanded it. But the key escrow method poses tremendous threats to privacy. There is a danger that access to keys for the code could be abused by law enforcement agencies and others. Worse, the United States would be required to share key escrow information with law enforcement agencies of other countries, and giving access to private communications to countries with poor human rights records could lead to crackdowns on dissidents using encryption for their own communications. According to industry officials, the export controls are already backfiring. More and more foreign companies are supplying encryption technologies without key escrow arrangements, making it virtually impossible for the F.B.I. to eavesdrop and stealing business from American firms. The growing foreign role diminishes the ability of the F.B.I. to demand new safeguards or ways to penetrate the communications of criminals who use encryption. President Clinton might normally be more sympathetic to concerns over maintaining privacy in the digital world. But since Attorney General Janet Reno has protected Mr. Clinton from an independent counsel on campaign finance, the White House is said to be loath to oppose either her or Louis Freeh, the F.B.I. Director, on this issue. On Capitol Hill, the debate over encryption has created some unusual political alliances. Many conservative Republicans have stood with leaders of the high-tech industry to oppose any kind of ban on encryption within the United States and to support a loosening of export controls on encryption technology. It has been odd to see Trent Lott, the Senate majority leader, and Dick Armey, the House majority leader, stand with civil libertarians against the demands of the F.B.I. But the F.B.I. is not without influence. House Speaker Newt Gingrich, more friendly to the agency, has prevented a bill encouraging greater use of encryption from coming to a vote in the House. The concerns of law enforcement agencies are legitimate. But smart criminals are already using encryption, some of which is readily available on the Internet. That was the message conveyed only a few weeks ago by such unlikely allies as Bill Gates of Microsoft and Jim Barksdale of Netscape, who are on opposite sides in the Justice Department's antitrust lawsuit against Microsoft but agree on this issue. The F.B.I. should give up its losing fight against encryption and work with industry to develop new means to catch criminals who use it. One approach under discussion would be to develop software technology that could be surreptitiously placed in a suspect's computer to capture keystrokes before they are encrypted. Any such operation would have to be carried out under strict court control as the electronic equivalent of a search warrant. But law enforcement agencies have to find a legal and ethical way to stay ahead of technology, rather than stand in the way of it. Trying to block advances in the digital age is futile. [End]

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