[NOISE] Federal Bureau of Indigestion

[Dave Del Torto]

[forwards mercifully elided]

The following is a direct quote from the Center for Strategic and
International Studies report on GLOBAL ORGANIZED CRIME; the author who
introduces the story swears it's true.

FBI agents conducted a raid of a psychiatric hospital in San Diego that was
under investigation for medical insurance fraud. After hours of reviewing
thousands of medical records, the dozens of agents had worked up quite an
appetite. The agent in charge of the investigation called a nearby pizza
parlor with delivery service to order a quick dinner for his colleagues.

The following telephone conversation took place and was recorded by the FBI
because they were taping all conversations at the hospital.

Agent:	   Hello. I would like to order 19 large pizzas and 67 cans of soda.
Pizza Guy: And where would you like them delivered?
Agent:	   We're over at the psychiatric hospital.
PM:	   The psychiatric hospital?
Agent:	   That's right. I'm an FBI agent.
PM:	   You're an FBI agent?
Agent:	   That's correct. Just about everybody here is.
PM:	   And you're at the psychiatric hospital?
Agent:	   That's correct. And make sure you don't go through the front
	   doors. We have them locked. You will have to go around to
	   the back to the service entrance to deliver the pizzas.
PM:	   And you say you're all FBI agents?
Agent:	   That's right. How soon can you have them here?
PM:	   And everyone at the psychiatric hospital is an FBI agent?
Agent:	   That's right. We've been here all day and we're starving.
PM:	   How are you going to pay for all of this?
Agent:	   I have my checkbook right here.
PM:	   And you're _all_ FBI agents?
Agent:	   That's right. Everyone here is an FBI agent. Can you remember
	   to bring the pizzas and sodas to the service entrance in the rear?
	   We have the front doors locked.
Pizza Guy: I don't _think_ so...  >click<