After giving careful consideration to the amount of press coverage dedicated to the bombing of the Oklahoma City Federal Building, and judging the proportion of outrage over the deaths of the children in the daycare center compared to the amount of outrage over the remaining victims, I have come to the conclusion that in the interests of saving lives terrorists and psychos should be encouraged to murder the youngest children possible. While my studies are preliminary, they indicate that terroists and madmen would only have to kill half as many people to achieve comparable results in the arena of publicity and public attention if they were to confine their slaughter to young children. This figure declines further if the children are white, and even further yet if they are cute. By promoting cute young white children as the target of preference for terroists and crazy people, we could save innumerable lives each and every year. Next Week: The role of Senior Citizens in slow check-out lines.