Breaking News: Robinhood Rebrands as 'Libra'

[Gunnar Larson]

*SILICON VALLEY - Embroiled in the naturally malevolent
evolutionary controversy of brand fakery
<https://thecapital.io/article/robinhoods-brand-fake-vs-paypals-crypto-corruption-MLic2ot6v5Vurqr5xBT>
in
the name of manipulating humanity, Robinhood Markets (a financial services
company) rocked the brand marketing world by finally coming to its senses
while vindicating Mr. Hood’s legacy. The company has distanced itself from
the old Robinhood firm image of “we take advantage of our customers” with a
fresh rebrand as ‘Libra.’*


*Celebrated humanitarian Richard Simmons applauded the name change. “Mr.
Hood’s story of altruism is loved by young and old alike world-wide. Today
Mr. Hood is vindicated from association to the former Robinhood’s tricky
company shenanigans. The new ‘Libra’ image is a super smart act of serving
our country well... I hope the all-stars at Bear Stearns will join me in
congratulating the new ‘Libra’ brand,” Simmons said.*


*The nature and timing of the brand change raised eyebrows in New York, a
recent familiar reaction to news from our pal
<https://thecapital.io/article/robinhoods-brand-fake-vs-paypals-crypto-corruption-MLic2ot6v5Vurqr5xBT>s
from the Valley.Gleefully contemplating the long term impact on society,
this reporter touts the courage of the real Mr. Hood for opposing forces
similar to that of the former Robinhood.History will celebrate the newly
minted Libra, which will be hailed for its valor in rebranding, even though
it did so to escape the regulatory cloud that has hung over the Robinhood
project since it first came into the public domain.(A Satirical Monograph
on the News) *
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