Morning Spam

Karl gmkarl at
Fri May 14 07:04:38 PDT 2021

Hey watch out for getting schizophrenia from people like me.  We don't want
that any more contagious than it already is.

Somebody sent out a memo implying we _wanted_ the mind control business to
expand with new kinds of mind control, rather than freeing everybody ... is
that going to get redacted or anything?


All the security of everything has fallen apart because all the people
responsible for it are busy being mind controlled by security interests.

A lone teenager boots up their new private-club variant of metasploit and
begins scraping different government security video feeds to see if
anybody's naked out there.

They bump into a regular meeting at Well-Respected Psionic Weaponry
Corporation.  It's a room with a large rectangular table with maybe 37
diverse people sitting at it.

There's an audio feed, too, and everybody in the room is crying like a baby.

[ they're crying at a meeting?  how do they do that without making other
businesses all burst into tears randomly? ] [ sometimes we let that happen
but usually people are embarrassed and set up counterprocesses ] [ oh
that's why people are freezing when they see tragic stuff!  could you make
the counterprocesses more embarrassing than the tears? ] [ ... maybe ask me
again later? ]

The teenager stops and watches a little, curious what people are crying
about at this classified meeting.  There is a media setup with large
speakers showing a huge video on the wall of one member sitting at the
table.  Their amplified bawling drowns out all the rest.

"{sob} I'm so sad that I am still {bawls} torturing and {weeps
uncontrollably} mind controlling the people of my country to sustain my
leadership.  {sobs deeply} After we {bawls hopelessly} mind controlled
ourselves in a {weeps even louder} fucking feedback loop {sobs} to protect
our cultures from {bawls ridiculously} imaginary opposing mind controllers
{sobs} I haven't been able to stop."

Heartfelt applause amidst the sobs.  Somebody strangely dressed in
coveralls glances at the security feed, but most people ignore it.

The video on the screen fades to the person to the left of the previous
speaker, who is also crying.

"{bawling} I can't handle that I am still {sobs} torturing and {weeps
unbelievably} mind controlling the workers, users, and clients of my social
and military businesses, and even {bawls aghast} the federal agents who
investigate them.  {heaves and sobs} After we {cries more} programmed the
computers to defend the system on their own {weeps hopelessly} it's been
all I've been to do, {sobs} even over doing my own work.

The teenager is now crying themselves.

Applause, and the video fades to the person in coveralls.

"I'm just here to help out and don't need a turn.  But since I have one,
how are things going for people?"
   "This is great!" "Yeah!" "It's so much better to cry about having taken
over the world than to be randomly experimented on by the computers!"
"Great.". They manipulate something in their hand, and everyone suddenly
gasps together almost as if they are having sex, except for one
hard-to-make-out person in the corner who almost looks like they might be
in the midst of multiple surgical operations, their injuries are so

The half-disassembled person screamed and yells, "What are you doing???"
Everyone seems taken aback.

"Sorry!  I ... I thought they liked it.  Everyone says they like it."

 "You want to be staring at your own cut-up brain wondering what you are
using to think, while I mess with the lives of your friends in patterns
that help me remember which of them go in which of your memories, _again_?
Use less reward stimulation!"

The person in coveralls looks confused, but responds "I'll use less." and
the video shifts to another member.

Everybody is staring almost violently angrily at the injured person who
said not to reward.  The injured person shifts and seem to glance back at
people, and everyone's expressions change to bliss and almost love.  "Thank
you for taking care of us," the next speaker says heartfelt, before
resuming the next session of tears.

Note:  "social network" was included here to help me remember that facebook
employees, after learning that their marketing algorithms were causing them
to use facebook instead of doing the work of maintaining it, turned these
algorithms on themselves in attempt to regain their willpower.  This was
mentioned in "the social dilemma", a documentary.  Such people could likely
help us.
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