[scrm-pvt] Draft article for GGF newsletter

[Hiro Kishimoto]

Hi all,

Karen Strong gave me DMTF's comments. Thanks Karen.
I've revised the article and also add contact information as
Wayne suggested. The revised article is attached.

GGF will remain soft and hard copy of our newsletter until
July 27 (GGF14 day one).

Thanks,
----
Hiro Kishimoto

Karen wrote;
 > The intro speaks of GGF 14 in the future tense (as if this newsletter
 > will be seen prior to the event). I know the hard copies will go out at
 > GGF, but do you know if this will be posted electronically prior to
 > 6/27? If so, that would be releasing the SCRM news early (before the
 > press release), which is inadvisable. Either the SCRM info should be
 > removed from the newsletter, or any electronic posting should be held
 > until the 27th (in which case they may want to change the tense).

<HK>
I've change the very first sentence to "as our community prepared."
However, I do not change the other two sentences because the newsletter
will deliver day one and several events happens on and after day one.
</HK>

 > -The article on page 3 states that the group has been discussing "next
 > generation standards for web service based management of networked and
 > individual resources." Web services are not mentioned in the press
 > release (except within GGF's quote). This seems to be a difference in
 > meaning, and we would recommend removing the words "web service based."


<HK>
deleted.
</HK>

 > -On page 4, the second to the last paragraph includes a number of
 > descriptions of the landscape document I don't think the group has
 > agreed to -- and includes a timeframe for publishing (end of this year).
 > To avoid setting expectations that the group may not meet, we would
 > recommend removing this paragraph.


<HK>
I've replace this explanation by the text in the press release.
</HK>

 > -The intro and article state that the SCRM "has been carrying on a
 > dialogue for almost a year - holding several face-to-face meetings and
 > monthly conference calls to improve coordination on next generation
 > standards." This is not mentioned in the press release. While this may
 > be construed by some as slow progress, I don't personally have a problem
 > with it appearing in their newsletter. Just wanted to point it out in
 > case statements of that sort had been a source of contention in the SCRM
 > group.


<HK>
We intend to say the SCRM is well prepared.
</HK>
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