[ot][spam][crazy][personal][crazy][crazy][crazy] crazy things

[Undescribed Horrific Abuse, One Victim & Survivor of Many]

there seems to be some form of "energy", maybe kind of like small
feedback loops that can be held and repurposed for other actions by
dissociated parts .. i accidentally gave a bad part some of this ...

the energy is associated with conscious focus, so sometimes i try to
use skilled areas to redirect it. when there's experience it can more
easily pull the behavior in.

the bits seem to associate with contexts and parts of experience, so
sometimes a key is to find areas i have skill with that the other bit
did not associate with. it kind of seems like it has existing
associations it can retain, and then might have to quickly grab in
things it finds useful when it enters something like this, i could be
quite wrong.