Marketer Dressed As Boss: “Your childish 1s and 0s are so mundane. You should program the human beings on this mailing list.” Karl:”No. That is not software. You will go away soon, I know you will.” Marketer Dressed As Mind-Controlled Researcher: “It’s really just like software. Human beings have reliable behavior patterns.” Karl: “They do?” [shakes head rapidly, as if to get something out of it] “No! That is so wrong! You have no idea how wrong that is!” Marketer Dressed As Boss [puts on darth vader mask]: “Look into your heart …. !” Marketers shake their heads rapidly, as if to get things out themselves. Marketer Dressed As Boss: “Oh my God. What am I doing??” Marketer Dressed As Mind-Controlled Researcher: “To the deprogramming booth!”