Cypherpunks IQ Test to the Sirs of Dillinger, Brown & Packet, et. al.

[Daniel J. Boone]

> CYPHERPUNKS IQ TEST
> QUESTION #1.

I'll play, and I won't even hide behind a nym.  (Nothing against persistant
nyms, but I snicker when people create new ones to make flippant statements
they don't want associated with their persistant ones.  Cowards....)

> You are walking through the woods alone. A beautiful unclothed woman
> magically appears in front of you. She holds out an apple.
>
> 1. Please darken in the correct choice using a Number Two pencil:
>
> (a) you bite the apple.
> (b) you take the woman.
> (c) you run away.
> (d) a and b, but not c.
> (e) b and c only.
> (f) all of the above.
> (g) none of the above.
>
> 2. Please justify your answer:


(a) is right out.  The apple is obviously bait.  Nobody with more brain than
a rat bites obvious bait unless it's really tasty looking.  I don't like
apples that much no matter how beautiful the fruit bowl is.

(b) is trickier.  Is she bait too?  Probably.  But see comment about tasty
looking above.  Risk exists we wind up measuring IQ of little head.  Also,
is she a witch?  Wow, it gets more interesting.  Witches can be a LOT of fun
and are worth taking risks for.  Only trouble is she'll toss yer shoes in
the long run unless you can at least respect her gods, and she's probably
going to catch you if you fake it.  Finally, "take"?  That's ambiguous.  If
we are talking offer and acceptance, with meeting of minds and whatever,
that's one thing.  If we are talking "Me Og, Og bonk yummy witch and drag
back to cave" it's rather another thing.  I would say circumstances and
literary tradition suggest the former, unless body language and subsequent
conversation indicate otherwise.  So leave (b) on the list of possible
answers.

(c) is right out.  BZZZT!  Wrong answer.  How many times in your life do
fairy tale things happen to you?  Reward is commensurate with risk -- "and
he and the beautiful witch lived happily ever after" is a possible outcome.
Not to diminish the possibility of "and the ugly toad never left the swamp
until the end of his days" but c'mon man, if you've got an ounce of
adventure in your soul you'll stick around a bit and scope things out before
skedaddling like a wuss.

(a) and (b) together are out, because (a) is out.  Basic logic.  So (d) is
out.

(e) is out because (c) is out.  Also because it's rude.  A gentleman should
stick around for coffee or better yet breakfast, and should promise to call,
and then should DO it -- at least once.  (Christ, that sounds like something
out of "The Notebooks of Lazarus Long" -- I must be getting old.)

(f) and (g) are unsatisfactory for the reasons expressed above.

So it looks like (b), by simple process of elimination.  Next question?

-- Daniel