Birthdays;Mel gibson,robert loggia and dabney coleman.Future Gnu's February 4, 2002 An 86 year-old Amish woman on a Florida to Ohio flight detonates a bomb in pants disguised as battery operated light-up "Viva Las Vegas!" panties. The last video image from black box shows her knocking over stewardess and tearing off dress before detonating explosive. All passengers on board are killed. 25 people on the ground are also killed by falling debris. As a result, all passengers are required to remove their undergarments for inspection in makeshift, screened rooms. Flights are delayed for up to 3 days as lines of irritated passengers wait to be stripped naked by convicted felons (it is discovered that 89% of airport security employees are ex-cons and parolees). February 13, 2002 While passengers are still being strip searched in American airports, a man on United flight 302 from Philadelphia to New York belly flops in the center isle, setting off the nitro-glycerine that his clothes were later found to be soaked in. In a move that outrages the few surviving civil rights organizations, FAA requires all passengers fly in the nude and forgo any in-flight snacks as FBI demonstrates on live TV how a peanut can be used to kill a grown man. June 3, 2002 While Bush is on live TV proclaiming his success in clearing the world of terrorism (UN and US intervened in Indo-Pakistani conflict and accidentally dumped large Anthrax stockpiles and nuclear weapons on all of the Middle East. It was labeled "colateral damage") a woman detonates a tube of explosives concealed in her anal cavity. 300 people on board are killed as well as 263 on ground as wreckage rained down on a Shriner's parade in Utah. All fliers are now required to submit to a body cavity search before boarding plane. July 4, 2002 A naked couple on Alaskan Airlines Flight 65 uses a two-in-one explosive compound to destroy the plane. The man had clear, odorless coating of one chemical on penis, and the woman had second chemical douche before boarding the plane. Flight footage shows couple engaging in intercourse, successfully combining two benign chemicals and forming one super explosive chemical that equaled the power of 5,000 pounds of TNT. Passengers are now required to wear an electronic chastity belt that dissolves the wearer's genitals with a highly corrosive acid at the first signs of arousal.