i have too much money :( often my bank account is at like -$70 but right now my bank account is at like $2000 O_O it's a trick because a lot of money is coming out of it. also my paypal credit is at owing them more than $1900 but it _looks_ like a lot and i don't know how much of it to spend :S :S :S :S :S <_< >_> i don't know !!!!!!!!!! i don't know. i want to buy the walking-free-from-the-trauma recovery workbook by gillie jenkinson :D i want to buy three of them. i don't know whether i can afford it :( i just got a PO box so now i have somewhere to deliver it to :D :S :S :S :S maybe i will buy three of them! they are so expensive !!!!! why are books so expensive?? i want awesome authors to be able to self publish awesome books and only sell like 2-7 copies of the book but make thousands and thousands of dollars a year writing a book every two years or so and sell them for only a few dollars a copy. i have come up with a way to do this: a money amplification device where the customers pay only a few dollars but it turns into thousands of dollars when it reaches the author's hands. writers would love such a device!!! you could do it with fancy algorithms or economic hijinx or subsidies but it was actually meant as a joke thinking it was impossible. i see now it could be done. like you could make an authorship-mined cryptocurrency. O_O uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh anyway i dunno how many copies to buy :( it's really hard to _look_ at the workbook. if i had multiple copies i could give them away. also i attend a cult recovery group and nobody at the group seems to have heard of the workbook. it's smaller than i thought it would be. i want to share it!!! but it's expensive :S :S :S --- we had this problem in TI groups too. people would _sell_ resources to people who _needed_ the resources to survive and _had no money_. this problem persists in cult recovery groups. one core of the problem is possibly that the people producing the resources also have no money. capitalist mind control was a big problem in the TI groups where it was blatantly obvious, but in more normal groups it's just called capitalism not mind control because it isn't as blatantly life destroying. it is still life destroying. [one person i met was handling their broken vehicle by putting new fluids into it constant-- ---- anyway should i um buy the book i want to buy???? i've bought a lot of things today (.... ---- i got a PO box because i was excited to do things today and had been planning to for some time. i've also been planning to buy this book!! it's hard to do a workbook on an ebook but couldn't i just use the ebook? i think i have the ebook on vitalsource and on uhhh uhhhh kindle. and i haven't ripped it. (i sohuld probably rip it :S :S :S :S -- -- --- it's $70-$80 dollars it says, to buy the paperback book straight from the author's website. sorry. to buy _three_ copies of the paperback book straight form the author's website. two to give away (i want to give more copies away!!) (i haven't even read it!!!) [in the book club which usually whizzes through books 1/1-2months (while i read like only a few pages in that time) they paused and are just poking at this book -- (because -- ] --- !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i think it makes sense to get 1 copy at least. the reason is that it's a book where you can get really confused looking at the book because it is like "here is nurturing path to healing the trauma that tries to kill you when you try to heal it" and that's really confusing and scary (i've only read a few pages, but others report this experience develops and it was written assuming it was physical. for exmaple, one of the proposed grounding techniques for taking it slowly, is to color in the nice pictures in the book. the pictures are nice and help so much. words have a way of kind of yanking the reader into them, which can be hard when there are triggers all over nearby -- anyway it's way more confusing, when dissociated and trancing to do a book or whatever, to have it tell you to color in the pictures when it is an ebook. thi--- :) but they do sell an ebook. in the group people would show their physical books, i wouldn't know why, each person seemed to have gotten the physical book, did i miss something? i had the ebook like i usually do;;; then when i got to the color-it-in part the amount of sense thi[ --- ------- - - ----- the book club is just informal if i wanted somebodyt o buy me the book it would be like a request thing., the people running it are also recovering :) - honestly i am so used to think of myself as having more financial capacity than other homeless people that i ---- [oops they aren't homeless, err, maybe some of them? haven't asked --- 2015 ["how confusing! these r--"[confusing things u say]] 2015 so maybe a secre--- 2015