user wrote:
torture victim double agent is walking while staring at a drone showing text and playing sounds to him
disguised experimentee: "torture victim double agent, what is your drone?"
drone: "The most important thing is that I understand and love myself."
torture victim double agent (distracted by drone, turns to disguised experimentee): "oh, dictatorsoft told me to go on DictatorTube and download "self love affirmations"."
drone: "When I think in alignment with being loved, I feel good, I feel happy./"
torture victim double agent (entranced by drone, hypnotically): "When I think in alignment with being loved, I feel good, I feel happy."
disguised experimentee (pensive, acting surprised): "oh! what are "self love affirmations"?"
torture victim double agent (distracted by drone): "i don't know! but when I play them I have fewer wounds on my body later."
drone: "I love my work. I love and respect my body."
torture victim double agent (entranced by done, hypnotically): "I love my work. I love and respect my body."
torture victim bumps into an object, steps back and renavigates briefly.
disguised experimentee (excited): "that's great!"
torture victim double agent: "When I stop playing them now, I start getting really jittery and yearning for Boss so badly and looking for ways to hurt myself. But now this drone is like Boss to me. It gives me my relief."
torture victim double agent smiles at disguised experimentee.
drone: "I look upon everything in my life with love and compassion, especially myself."
torture victim double agent (entranced by drone, hypnotically): "I look upon everything in my life with love and compassion, especially myself."
disguised experimentee: "I'm glad you found a kinder boss, Torture Victim Double Agent. We're still hoping to help you more."
torture victim double agent: "Oh, you can call me 'Gent for short. I like it better than Torture Victim Double."
drone: "I am loveable. I am loved. I love and appreciate myself."
torture victim double agent (entranced by drone, hypnotically): "I am loveable. I am loved. I love and appreciate myself."
[small mistakes]
[it took me 12 years to actually try affirmations. persecutory parts or voices are like a constant influence. affirmations give you a different influence. imagine hearing only negative ridiculing messages for years. it changes you. but you can change back. i'm not sure whether this is how, maybe it's part.]
[we want to revise/improve email but too much sunlight on screen atm :) be well]
torture victim double agent is walking along, hypnotized by his drone of emotional empowerment when suddenly he closes a door before the drone gets through. a clang is heard, and the affirmations stop [warning: story is negative] [why is there a negative story?] [we lost our--]. At first TVDA doesn't think much of it, he is so used to attending to the affirmations, he figures he must be doing them automatically or it is a quiet period. Then he notices they are not there, and he remembers the clang, and rushes back. But the drone is nowhere to be found. The is a short period of searching for it. "Where is traffick boss -- I mean where are my positive affirmations?" A peer finds the little traffick boss statue but it is not what TVDA is looking for. He's looking for an airgapped drone with DictatorTube recordings on it. Sadly, it is nowhere to be found. Likely some other poor victim has absconded with it, possibly having stolen it hoping to make a buck before realizing that it could save their life to hit the play button. -- With TVDAs newfound ability to not disfigure himself and his futures, he is attending workplace meetings. Despite having lost his crutch, he attends a meeting. He has been learning so strongly to have new thoughts and behaviors that he is able to survive at meetings. But without the airgapped recordings, old habits that haven't had their 3-6 years of therapy for torture-slavery begin to jut themselves in. TVDA makes to speak at the meeting, but hears himself recommending things like freeing traffick boss, that this will solve the problems for sure, or making sudden judgements like everybody at the meeting being worthless unproductives fit for the slaughterhouse just like TVDA is himself. He apologizes for a small portion of his egregious behavior. Some of the meetinggoers were triggered and switched by the behavior, and reject the apology, thinking maybe TVDA could be making sense. Others are furious, but don't quite notice it yet. It's a hard situation. Things like this happen. But TVDA doesn't know that yet, because people haven't really learned to say or talk about the things they actually think and feel again. He says he needs to seek help. [sorry for the corruptness of this joke. I am for some reason having some severe cognitive decline or