[OT, but curious] bye bye, 5G...

Mirimir mirimir at riseup.net
Wed Jul 29 18:00:55 PDT 2020

On 07/28/2020 03:35 PM, Cecilia Tanaka wrote:
> On Mon, Jul 27, 2020, 22:23 Mirimir <mirimir at riseup.net> wrote:
>> On 07/27/2020 04:24 PM, Cecilia Tanaka wrote:
>>> My dearest love, may you tell me the reasons why you don't you trust
>>> surgeons, please?
>> Because, for the most part, what they know is anatomy and surgery, and
>> so they tend to see surgery as the best option. They're also more full
>> of themselves than other doctors.
>> The history of spinal surgery, in particular, is replete with all sorts
>> of disastrous operations. See
>> https://duckduckgo.com/?q=malpractice+spinal+surgery&t=ffnt&ia=web for
>> examples.
> Oh, the most disastrous operations in the history of spinal surgery...
> W-O-W, loved it!  All I wanted to see before my pretty complex spinal
> surgery, sweetie!  <3

Just be careful, my dear :)

> Hahahahaha!!!  ;D


> Mirimir, I do love you.  You and my doctor always think I am a very
> rational creature, able to analyze creepy situations with cold blood,
> hahahaha!!!  Nobody else in this world would believe it, hahahahaha!!!  ;D

Yeah, it's hard to be rational when you're broken :(

>> In this specific moment, your answer will probably be very interesting for
>>> me.
>>> Do you appreciate or, at least, trust doctors in general or not?  Some
>>> specifically medical area?
>> I generally don't trust doctors. In the US anyway, they're generally
>> driven too much by greed for money and status. And far too manipulated
>> by the pharmaceutical and device industries. But there are many who are
>> truly caring and competent, of course.
> I do care a lot about a neurosurgeon  - he used to be one of my best
> friends before his marriage -  and the innocent surgeon who thinks I am a
> rational person.  Sweet boy.
> My best friend for years and years was an addicted doctor, Mirimir.  That's
> the reason why I learned a bit about chemicals, my love.  He committed
> suicide and my world became stranger than ever for a considerable time.
> You know I do hate lies and labels, but I was "his sweet high school
> girlfriend" in public.  In real private life, he was gay and had more
> boyfriends than me and all my friends together.  But you know, he was a
> successful doctor and needed a perfect image: - white, male, hetero...  He
> was buried using an Armani suit and red roses, our favorite flowers.  I
> still love him and miss this fucking bitch a lot.

Suicides do fuck up their friends' lives, for sure. It's arguably a
communicable disease. But of course, it's also a basic human right.

>> I trust only a few surgeons.  And I would give my life for only one of
>> them
>>> because he saved me a few months ago.  Not in a surgery, he explained me
>>> very important subjects about my body, trusting in my capacity of
>>> processing informations rationally...  wow...  The human body and its
>>> anatomy are fascinating, an astonishing beauty even when is damaged, hurt
>>> like mine...
>> OK, so _he_ sounds like a _good_ surgeon :)
> Hahahaha!!!  _He_ is a fucking _amazing_ surgeon!!!  I made some specific
> researches about him.  :D
> Don't feel jealous, my love.  I think _he_ has the _same_ preferences than
> me in several areas.  Well, never asked about it.  Sorry, he is the guy who
> will put his hands in my spine, not necessarily in my back.  ;)

I'm not jealous. But it'd be a shame if you were incapacitated ;)

> (There will be a scar, but he will try to preserve my tattoo.)

Maybe he could shape the incision like a lightning bolt. Or a snake :)

> He is a spinal surgeon, darling.  And I didn't tell my parents I can die or
> become paraplegic after the last surgery.  I just want to be a butterfly
> again and get my freedom back.
> I was an hyperactive child and was banned of schools because of it.  I love
> to walk for hours while thinking about a new idea or a problem.  Can you
> mesure the deep intensity of my fear of losing my movements?   :((

I do get that.

> I was shocked.  At same time, he gave me an answer and new perspectives.  I
> wanted it more than everything at that point.  Certainly, it was not a good
> answer, but I had finally a rational justification for the strong pains
> able to make me fainting, able to make my lovely always low blood pressure
> becoming crazily high in some moments...
> My body was/is so fucking healthy that most of doctors simply said it was
> stress, maybe psychological pain...  Sorry, my body and I never were needy
> enough for pretending to be sick for getting attention.  And, well, I do
> love my body.  It survived to real sick shit and is keeping me alive very,
> very well.  Amazing healing capacity, wow...
> Something was wrong and now I know what is and it makes me pretty happy.  I
> can't fix it by myself, but life is funnier than ever because I know I
> won't die:  I will run on beaches again, watching the sea and the sun
> rising, darling.

That does sound wonderful.

> (I just need to win a judicial battle first...  'Meh' things, you know.  I
> am wasting my precious time with bureaucracy, aff...)
> And yes, we are very complicated machines. But fortunately, we're also
>> amazingly good at self-repairing. Although it can take a _long_ time :(
> Sorry, learned to analyze spinal exams in the last months and, well, I love
> my body's efficiency but it cannot to repair this kind of damage alone and
> I am not able to operate my own back, even using mirrors or whatever...  I
> do hate to feel pain, you know.  I sincerely prefer to ask for professional
> help this time, Mirimir!  :((

I've been tempted, I admit.

> Be well <3
> I will be well, sweetheart.  Please, take care and be well too.  I love
> you.  <3


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