[ot][fiction][crazy] Weird Bug Hotline

[Undiscussed Horrific Abuse, One Victim of Many]

Intern: "Hello, Weird Bug Hotline. Is it currently biting you?"

Callee: "Hi, um, not being bitten immediately, but I do get bitten
when I get close."

Intern: "How big is it? Where area of the globe are you in? Does it
have wings? How many?"

Callee: "Do you have time to kind of just help me sort through it? It
involves a lot of race conditions and locks among spaghetti code ..."

Intern: "My goal is to keep you and your community safe, Callee, and
I'm paid for every hour. So it's flightless but pretty big, and there
are a bunch of them? What region?"

Callee: "Well, it's python code, but when I was coding it I kind of
imaginde that I'd make it rust, or node, or erlang, when I shared it
..."

Intern: "Oh, the bugs can probably pick up some of your pheremones and
body language when you're traveling like that. Some of them are really
tuned into what the key threats are, and how well those threats know
them."

Callee: "I didn't think of that. Probably I was rushing so much I made
these bugs myself, making all this spaghetti code. Thanks, Weird Bug
Hotline."

Intern: "Call back if something else starts buzzing in your ear!"