317984: "My name is 317984, and I'm a slaveowner."
All: "Welcome, 317984."
"How did you become a slaveowner, 317984?"
317984: "About four months ago the local drone hive sent cyborgs to my place, kidnapped me, installed control circuitry and augmentations, and let me free. Now I can barely do anything but spread the borg."
Everyone claps. 317984's neighbors give them hugs.