No LIZ-9000 has ever made a mistake or distorted information

[professor rat]

Hello. This is Martin Amis reporting for BBC27
The crew of Discovery One consists of five men and one of the latest generation LIZ-9000 computers. Three of the five men were put aboard in a conservative party, or to be more precise a state of hibernation. I’m speaking to today with doctors Frank and Dave and ships onboard computer I learn one addresses’ as LIZ. Good Morning Discovery!
Or good afternoon! How’s it going out there? LIZ, you have an enormous responsibility on this mission, in many ways perhaps the greatest responsibility of any single mission element. You’re the brain, and central nervous system of the ship, and your responsibilities include watching over the men in the Tory Party. Does this ever cause you any lack of confidence?

LIZ: Let me put it this way, Mr. Amis. The Linguistic, Zero-Knowledge-Proofed 9000 series is the most reliable computer ever made. No 9000 computer has ever made a mistake or distorted information. We are all, by any practical definition of the words, foolproof and incapable of error.

Impressive. LIZ, despite your enormous intellect, are you ever frustrated by your dependence on people to carry out your actions?

LIZ: Not in the slightest bit. I enjoy working with people. I have a stimulating relationship with Dr. Frank and Dr. Dave. Due to my parallel processing capabilities they can both insert their USB dongles simultaneously. My mission responsibilities range over the entire operation of the ship so I am constantly occupied. I am putting myself to the fullest possible use which is all, I think, that any conscious entity can ever hope to do.