Eric Cordian wrote:

we have this story out of Georgia, where a student was suspended for a day for failing to properly prostitute himself to corporate johns on behalf of his pimping principal. -----

EVANS, Ga. (AP) -- It's the real thing all right -- suspension.

High school senior Mike Cameron is serving a one-day suspension today for wearing a Pepsi shirt on Coke Day, an event school officials crafted in an attempt to win a $500 contest run by the Coca-Cola Bottling Co.

It could be worse. They could have transferred me to the "Home Shoppers Bargain Psychiatry Warehouse". That's the worst of the worst. The Shop'ers have the poorest government on WebWorld. When the citizens of the former world governments got to choose their citizenship at the end of the Channel Revolution every deadbeat compulsive spender on the face of the Earth signed up with the Home Shopper Channel Government. ~~~ http://www.clas.net/~dave/public/webworld/#Chapter_4

The Coke-themed day was part of an effort to win the contest. The award will go to the school that comes up with the best method of distributing promotional discount cards to students.

The Shop'ers ran ads showing Leona purchasing magnificent jewelry and other high-priced items from the Home Shopping Channel and the masses rushed to join the bandwagon. Some of the slightly more discriminating people became citizens of the Consumer Channel, but they were few and far between. ~~~ http://www.clas.net/~dave/public/webworld/#Chapter_4 The Sex Channel offered some rather interesting incentives for new citizens. They did quite well in the final ratings (what had formerly been called 'election results'), despite fierce competition from the S&M Channel, the Group Sex Channel, the Lesbian Channel, the 'Buck Futters' Channel, and a host of minor players vying for the same basic audience. ~~~ http://www.clas.net/~dave/public/webworld/#Chapter_11

School officials also integrated Coke into class instruction for the day, invited Coke executives from Atlanta headquarters 100 miles away as speakers and gathered students outside to spell ``Coke'' for the photograph.

No doubt General Noriega was given a day-pass to drop one-pound packages of Peruvian flake out of a helicopter, as loudspeakers blared, "You deserve a brick today..."

~~ Eric Michael Unamused T:.O:.T:.O:. Mathematical Munitions Division, Room 200, Mathematical Munitions Addition Mathematical Munitions Subdivison, Rocky III Road, Corollary Corral, California "Drink What Thou Wilt Shall Be The Whole Of The Law"