given these memories can be destabilizing and potentially imperfectly accurate maybe clearer to say that if i am to continue dissociating from these things by not addressing my information security, i need to figure out how to handle situations that appear dangerous. if a norm is to be established where messages just appear and disappear without a way to trust when, this could be very confusing and difficult in a life that is already those ways. i need a way to believe i can plan around the things i trust in my life. if i don’t trust my messaging at all, how am i supposed to relate with or use it? [some parts missing] so a different app can give the dissociated part a possible reason to build trust that things in the app are real or can be relied on or planned around, and might not behave poorly at an inopportune moment since in reality the problem appears determined to land anywhere, i try to keep a worn out failing part of me ready to handle occasional issues, but it’s still unmanageable/traumatic to have them frequent.