messages out of order 0.0 replying to "flower torture" marked 1:30pm on this device, 1:05pm on other device. in middle of neonaziweirdness here, at end there.
anyway.
I DID NANOJOURNALING !!! I wrote the year on a piece of paper :D :D :D it was very hard to continue enough to celebrate here.
mostly i spampost by not calling it journaling
ANYWAY the current theme is (this is me writing it somewhere) - i got good at puzzles - i didn't get good at certain parts of my mind, i slacked on learning bits or self maintenance bits here or there - my introject / "mind control" takes advantage of those parts of my mind i'm not strong and wise at - i need to get good at these parts of my mind instead of puzzles!
it might be inaccurate -- the harm seems to have a pretty big advantage over me. but it's part of the general theme of learning to resolve the problem. spending time on a problem, any intelligence can eventually resolve it given access to approaches for doing so. ignoring a problem, no intelligence will, it can only happen by chance and rarely.
2025-05-10 I wrote above online about this idea. I also want to write on paper. There is a different thing to write: kind of ummmmmmmmmmmm "there's a solvable problem that is very important. part of solving it is not engaging a lot of the parts of it. that is part of how to solve it." not _quite_ what mean to write but basically