The year is 2036

[Douglas Lucas]

Today historians look back on what got humanity through the 2020s. "It
was a bunch of angry ravings on the cypherpunk email list," Dr
Thoughtful Brain told Exasperated Quarterly. "Randos insulting other
randos clinched liberation." World nonleaders of anarchism plan to
establish an international holiday celebrating the hard work of
cypherpunks blotting out insightful knowledge with useless rants. Asked
for details on cypherpunk ideology, Dr Brain said the focus was on
building fandoms for computery celebrities selected for amplification by
corporate media. "The list went for years without a single line of code
posted," he said. During the conversation, an environmentalist shoved
his way in and demanded this writer report on declining oxygen resulting
from plankton extermination. Cypherpunks responded with the subject
line: "Fuck oxygen, whatever that is. Computers don't use it. Off
topic."