Well, summer is here, and I've just come off > two weeks without a day off, so, I thought Itake this wonderful day, and use it like "normal" people might. You know, a nice breakfast with my wife somewhere, maybe a little casino time. The standard speil. But today turned out to be George Orwell Day instead. Submitted for your inevitable nodding of heads, and grumbling of "well, of course! What did you expect!" replies. Breakfast was kind of cool actually - thanks for asking. We trotted off to the local Ameristar casino's Open Trough, er, "Buffet". The food was universally overcooked, sometimes to the point of knife-resistance, but the great dessert bar more than made up for it. And it's relatively inexpensive. Recommended for when lots of food at a low price is all you care about. Not recommended for impressing anyone with your gastronomic knowledge ;-) After breakfast however, we decided to spend some time, and likely the ~300.00 we had on us, at their casino. Mind you, this may be the first time I've been to *this* casino, but it's nowhere *near* my first time in *any* casino. This is far, far, FAR from the norms I'm used to. Like good little state-sponsored-units, we stood in line for a few minutes, waiting to show our ID and begin our excersize in negative economics. When our turn came, however, I presented my ID, and was met with a blank stare. She looked at the ID. She looked at me. Back to the ID. I'm getting ready for the SWAT team to make their entrance at this point. "Sir, Where's your Amerstar Winners Card"? "Huh?" "Don't you have a Winners Card?" "I don't do loyalty cards. Thank you for thinking of me though." "Sir, you can't get in without a Winners Card" So much for a day at the casino. Thank you Ameristar! You saved me about $300.00 today. For those of you who are wondering, yes, you need detailed ID to get one of their loyalty cards. And while I wasn't able to get in to verify what I saw standing in line, it looks like they track you table by table with these cards. So, being $300.00 richer, and having worked for over two weeks without a break, *and* being 250 miles over my oil-change limit, I figured, aw, you know what I figured! Now, let me start off with some background here. I've gone to the same mechanic for almost 6 years now - for tires, oil, you name it. The only thing he doesn't get is the brakes, and then only cause my Subaru has some kind of brakes-from-hell that even he says can't be serviced safely without going to the dealer. This mechanic, who runs the shop for the local Dobb's chain, is great. Never had a problem. Never had to show ID either. Doesn't care if Telecheck likes me or not, he just takes the money, and gets my business. And he gets a *lot* of it. His business is thriving, and he recently added 4 new bays to his shop, and started taking Sundays off - hence, my problem. So, we took the scenic route home, figuring there would have to be a oilchange shop somewhere along the way. And there were several. The first two were closed, but finally, we found a JiffyLube open and waiting. With two bays. And no line (baaaaddd sign on a wonderful day like this). But I *need* the damn oil change, so in we go. "Good Afternoon Sir. What can we help you with today?" "Hi. Oil change please. Synthetic blend please. No extras, just an oil change" "Sure, leave the keys in the car, and step over to the counter, and John will be right with you". When I got out of the car, the kid who was going to do the actual work wanted to know if I had a loyalty card he could punch/swipe/whatever. Nope. "Well sir, just give me your name and address, and I'll get you a card". "Thanks, but I don't want a card." "They're absolutely free sir!" "I know. Thanks, but I don't want a card" "I can't change your oil without a card" "You're kidding. Aren't you?" "Sir, I need a card." "John Smith. 123 Anywhere Street. Anycity, Arkasas. 12345". "Phone?" I almost died laughing when he asked. I mean, where's Monty Python? Behind the storage shed? "314-555-1234" "Thank you sir. If you care to have a seat in the waiting room, we'll call you when it's ready. Into the waiting room we go. With the little 8 inch TV mounted 12 feet in the air, where nobody can actually see it, even though we have to listen to it [at warp-volume]. There's some super overacted action-drama going on, lot's of shooting, a car chase, and a guy jumping into an airplane which is taking off - he jumped from a moving car to the plane - allin the ten minutes we were waiting. Thank god I threw out the television in '90. Finally, a guy comes out from the shop. "Sir, if you'll follow me, we can go over your car for a minute." This is the upsell - I can just see it coming. Wipers? Air filter? We walk over to a monitor sitting in this big red box made up to look like a diagnostic center. It's really just a sales terminal in a big red box, sporting some pretty pictures of the products this guy is trying to talk you into buying. "Sir, would you like some engine cleaner? You should have it once a year." "No, I just want the oil change. no wipers. No engine cleaners. Nothing but an oil change" "Sir. I'm just doing my job - I have to ask you all these questions, since I can't check you out and close out your ticket without asking." Yes, he is an automaton. He just can't take a blanket "no" and punch that into each request, so we went down the whole list of radiator flushes, transmission fluid checks and replacements, hoses, filters, etc. Finally, *thankfully*, we're done: he tells me I can go to the register to pay. "Sir. The total comes to $46.00". As he says this, he notices that the screen hasn't filled in my name, address, etc., from the swipe of the loyalty card. "Sir, I need your last name." "Terranson." "Your first name?" "Whatever makes you happy. Pick one." He looks lost. So lost. "John?" "That's a nice name. Use it." "Address?" "123 Anywhere St." He dutifully types it in... "City?" "Pick one." We wait. He looks at me waiting, looking even more lost and confused. Finally, I can take it no more, and I blurt out an answer, hoping beyond hope that he'll "get it". "New Caledonia." "State?" "Mexico." "Phone?" "123-555-1234" "Sir, would you like a Jiffy Card for next time, so you won't have to wait while we get this information? Oh god... So I have seen two separate businesses today who are just shooting themselves in the head over the acquisition of data in the face of obvious refusal. While the Jiffy Lube is the more obscene example from a bang-for-the-buck perspective, the casino was (for me) the real shocker: casinos have, from day one, been very careful to protect privacy. You ever try to bring in a camera? Forget it! To have a casino turn me away for lack of a loyalty card strikes me as, wel, preposterous! I cannot [literally] give you hundreds of dollars, asking nothing in return but a chance to gaze longingly at the asses of the floor wait staff, without divulging my entire pedigree? Have we, as a society, completely lost all touch with reality??? Those poor kids at the Jiffy Lube - obviously they *have* to get this data for the corporate office, but they too exhibit an amazing amount of programming here. Not *one* of them had enough of a clear head to simply fill in "refused", or "John Smith" on his own. We have taken a real national resource, our youth, and trained them to act as mindless droids, devoid of even the minimum reasoning powers possessed by small insects, and I am, inexplicably, astounded. I am what anyone with an IQ of 12 or higher would call a hard core cynic. But even I am surprised. Appalled even. And oddly embarrassed to find that things are not as bad as I constantly claim, but they are *worse* - MUCH worse than that. They are... I don't *know* what they are - but whatever it is, it is truly fucking evil... -- Yours, J.A. Terranson sysadmin@mfn.org "Every living thing dies alone." Donnie Darko