[OT, but curious] bye bye, 5G...

Cecilia Tanaka cecilia.tanaka at gmail.com
Tue Jul 28 15:35:41 PDT 2020

On Mon, Jul 27, 2020, 22:23 Mirimir <mirimir at riseup.net> wrote:

> On 07/27/2020 04:24 PM, Cecilia Tanaka wrote:
> >
> > My dearest love, may you tell me the reasons why you don't you trust
> > surgeons, please?
> Because, for the most part, what they know is anatomy and surgery, and
> so they tend to see surgery as the best option. They're also more full
> of themselves than other doctors.
> The history of spinal surgery, in particular, is replete with all sorts
> of disastrous operations. See
> https://duckduckgo.com/?q=malpractice+spinal+surgery&t=ffnt&ia=web for
> examples.

Oh, the most disastrous operations in the history of spinal surgery...
W-O-W, loved it!  All I wanted to see before my pretty complex spinal
surgery, sweetie!  <3

Hahahahaha!!!  ;D

Mirimir, I do love you.  You and my doctor always think I am a very
rational creature, able to analyze creepy situations with cold blood,
hahahaha!!!  Nobody else in this world would believe it, hahahahaha!!!  ;D

> In this specific moment, your answer will probably be very interesting for
> > me.
> >
> > Do you appreciate or, at least, trust doctors in general or not?  Some
> > specifically medical area?
> I generally don't trust doctors. In the US anyway, they're generally
> driven too much by greed for money and status. And far too manipulated
> by the pharmaceutical and device industries. But there are many who are
> truly caring and competent, of course.

I do care a lot about a neurosurgeon  - he used to be one of my best
friends before his marriage -  and the innocent surgeon who thinks I am a
rational person.  Sweet boy.

My best friend for years and years was an addicted doctor, Mirimir.  That's
the reason why I learned a bit about chemicals, my love.  He committed
suicide and my world became stranger than ever for a considerable time.

You know I do hate lies and labels, but I was "his sweet high school
girlfriend" in public.  In real private life, he was gay and had more
boyfriends than me and all my friends together.  But you know, he was a
successful doctor and needed a perfect image: - white, male, hetero...  He
was buried using an Armani suit and red roses, our favorite flowers.  I
still love him and miss this fucking bitch a lot.

> I trust only a few surgeons.  And I would give my life for only one of
> them
> > because he saved me a few months ago.  Not in a surgery, he explained me
> > very important subjects about my body, trusting in my capacity of
> > processing informations rationally...  wow...  The human body and its
> > anatomy are fascinating, an astonishing beauty even when is damaged, hurt
> > like mine...
> OK, so _he_ sounds like a _good_ surgeon :)

Hahahaha!!!  _He_ is a fucking _amazing_ surgeon!!!  I made some specific
researches about him.  :D

Don't feel jealous, my love.  I think _he_ has the _same_ preferences than
me in several areas.  Well, never asked about it.  Sorry, he is the guy who
will put his hands in my spine, not necessarily in my back.  ;)

(There will be a scar, but he will try to preserve my tattoo.)

He is a spinal surgeon, darling.  And I didn't tell my parents I can die or
become paraplegic after the last surgery.  I just want to be a butterfly
again and get my freedom back.

I was an hyperactive child and was banned of schools because of it.  I love
to walk for hours while thinking about a new idea or a problem.  Can you
mesure the deep intensity of my fear of losing my movements?   :((

I was shocked.  At same time, he gave me an answer and new perspectives.  I
wanted it more than everything at that point.  Certainly, it was not a good
answer, but I had finally a rational justification for the strong pains
able to make me fainting, able to make my lovely always low blood pressure
becoming crazily high in some moments...

My body was/is so fucking healthy that most of doctors simply said it was
stress, maybe psychological pain...  Sorry, my body and I never were needy
enough for pretending to be sick for getting attention.  And, well, I do
love my body.  It survived to real sick shit and is keeping me alive very,
very well.  Amazing healing capacity, wow...

Something was wrong and now I know what is and it makes me pretty happy.  I
can't fix it by myself, but life is funnier than ever because I know I
won't die:  I will run on beaches again, watching the sea and the sun
rising, darling.

(I just need to win a judicial battle first...  'Meh' things, you know.  I
am wasting my precious time with bureaucracy, aff...)

And yes, we are very complicated machines. But fortunately, we're also
> amazingly good at self-repairing. Although it can take a _long_ time :(

Sorry, learned to analyze spinal exams in the last months and, well, I love
my body's efficiency but it cannot to repair this kind of damage alone and
I am not able to operate my own back, even using mirrors or whatever...  I
do hate to feel pain, you know.  I sincerely prefer to ask for professional
help this time, Mirimir!  :((

Be well <3

I will be well, sweetheart.  Please, take care and be well too.  I love
you.  <3

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