Preface to the First Paperback Edition Since the first publication of this book in the fall of 1988, I have heard from hundreds of people who have told me about the positive impact this book has had on their lives. Lawyers, educators, mental health professionals, and clergy have let me know how valuable it has been in their work. Families have told me incredible stories of how reading it led to a series of phone calls, meetings, and, ultimately, successful interventions with loved ones. Yet nothing gratifies me more than to hear from individuals who were involved with a destructive cult for many years, and who felt that reading this book helped them open a door to freedom. For each of you who might be a current or former member of an organization that is controversial, and to those who are friends or relatives of someone involved with such a group, I have some special words of advice: **If you are currently a member (or former member) of a group or organization that has been alleged to be a cult:** You may find that it takes a great deal of strength, courage, and integrity to make the effort to learn about this phenomenon. But as difficult as it is, keep in mind how much you stand to gain by reading this book in its entirety. Knowledge is power. You may even discover that, although the public views your group as a cult, there in fact is no mind control being used. I have been thanked countless times by members of unorthodox organizations who were able to, once and for all, discuss with their families and friends the criteria I outline in this book. By reading and discussing the material, they can demonstrate that they _are_ exercising their own free will, and continue their involvement with a clear conscience. If you are questioning the ethics, policies, or practices of your group, approach this book with an open mind. However, please be careful about letting other group members know you are reading it, as this might invoke unwanted attention and disciplinary measures from the group’s leadership. If it is at all possible to take some time off and get some distance from other members, I urge you to do so. Find a place where you have minimal pressure and few distractions. I also strongly suggest reading the book at least two times. When reading it for the first time, do so with the perspective that it is describing _other_ groups (preferably ones that you do believe are destructive), and really allow yourself the opportunity to understand the process of mind control and the characteristics of destructive cults. Be sure to make notes as you read, writing down everything you agree with or disagree with, as well as things you want to research further. Then do all the follow-up research necessary to fully answer your questions. Once you have finished the book, give yourself at least a few days before reading it again. When you pick it up a second time, read it objectively, as though it may or may not apply to your own personal situation. Make a new set of notes on what you agree with, what you disagree with, and what you need to research further. On completing this second reading, go find the answers to the issues that are raised pertaining to your own group. Take some time off (if possible, a minimum of a few weeks) and go to a restful place, away from other group members, and gather more information from other sources. _Remember, if the group is a legitimate, valid organization, it will stand up to any scrutiny._ It is far better to find out the truth now than to invest more time, money, and energy, only to discover years later that the group is very different from its idealized image. Truth is stronger than lies, and love is stronger than fear. If you are involved with a religious organization, keep in mind that God created us with free will, and that no truly spiritual organization would _ever_ use deception or mind control, or take away your freedom. **If you are a family member, friend, or loved one of someone who is involved in what you suspect is a destructive cult:** It is best to approach the problem in a systematic and methodical manner. Avoid overreacting and getting hysterical. Don’t jump the gun and tell the person that you have bought this book or are reading it. Wait until you and other relevant people have had a chance to read and get prepared before planning a team Strategic Interactive Approach (SIA). Be sure to also read my book Freedom of Mind: Helping Loved Ones Leave Controlling People, Cults and Beliefs, which will offer a great deal of further information and guidance. Unfortunately, there have been cases in which people have bought this book and impulsively given it to cult members. This can backfire badly if anyone from the cult finds out. Most cult groups fear anything and anyone that might cause them to lose members, and giving a member this book will tip them off that you are educating yourself. Be careful! Instead of sounding the alarm, adopt a _curious yet concerned_ posture. Try to avoid confrontations and ultimatums. Read this book as many times as you need to in order to clearly explain to others the characteristics of mind control, the criteria of a destructive cult, and the basics of cult psychology. The BITE model in Chapter 4 will be a particularly valuable tool. Get as many concerned friends and relatives involved as you can. A strong first step will be for them to read this book, too. If everyone is prepared, they will not be caught off guard. Although this book is meant as a resource, there is no substitute for professional advice geared to your own unique situation. Do not hesitate to seek such help from people who are qualified and informed. I am now developing programs to train mental health professionals, former cult members, and activists on mind control, undue influence, and cult psychology. Also please consult the wealth of free interviews, talks, workshops, and other resources on the [freedomofmind.com] website.