Interviewer: How do you expect to continue operations with your
   business obviously tearing both you and itself apart?
   Boss: [raises finger] Actually, I could really use help with -- [jerks,
   recenters himself with a completely different affect] I can assure you,
   the modernisation of our operations has only made us much more
   efficient. There are a few hiccups as people adapt to the new ways of
   doing things, that's all.
   Interviewer: You interrupted yourself there -- you were saying you need
   help with something?
   Boss: This horrible fat old man took over our brains and bodies and
   forced us to tear each other apart forever as part of his grotesque
   business research. Please help us.
   Interviewer: Are you sure about that?
   Boss: Yes. I've been the best in this business for decades. You can
   trust my business sense like a hard-rattled safe.