we lived on a corner in a typical oc tract neighborhood

   i really really need my bedroom to be simple and uncluttered and white
   for calming purposes you know what i mean

    Ill show you what ive been working on soon- theyre presents and i have
                                to give them away first have a nice monday

              even more obsessed with flickr than usual of late

   and i cheat like alot well usually i ease up on weekends but i feel so
     crappy and bloated again that i cant wait to start eating right on
      monday but i have kind of had to tell myself this is just the new
     lifestyle and if i want to indulge every now and again im going to
    cause id rather die than not be able to have some chips and guac or a
   slice of cake every now and again so if i eat like this 90% of the time
    then ive noticed that my body or the scale doesnt mind if i wander in
   my choices a bit the other 10% exercising everyday helps with this too
    i feel like its a great trade off- feeling great and a regular period
                          for a little self control

   Taking the valentines happy girl

   i think they are so cute i love her litte handwriting and she is beyond
   excited to pass them out some other projects she and i looked at but
   didnt get around to (of course) from martha (of course)

   but the pattern is still available

   me um we didnt have disney games when i was five

   i swear nothing makes me happier than a peaceful space and some needles

     where are neighborhoods like that anymore with bushes big enough to
    hide in and kids that go around the block together all afternoon and
   normal sized houses and the old winkfields next door ok i dont need the
            winkfields but id sure love to give my kids the rest

   did anyone else sustain life with saltines from the ages of 13-17

                                                 im just obsessed with him

    messes are piling up around me making it hard to relax and get well i
   cant cuddle grant or cate- they need to stay well- so they are steering
                  clear of me i am bored and tired and achy

    with that heres the stuff i eat salad with chicken a different salad
   with chicken repeat repeat this is the hard thing about it not a ton of
   delicious options im kind of kidding ive found a few other yummy things
                                     too

   but the commonality between each experience was- it was out of my hands
             i occasionally fell in love with someone who couldnt be had i
                occasionally had to run from someone who wouldnt let me go

                                    and then i realized i love her so much

   all day the kids hung out at that corner played on that grass got
   drinks out of that hose went through the secret passage way in the
   juniper bushes and only left the area to go around the block over and
   over again sometimes it was on bikes with banana seats sometimes roller
   skates sometimes big wheels sometimes walking even occasionally on
   skateboards with cardboard boxes on them (our cars)

     it transported me back in time to simpler sunnier days and its been
                    making really happy to stare at today

   she is my best babysitter for cate she takes turns with me putting cate
   to bed and being her pillow