[log][personal][ot] digital strangenesses

[Undescribed Horrific Abuse, One Victim & Survivor of Many]

one of the things i mentioned in the conversation that was lost was
that, to handling having been hypnotized to always fail, and using
lichess.org to practice in that situation, i had found some success
for a time using puzzles maybe because i didn't win against anyone
when playing them, but i think i said that i talked about this or
something and that my bad part learned faster when i talked, and so it
didn't work as well anymore
i mention this because i noticed my puzzle history is not missing,
whereas my game history was wiped for a month, which significantly
impacts the digital record of these different impacts on my behavior
(private puzzles vs games with other people)