I've been sleeping mostly outdoors for 6 or 7 days now and I am very thankful for this.
I have bell's palsy (a severe problem with transmitting signals to facial muscles on one side of the face) and my right eye doesn't close all the way. It has been so nice to be falling asleep, but to have my right eye open from the bell's palsy and see that the woods is around me as I sleep. I always want to know this. It is so nice. A morning or two ago I woke up and there were mosquitos all around me and I didn't care at all. It was such a wonderful relief. I'm ordering two tarps so I can set up more spaces to work or sleep in without getting rained on, as I figure things out. I've been feeling much much less [terrified] when I imagine or pursue organizing my things a little to have my truck be drivable and livable again. It's very inspiring, how I responded to writing by changing my behavior, and I've been thinking a little bit, just a little, of other tasks. I'm very confused but I know I need to be able to live outdoors to use my existing life plans in ways that work. And I need to be able to demonstrate that I can take care of myself outdoors to have future care workers let me stay there as my repeatedly undiagnosed condition deteriorates.