You reach for the keys, and can just barely touch their ring with your fingertips. When you do so, suddenly you feel filled with a sense of the guard. Patrolling hallways, playing poker in the barracks, spending time with a wife and children at home. The words complete in your ears as you touch the keys: "You ... guys need better care than this! I just came from somebody who said the exact same thing." "You need a reminder who you are? You're an apprentice alchemist named ThisIsFakeWakeUp. I'm not quite sure why you're in here, but people in this area are only due for a few months." What a relief to learn your name! Down the hall you hear, "They killed Butch! Somebody killed Butch! Raise the alarm!" A guard is rushing towards the keys and garments. What do you do?
all at same time: wake up, grab keys, force pull keys toward me, and ask new guard who I am so they turn to dust