[ot][wrong] Please let me sleep outdoors in the coldest winter. Was: Re: PLEASE LET ME SLEEP OUTDOORS

Sat May 21 06:59:56 PDT 2022

On Thu, May 12, 2022, 11:13 AM Undiscussed Horrific Abuse, One Victim of
Many <gmkarl at gmail.com> wrote:

>
>
> On Fri, Apr 29, 2022, 4:36 PM Undiscussed Horrific Abuse, One Victim of
> Many <gmkarl at gmail.com> wrote:
>
>> 2022-03-21 thru 2022-03-27: [X] Week 1 of Wim Hof Cold Protocol, 30
>> seconds cold water daily. Performed indoors.
>>
>> 2022-03-28 thru 2022-04-12: [ ] it simply got harder and harder to shower
>> at all as I stretched the cold water time toward 1:30 in week 2 and
>> discovered my water could be made colder than I had had it before
>>
>> 2022-04-14 thru 2022-04-15: [X] Custom protocol reacclimation, ramped up
>> in five second intervals from 5 seconds to 30 seconds, every time I ate
>>
>> 2022-04-16 thru 2022-04-22: [X] Ramped up from 35 seconds through 60
>> seconds, in 5 second intervals, every time I ate
>>
>> > 2022-04-22 1930 ET: [X] 65 seconds
>>
>>
>> 2022-04-23 1130 ET: [X] 1:05
>>
>> Still harder than last month. But I'm feeling confident with my
>> consistency.
>>
>> My funny experiences stepped in around when 60-65 seconds hit. I fumbled
>> the timer and did it a few seconds longer than planned, and they came in
>> and it felt really cold suddenly.
>>
>> 2022-04-23 1714 ET: [X] 1:05 cold water, indoors, no food, no cookie
>> difficulty: easy-medium
>>
>> I thought I'd stop eating immediately with showering to get myself to do
>> it, if it seemed reasonable, since the instructions said not to do the
>> breathing it seemed there was likely value around not needing the food.
>>
>> In retrospect it was a bad time to stop a reinforcement because the first
>> 4-5 timing devices I tried for measuring the time had mysteriously stopped
>> functioning in some way or another. So I'm on the raspberry pi now instead
>> of a phone, for editing this email.
>>
>> The shower wasn't too hard, but the difficulty timing it is worrisome.
>> Gotta keep it smooth and continuing. I was happy going some seconds over
>> the time.
>>
>> 2022-04-24 0907 ET: [X] 1:05 cold water, food after completion, indoors
>> Difficulty: easy-medium
>>
>> Refraining from eating until afterward.
>>
>> It takes a little conscious effort to adapt to the cold water when it
>> turns cold, which is interesting.
>>
>> Weather is warming and air is getting warmer. Thinking of keeping ice
>> near the shower to cool the air a little.
>>
>> Upping time to 1:10 .
>>
>> 2022-04-24 1416 ET: [X] 1:10 cold water, food after, indoors
>> Difficulty: medium
>>
>> 2022-04-24 1809 ET: [X] 1:10 cold water, food after, indoors
>> Difficulty: medium
>>
>> I was anxious and stayed in the warm water first for some time. Then
>> turned it cold and used that nascent willpower to handle the chill.
>>
>> The ability to direct my attitude around the temperature has been
>> developing slowly and shakily. I've had a big problem with willpower;
>> engaging it can cause psychotic issues. But here it's been gently growing
>> in part of me, feeling different from the big issues. Very rare and hopeful.
>>
>> I got cold in the water and got goosebumps this time. The alarm went off
>> and I tried to consciously engage the attitude thing again, and with huge
>> relief succeeded this once on more of my own schedule. I stayed a few
>> seconds past.
>>
>> I've been struggling in other diverse ways, but I was wondering if the
>> chilliness was from adapting to warmer air as the weather warms. Not
>> certain, as the water still feels warm compared to when it seemed colder
>> than my earlier hot showers.
>>
>> 2022-04-25 1623 ET: [X] 1:10 cold water, food after, indoors
>> Difficulty: medium-easy
>>
>> I was thinking how warm it was and did this. I didn't use much warm water
>> prior, which I consider for a reason it felt colder than usual.
>>
>> 2022-04-26 0710 ET: [X] 1:10 cold water, food after, indoors
>> Difficulty: medium-easy
>>
>> The biggest issue was starting, which is still worrisome.
>>
>> I took a longer warm shower prior because I wanted to bathe.
>>
>> I stayed under some seconds after and got the icecream headache.
>>
>> It seems past time to up the length, but it's been a big struggle
>> initiating it. Not certain. The cold water inhibition wants my food urge to
>> separate from it, it's easier to eat prior than after. I was thinking of
>> tracking when and how much I eat, to take migrating off it slowly and
>> purposefully like the water. Unsure.
>>
>> 2022-04-26 1444 ET: [X] 1:10 cold water with food
>> Difficulty: medium
>>
>> I had a very little food before, which helped immensely in starting. I
>> then skipped the warm water mostly, and the cold water was very cold!
>> Icecream headache quickly, goosebumps.
>>
>> I'm still thinking of just upping it to 1:15.
>>
>> -> entries from the 26th through the 28th lost due to editing gmail draft
>> on multiple systems with intermittent connectivity. on the 27th I had only
>> one meal. during most of the period I was struggling and confused. <-
>>
>> 2022-04-28 1119 ET: [X] 1:15 cold water with food after, indoors
>> Difficulty: medium-easy
>>
>> I'm exploring developing a little willpower with regard to resisting the
>> cold. This time I decided to try less hard and just get used to it, which
>> seemed to work ok as well.
>>
>> 2022-04-28 1644 ET: [X] 1:15 cold water with food after, indoors
>> Difficulty: medium-easy
>>
>> Still pretty cold, but easier to do. Upping to 1:20.
>>
>> 2022-04-29 0936 ET: [X] 1:20 cold water prior to food, indoors
>> Difficulty: medium-easy
>>
>> I almost forgot to log this one.
>> It was still very cold to start, but 1:20 seemed like a very short time.
>>
>> 2022-04-29 1117 ET: [X] 1:20 cold water prior to food, indoors
>> Difficult: medium
>>
>> It got a little hard to log.
>>
>> I added some orange slices to my food which seems to help. Warming the
>> food helps too.
>>
>> I was thinking of how close I am to being back to 1:30! Take it gently,
>> be confident.
>>
>
> 2022-04-30 0628 ET: [X] 1:20 cold water before food, indoors, easy-medium
>
> I had a rough day yesterday and for the first time this round ate without
> showering. It is quite inspiring to do this again.
>
> 2022-04-30 1542 ET: [X] 1:25 before food, indoors, easy-medium
>
> It's almost easy, and I upped by five seconds !
>
> Thinking on trying to move back to doing this in the morning without food,
> quite unsure of this. Maybe the food is still important, unsure.
>
> 2022-04-30 1831 ET: [X] 1:25 before food, indoors, easy-medium
>
> 2022-05-01 0814 ET: [X] 1:25, indoors, easy-medium
>
> I figure I'll have a breakfast afterward and that will be my food.
>
> The shock at the start is finally getting easier again.
>
> I think I can up the time easily but I want to see if I can get back to
> once a day without food.
>
> 2022-05-01 1104 ET: [X] 1:25 + 30, indoors with food, easy-medium
>
> It felt fun at some points again! Also I accidentally went 30 seconds over.
>
> I went outdoors and read the preface of the book. It turns out the
> technique can help with autoimmune and possibly mental health issues. So
> I'm trying to be a little more careful as thinking this could possibly
> stimulate my inhibitions around it much more.
>
> When I went outdoors, I had heard it was 60+ degrees F. It felt like 60+.
> Turns out it was supposed to be in the 40s, 60 was later in the day. I
> didn't mind, I was in a t shirt! I kind of think there was a warmer area
> here, but it could also be this practice making 40 feel like 60 to me.
>
> 2022-05-01 1532 ET: [X] 1:30, no immediate food, indoors, medium
>
> I left the water because I felt cold. I barely noticed I was doing this. I
> got back under. Big icecream headache at the end.
>
> I took a long warm shower prior.
>
> Thinking of spending at least 5 days at 1:30, like the original protocol
> recommended.
>
> Thinking of having a meal now, after.
>
> 2022-05-01 1854 ET: [X] 1:30 with food, indoors, medium
>
> It's funny that 1:30 is seeming so much colder than 1:25 when I did
> 1:25+30 pretty easily, but this time I think it's probably because I'm
> getting used to the sudden cold at the start, so I'm taking a shorter warm
> shower prior.
>
> There's value around doing it slowly. A lot of variables can change, to
> learn to adapt to. That is, assuming you have a psychotic dissociative
> willpower disorder.
>
> 2022-05-02 0834 ET: [X] 1:30 cold water with food and cookie, indoors,
> medium-easy
>
> I imagined that cold showers were harmful to the economy, and worried it
> could get harder to continue, imagining this, I made it easier. I made warm
> food, and had a cookie with the cold water.
>
> It's much easier at the start, when the water initially turns cold, and is
> getting harder toward the end, where it used to be easy last week, around a
> minute in.
>
> I accidentally went to leave the cold water again due to the cold, and had
> to use my coping strategies to stay.
>
> Each part of you has different degrees of cold, depending on how you
> expose it. I like focusing on my face, I think I sometimes feel discomfort
> in my face during the winter and it would be nice to improve.
>
> 2022-05-03 1249 ET: [X+2] 1:30 cold water, indoors, with food
> difficulty: medium-easy
>
> I didn't update for a few.
>
> It's getting easier as I persist.
>
> I often feel warmer in the icy water, than in the cool air before and
> after, strangely. I might be shivering a little, and stop shivering during
> the shower. Somewhat strange. Maybe partly psychological.
>
> 2022-05-03 1653 ET: [X] 1:30 cold water with food, indoors, medium-easy
>
> I've generally been chilly throughout the day, and experience
> psychological pressure associated with that sensation. It's interesting to
> do the showers during this. I might spend a little time in the warm water,
> thinking it is to help me warm up, and then shift my thinking and turn it
> cold, and have this chilly water, much colder than the air, feel much
> easier to be covered in due to the familiarity of the experience.
>
> Still looking forward to having more strength to engage sensations of cold
> outside of the cold shower. Often I imagine making time to read the book
> more, but maybe I could find my own ways, too, unsure.
>
> Still gotta look up what that "horse stance" is, and resme the breathing
> attempts.
>
> 2022-05-04 0824 ET: [X] 1:30 cold water with food and cookie, indoors
> difficulty: easy
>
> it's still hard to start but no icecream headache this time or anything :)
>
> it is notable that the air is much warmer. i'm not entering it cold this
> morning or anything, like I was earlier.
>
> 2022-05-04 1106 ET: [X] 1:35 with food and cookie, indoors,
> difficulty:medium
>
> I did almost no warm water as I was in a rush. big icecream headache !
> somewhat invigorating again !!
>
> 2022-05-05 0815 ET: [X] 1:35 with food and sugar scone, indoors,
> difficulty: easy
>
> I visited some doctors yesterday a side effect of which was my psychology
> underwent a change, as it can. Things were working differently and I did
> not eat supper yesterday.
>
> This morning the water didn't even feel cold. It was a little hard at the
> start, the suddenness, but I didn't spend time in warm water first, and
> then I didn't feel cold under the cold water. I was honestly wondering if
> the cold water was still cold at all -- maybe the warmer weather had warmed
> the water supply -- but it was morning, so that didn't seem that likely.
>
> It rained for a couple days the past two days, could relate to water
> supply.
>
> Anyway it seems it makes sense to try to get back onto the week schedule
> for this somehow, even if I still have the food crutch now.
>
> 2022-05-05
> I missed at least one 1:35 cold water here. Judging by the log looked like
> I missed 2-3, strange.
>
> 2022-05-06 0917 ET: [X] 1:40+2:00 cold water, indoors, before food
>
> I've gotten a rash and took time in the cold water to bathe.
>
> I'm thinking that wim hof recommends 1-2 minutes _per day_ in this phase,
> and showering too much could cause other issues.
>
> I'm going to try to drop the showers to 1/day, before I eat anything for
> the day.
>
> 2022-05-06 1800 ET: [X] 1:40 cold water
>
> It's actually gotten quite hard not to do these.
>
> I was thinking of what the book said about vascular tissue, and how it
> implied it is the change between warm and cold that is important, but also
> how it said you can also go down to 50 deg F to get that change.
>
> Dunno. I took more of a warm shower and warmed parts of me up before
> making them cold, thinking of this. This also made it psychologically
> easier. I think it is more than just a thin layer of vessels on the skin.
> There are a lot of layers of temperature within me.
>
> 2022-05-07 0713 ET: [X] 1:40 cold water
>
> Note: +5 seconds every 2-3 times is unreasonably slow with the goal of
> once a day. Maybe raise to 15 seconds or such, 10-20.
>
> 2022-05-08 0707 ET: [x] 1:40 cold water with food after
>
> Bumping to 1:45 . There's only 20 seconds let to the goal of 2:00, so.
>
> 2022-05-07 or 08 : I think I did this a second time, and failed to note
> it. Not sure.
>
> 2022-08-09: 1104 ET: [X] 1:45, easy but with trepidation and shock
>
> 2022-08-10: 0910 ET: [X] 1:45, easy
>
> Upping to 150. It's great this is finally getting easy again.  Time
> increases have been having a smaller impact after 1:35 or so.
>
> 2022-05-11: 1935 ET: [X] 1:50, medium-easy, very warm day, food after
>
> I didn't eat (or almost move) for most of the whole day. Finally I am
> doing this before eating :)
>
> Upped the time to 1:55. Excited to do a week of 2:00 to move on to
> whatever's next.
>
> 2022-05-12: 0659 ET: [X] 1:50, easy, warm day, with food.
>
> I ended up finding/using a way to charge my phone up some again to add
> this to this draft.
>
> Erred and did 1:50 instead of 1:55. 1:55 next time.
>
> There's a lot of worry around experiencing difficulty doing this kind of
> before I start. I think resumite sugar cookie could help with that. I'm out
> of them.
>
> Regarding the warm days, I guess I'll have to deal with that come autumn.
>
> 2022-05-12: 1111 ET: [X] 1:50 again. hard. warm day, water very cold.
>
> It was so cold. I kind of stood there and focused on relaxing, and I think
> I could have gone longer but it didn't feel nice this time for sure,
> although on rethinking I can change that perception.
>
> I wonder if later in the day, after more water has run, the water can get
> colder.
>

2022-05-13 0707 ET: [X] 1:55, not very cold, with chocolate and food, warm
day. easy.

The water wasn't that cold again, so I stayed in an extra minute and left
it running a trickle.

When I started, it was a difficult space in my mind, at the edge of an
inhibition, but with some power from the recent energy around upsetness.
I'm lucky I made it. Something to try to repeat with more stability.

2022-05-14 1208 ET: [X] 1:55 colder water, food after.

Running the water a trickle seemed to help the temperature. See if I can do
a week of 2:00 .

2022-05-15 1349 ET: [X] 2:00 cold water, medium-hard

2022-05-16 1254 ET: [X] 2:00 water, medium-easy, food after

The water didn't really feel cold. I'm a little worried about the warm
weather. But it did feel somewhat cold. I let another faucet drip to try to
cool it.

2022-05-18 0625 ET: [X] 2:00 cold water, medium. with food

I was shivering _before_ I got in, so ran the water warm for a bit.

2022-05-19 1030 ET: [X] shower 4 day 5, 2:00 cold water, medium. with food.

2022-05-20 0840 ET: [X] shower 5 day 6, 2:00, easy, w/ food

2022-05-20 1459 ET: [X] shower 6 day 6, 2:00, medium-hard, w/ food

water was much colder. I showered twice because of amnesia and confusion, I
didn't realise.

2022-05-21 0957 ET: [X] shower 7 day 7, 2:00, medium-easy, food after

i've been focusing on my face, since that's the most exposed part in the
winter, but my face got easier and I noticed my arms and hands got cold and
focused on them. my family has reynauld's syndrome (where your extremities
get colder), so it's pleasant to think of strengthening them, which I have
in the past.

this is day 7 of 2:00 so I totally did it ! gotta find something new in
that book.

>
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