goal:
- hold SAFETY, EXCITEMENT, and HAPPINESS while pursuing a behavior gently and intentionally, like wim hof with cold water
- keep duration very short at start, and journal
- associate with food and reward with food and candy

3/24
2
2024-05-31 0846 mdtish
3 day 1 1211 1
try 4 day 1 before 1603 count 1
try 6 day 2 before 0716 count 1
#7 day 2 0953 count 1
#8 day 2 1031 count 1
#9 day 2 1507 count 1
#10 day 2 1845 count 1
11. day 2 1905 ct 1
12. day 2 1958 ct 1
13. day 3 1323 ct 1
14. day 3 1528 ct 1
15. dy 3 1822 ct 1
16, dy 3 2232 ct 1
17. dy 4 0623 ct 1
18. dy 4 1241 ct 1
partial wrap. humus getting older.
thinking on value of doing something ctivr right after the feeling. like this would help keep the feeling useful.
19. dy 4 1821 ct 1
wrap, then maybe nuts
as i intend the feelings more they change a little, sadly, something for me to think about, but maybe the intention is more important than the experience. some worry writing this could worsen things.
20. dy 5 0656 ct 1
two peppermints, got up, might have nuts and do videogame
thinking food draw is bigger if i don’t eat much night before
was thinking this morning how the choice to try this feels separate from doing it.
one of my things is actually choosing to do something, unpleasant to have choices change and move on own.
so we were thinking maybe try to do earlier and more readily,
but also could make hard, those choice influences are strong
still feels really hard to do, feeling feeds back a little with amnesia and confusion, but am quite able to do! so still excited about potential of success here
we have a lot of worry around discussion of choice influences or something near :s but maybe videogame will dissociate
some of us are thinking some of the difficulty degree relates to things from day prior, maybe could be good to leave a little space sometimes
have an appointment tomorrow morning
feeling more capable in general always wonderful
some worry, some of the things i typed feel like they can really impact how this goes just typing them :s
thinking of taking a lot of space, maybe finding more candy