" . . . I am in the states. This will help me define what being an anarchist is. I used to fit somewhere in this, but definitely don't meet this criteria at this point. . . " Sometimes I feel like I don't fit in any anarchist community, scene, milieu, space, ecology, or whatever since their more-catholic-than-the-Pope anticapitalism bores the crap out of me or the cynical nihilism of the ecofash fringe physically revolts me. In these periods I'm happy to describe myself as small 'L' leftist treading water and hoping for a ' Proudhonian turn '. And I return to this well-thumbed tome Politics and Opinion in the Nineteenth Century (1954) Includes chapter " Proudhon's attack on the state ".