Mind control walked into a bar.

"Bartender, if you ever talk about me, I will mind control you."

 The bartender replied, "how would I ever learn about you unless you had already done that?"

 Nearby, a crowd of newsreporters set their cameras up and aimed them all at Mind Control.  Some of the newscasters can be heard over the clamor, "Live, here at the bar, Mind Control is ..."

 Mind Control retorted back to the bartender, "I can make it a lot worse than it is at the start.  A _lot_ worse.  You don't want to talk about me."

 A newscaster can be heard reporting on the situation, "and here, they just offered _another_ thInly veiled threat.  Let's see that one again ..."

 The bartender replied, "well, um, really when people threaten me I try to warn others, so everyone can be more safe."

 Mind Control said to the bartender, "No.  You will obey."  Mind Control aimed a machine gun at them with one arm, while reaching toward their skull a rotary saw with a display.  On the display was a rapidly spinning spiral, pictures of cute kittens being replaced by headstones from graveyards.

The bartender froze.  "I will o--" .  They jerked.  Then they jerked again.  "Help!!! I'm being mind controlled!!!!". The bartender made to run and then suddenly