[ot][personal] cult reading notes

[Undiscussed Groomed for Male Slavery, One Victim of Many]

i'm noting how the use of Moon's last name connects with people's
connection to nature. People already have feelings for the moon, and
after the cult they associate those feelings with the cult leader.

similar to pop music: elements from common experience that remind one
of the cult.

the experiences described of untreated floating are things i have had a lot.
it's nice for this chapter to make things make sense. i called the
group but got voicemail again. i have some ways to move things
forward, but the ones i'm used to take time.

the author gives instructions on how to float (still copying not
reading yet, so just getting bits here and there). i'm scared because
of the overlap with my amnesia. i want to hide the instructions from
myself. i need my memories, which includes those of my experiences.

one question idea is "what if all my experiences are floating. all of
them." sometimes it seems this way, sometiems i can't imagine it being
true at all. still a useful question.

barf the author wants us to mutate our own feeling-memoreis. barf.

but i guess there are some i would want to mutate. really strong
undesired ones that don't reflect reality.

the way to mutate is to deliberately call forth the trigger and make a
new positive mental association. from what i've learned of myself now,
i think it would help me to describe the intention verbally internally
as i do it. i'd also want to wear a high quality eeg device during it,
of course, and preserve the recordings it takes of it.

i like how the author's new association is simply something that is
rational and true. this is similar to how i used to defuse or rewire
psychotic-like experiences.

draft went away again
sending this to defend against furtther glitches