[ot][disrespectful][spam][spam][spam] difficult mcboss
hihi i amhaving the mcboss webcomicish coping urge but my system is an ipad, the touch keyboard responds poorly, and i am having difficulty guiding my hands and fingers so i started this thread to jst put keyboard mess in
one daymcboss andresearchvictimand rebelbartender were walkingalongpaths inaparkthat were adjadnt just by ckincidence they didnt knowthey were walking nexttoeach other. the threepaths were separated by shrubs and things,andthey were busy orchattingand didnt look past the shrubs tosee who else was walking
---- a giant cup of coffee sits onaparj bench, holding the headof BossCorp is in its hand, taking sips now andthen
"mmm!" says the cupofcoffee . "this wealthy industrialist is deliious!" a pet ferret, very large, sits next to the cup of coffee. large pet ferret: "oh yeah the megalomaniacs are the best. reslly got that tang that just wont give up nomatter how lowbthey sink, yknow?" coffee cup: "yeah!" [pauses] "but why would youever giveupif you sank low? imean lookat me, i amjust a cup of coffee, andhereiamdOminatingthis parjbench taking sips from an international crimelord multinational dictator, etcetc?" large pet ferret: "uhhhh" [mobile phone rIngs] "excusemei need togo wash my scuba diver." coffee cup [taking more sips from mcboss]: "have fun!"
largepet ferret isina bathroom, theirhandsin a tubcontaining a confinedman wearing a diving mask and flippers. they are sprayingthe manwith waterand scrubbing him. large pet ferret: "i wrote a computerprogrsm once" scuba djver beIng washed:: "blub?" large pet ferret: "yeah, iwanted totskeover the world. wellnitreally nobodyvactualy doesthatthere nopoint." scuba diver; "blub blub. blub?" large pet ferret: "yeahthensa hadmesay that" scuba diver: "blub blub blub blub blubblub blub blubblub" large pet ferret: "i know, i know, and you have me tocover you with water and wash you clean" scuba diver: "blub.• large pet ferret: "cameras eh. anyway theyvsayits _boring_ totake over thewrold. its notsomething youkeepbdoing. somebody whokeepz being described as running the _wholeworld, not sureIdbelievetheyre thatpowerful."
scuba diver pet ferrer coffe cup and mcbossfordrinkingoutof arewalking downapath in a park coffee cup: "do you needhelpbwritingyourc9mputerprogrsm?" pet ferret large: "theone i wrote lOng ago? whatare you thinking?" coffe cup: "whatkindof progrm wasit?" pet ferretlarge:"kindof a generalpurpoe mutator, changedcode fromOne form toanother, i never really finisheditbut i didmake a cifus wifhitonce" scuba diver starts dancing coffeecup: "mcboss, askscuba diver ifthey areok. with words not spy tech or contractors." mcboss; "scuba diver areyouok. itishardformetoask this." scuba diver: "no. my pet ferret istrying totake credit for yourvirus." pet ferret: "itwas before thosethingsmattered."
mcbossfordrinkingoutof: "you canwrite ckputerprograms? why -" coffee cup: "quiet. leave spacefor others to speaj." scuba diver: "whatsleft tofinish your computerprogram?" pet ferret: "oh it wassolong agp" coffe cup: "it sounds fun towrite aconputerprogram! whatwould youmake ifbyoubweretowriteone now?" pet ferret large: "ohi am just a ferretnow. my paws aretoolumsy."
a tiny mcboss isheldby alargecupof ciffee tha5keeps lifting and tiltinghim totake sips tinymcbossinbetweensips
jaded vivisectee ohdiyiuhave topullmygutsoutagain researcher half robot uhhh jaded vivisectee answerme ! halfrobot researcher uhhhh formally youarenot supposedt beabketospeak the siundsyoumake areofficialkyrandompatterns so you kniw anywaythusis immortakity research we arE qute umpressedyouare ableto stayauve afterbeingrippedapart fororganharvesting and wehavenofuckIngideahowyoydovitanD figuringiuthowuswirthbillionsand trillionsifdollats sirry aboutthis jadedvivisectee oh
once upon a time in mcboss fantasy land a giant elemental made of spy agencies, librarians and schoolteachers, potted plants, and so much more, rose up giant capitalism elemental: “oh this is awkward. i became huge and am towering over the world again like an impending apocalypse.”
once upon a time there was a boring young dying boss of global mind control hanging out with a bunch of anticorporate folk tinyyoungdyingmcboss: "oh hello!"
mind controller cyborg vivisectee 1: "uhhh very sorry if you are doing this counter to your will. you will forget this all soon i assure y--" mind controller cyborg vivisectee 2: "stop messing with those poor helpless people! you have been destroying our humanity!" mind controller cyborg vivisectee 2 shoots mInd controller cyborg vivisectee 2, who crumples to the ground
mind controller cyborg vivisectee 3: "your mind control session is halted for analytical improvement due to suicide. you will be replaced by mind controller cyborg vivisectee 2."
participants (1)
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Undiscussed Horrific Abuse, One Victim of Many