[scrm-pvt] Draft article for GGF newsletter

[Hiro Kishimoto]

Hi all,

Mark Linesch has wordsmithed the very first line of his front page.

"As our community gathers at GGF14 in Chicago, ..."
I am sure this is ok for everyone.

Thanks,
----
Hiro Kishimoto

Hiro Kishimoto wrote:
> Hi all,
> 
> Karen Strong gave me DMTF's comments. Thanks Karen.
> I've revised the article and also add contact information as
> Wayne suggested. The revised article is attached.
> 
> GGF will remain soft and hard copy of our newsletter until
> July 27 (GGF14 day one).
> 
> Thanks,
> ----
> Hiro Kishimoto
> 
> Karen wrote;
>  > The intro speaks of GGF 14 in the future tense (as if this newsletter
>  > will be seen prior to the event). I know the hard copies will go out at
>  > GGF, but do you know if this will be posted electronically prior to
>  > 6/27? If so, that would be releasing the SCRM news early (before the
>  > press release), which is inadvisable. Either the SCRM info should be
>  > removed from the newsletter, or any electronic posting should be held
>  > until the 27th (in which case they may want to change the tense).
> 
> <HK>
> I've change the very first sentence to "as our community prepared."
> However, I do not change the other two sentences because the newsletter
> will deliver day one and several events happens on and after day one.
> </HK>
> 
>  > -The article on page 3 states that the group has been discussing "next
>  > generation standards for web service based management of networked and
>  > individual resources." Web services are not mentioned in the press
>  > release (except within GGF's quote). This seems to be a difference in
>  > meaning, and we would recommend removing the words "web service based."
> 
> 
> <HK>
> deleted.
> </HK>
> 
>  > -On page 4, the second to the last paragraph includes a number of
>  > descriptions of the landscape document I don't think the group has
>  > agreed to -- and includes a timeframe for publishing (end of this year).
>  > To avoid setting expectations that the group may not meet, we would
>  > recommend removing this paragraph.
> 
> 
> <HK>
> I've replace this explanation by the text in the press release.
> </HK>
> 
>  > -The intro and article state that the SCRM "has been carrying on a
>  > dialogue for almost a year - holding several face-to-face meetings and
>  > monthly conference calls to improve coordination on next generation
>  > standards." This is not mentioned in the press release. While this may
>  > be construed by some as slow progress, I don't personally have a problem
>  > with it appearing in their newsletter. Just wanted to point it out in
>  > case statements of that sort had been a source of contention in the SCRM
>  > group.
> 
> 
> <HK>
> We intend to say the SCRM is well prepared.
> </HK>
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