coffee shop goer who uploaded mailing list visits pet shop

pet shop owner has strange shelf-mushroom-like growth on head, with antennae and tendrils that go into scalp and face

visitor: “what’s a good pet to buy?”

pet shop owner (with growth on head, grinning strongly): “how about a brain-eating parasite?”

visitor (looking around at shelves): “i’m not sure, are brain eating parasites fun?”

visitor leans down to look at something that looks a little bit like a chubby snake with legs

pet shop owner leans down pointedly on their counter with meaningful body language that gets visitor to look back toward them

pet shop owner (still grinning hugely): “look, the brain eating parasite stimulates complete euphoria in the owner as it eats their brain. you definitely want one of these.”

particles of matter the same color as the growth on the head of the pet shop owner, spray out of their mouth as they talk

visitor runs out of the pet shop and slams the door.

visitor (to pedestrian): “don’t go in that pet shop!”

pedestrian (about to enter pet shop, looking at visitor): “hmm?”

pedestrian enters pet shop

another shopper leaves the pet shop. they are grinning hugely as they return satisfied to their vehicle. they have an extraterrestrial fungus growing out of their head.