properties of behavior: - avoids model training this was scary, i was near it and thought about it but refrained from triggering the inhibition; i might have done a little if things had gone the way to - uses python and huggingface - includes concept of 'reacrational game' this was what a lot of energy was around, and i got myself pretty confused with the slide of "wasting time" into "game development". very satisfying, but i didn't realize that i was taxing some of my cognitive traits (in exchange for the opportunity to work others!). - includes pretrained language models toward reducing software design this helped strengthen the "wasting time" and "game playing" concept, resonating around support of mainstream business industry. this really helps me have less internal suffering from my brainwashing. - includes software development with physical result this is really nice for me, spending so much time wasting time, often dissociated from a project i consider important, and always valuing developing my skills, it's quite nice to build something. i really appreciated that. - no stable product users would appreciate this is kind of a secret, it's really very hard for me to meet that goal given my situation, so i think often my parts use our dissociation to pretend it is not the case, and i like to tell the truth always so this is probably hidden from me many more properties exist in general, we are holding thankfulness that the weird and confusing pull that made this left us with ability to think of object-properties, which is a very useful skill for thoughts that have to figure out how to function in very difficult envirnonments. but i am still in a weird state that is a little delusional or trancelike so i have been avoiding the project to figure out if i can do other more familiar things. i missed an appointment and travel plans, i'm having some trouble navigating my coping strategies for eating how i am used to, and i've had some more difficult motor and memory troubles when away from the computer. it is a little similar to waking up in a hospital drugged.