[spam][crazy][fiction][random] Non-Canon MCBoss Spinoffs

[Undescribed Horrific Abuse, One Victim & Survivor of Many]

Gardener: "I need to be able to act kindly to people and have them
respect me for that kindness. Can you understand this need?"

Experimentee Diplomat [fake cigar in mouth]: "Well I suppose, if you
swear about it a lot and act really horrible when you say it, that I
have that need too and it makes sense."