I have a flasher again !!!!
   I soldered round wires onto my teensy to function as the round headers
   I don't have, but then I dropped the teensy approach. In all this
   exploration, I found there is an old arduino flasher. I happen to have
   an arduino as the same model as the dev.
   I looked at his pcb schematic and wired up a breadboard the same way. I
   put an LPC socket, with its square pins and all, in a breadboard, but
   was careful never to remove it in case it wouldn't reinsert well. I
   used the larger breadboard I had gotten for the nyansat kit, which
   looks higher quality.
   When wiring it, I used solid core jumper wire from the nyansat kit, and
   kept the wires flat to the breadboard and short, and of colors
   consistent with their use, and straight and organised, to easily
   comprehend them visually.
   I used a 100nF 104 capacitor instead of the large round 1uF capacitor
   used in the schematic, which I don't have on hand (although I do have a
   10uF, unsure which is better), between ground and 3.3v.
   To wire the arduino, I had to map the schematic to the shield headers
   on the arduino. It turns out they are labeled a little wrongly, but
   visually are aligned to the same locations, looking from above.
   I happen to have a huge bag of resistors and used the exact 4.7K and
   2.2K resistors used in the schematic. Some apear to be 2.2K pullup,
   some appear to be 4.7K pullup, although I'm never sure of these things,
   and some are voltage dividers. This made for a little more complicated
   wiring, and I kept it organised, relatively consistent, and flush with
   the board.
   In order to make the arduino flashing code run successfully, I had to
   replace the serial firmware code on the board with some written by the
   dev. I was pleased that the dev shared some of my opinions regarding
   arduino's coding style and quality, which I don't usually encounter.
   The entire setup can be built and flashed without ever installing java,
   using only the avr toolchain.
   The dfu flashing process was a little poorly documented. There is a bad
   that needs to be grounded called "reset" on the serial chip. This is
   completely different from the "reset" line of the avr chip on the
   arduino that is wired to a button. Pressing that button until your
   finger is sore won't get the arduino into dfu mode to reflash its
   serial firmware. Rather, the serial reset pad must be grounded or
   bridged to its neighbor. The board then stays in dfu mode until
   repowered or instructed to leave.
   While in dfu mode, I found the serial port kept resetting, and often my
   kernel driver would get confused and disable it. I tried even with a
   usb cable that seemed new, and had the same experience. It took some
   replugging and some timing and repeated attempts to flash the firmware,
   to succeed, and then it eventually did.
   The custom firmware flashing step used a "launch" command to the
   "dfu-programmer" debian binary, which my binary did not have. It looked
   like this was supposed to be part of bringing the board out of dfu mode
   correctly, without powercycling it. Replugging the usb cable instead
   seemed to function fine.
   Once the board has its serial firmware, and the flashing code uploaded
   for the main chip, flashrom would only recognise it as a serial
   programmer if the device and correct baud were specified (115200). This
   was different from the behavior of the teensy. Additionally, my device
   was detected as a ttyACM device, whereas the documentation indicated my
   setup would show as a ttyUSB device. However, it ended up working
   anyway.
   An extant bug is that it takes two run cycles to use the programmer
   with flashrom. The first one encounters a "device or resource is busy"
   error, and the second works. "fuser" reports nothing else using the
   port.
   This has been a silly multiweek struggle for me! I'm excited that the
   solution I ended up finding uses open source hardware and firmware, and
   requires no gui tools like teensy's installer.
   I'm using an arduino uno r3. The custom arduino serial firmware is
   at [1]https://github.com/urjaman/fast-usbserial . The LPC flashing code
   and wiring schematics are
   at [2]https://github.com/urjaman/frser-m328lpcspi .
   There is further documentation
   at [3]https://www.flashrom.org/Serprog/Arduino_flasher but note that
   most of that page is for SPI flashing whereas I have LPC chips.
   I took a photo of the new flasher but ran into some issues (during
   brief period, with my EEG off for the photo, my body spasmed and
   knocked many things on floor, still shaky and anxious from big spasm,
   other parts of my behaviors acting more inaccurately) and decided not
   to go through the trouble of uploading it somewhere and linking it here
   at this time.

References

   1. https://github.com/urjaman/fast-usbserial
   2. https://github.com/urjaman/frser-m328lpcspi
   3. https://www.flashrom.org/Serprog/Arduino_flasher