At 12:24 PM 8/21/97 -0600, Tim G. May BFD wrote:
Tim G. May *DID*NOT* write: "Imitation is the sincerest form of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder." -----------------------------------------------------------------------
"I am your robot slave. Your whim is my obsessive compulsion." Bill Gates dies. He meets Peter at the Pearly Gates, and Peter gives Bill the option of going to Heaven or Hell. Bill asks if he can see what his options are, and Peter offers to show Bill around Heaven and Hell, so Bill can see which he likes better. As Bill tours Heaven, he sees nice houses and meets friendly people, but when he gets to Hell, he sees green fields dotted with patches of trees, placid streams, and attractive women who are not-so-subtly lusting after his body. After the tour is over, Bill decides that while Heaven is nice, maybe Hell is just a little bit nicer, so Peter sends Bill off to Hell. Three days later, Peter decides to go see how Bill is making out in Hell. He finds him in a dank, squalid dungeon, manacled to a post, with one demon using a cattle prod on his testicles, and a couple others slowly peeling pieces of his skin off with blowtorches and machetes, and then dousing him with concentrated salt water. Bill is furious. "You bastard! What you showed me was nothing like this!" Peter replies, "I'm truly sorry. I didn't mean to deceive you. I just showed you the demo." On their wedding night, Bill's wife finally realized where Bill got the inspiration for his company name. Jonathan Wienke What part of "the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed" is too hard to understand? (From 2nd Amendment, U.S. Constitution) PGP 2.6.2 RSA Key Fingerprint: 7484 2FB7 7588 ACD1 3A8F 778A 7407 2928 DSS/D-H Key Fingerprint: 3312 6597 8258 9A9E D9FA 4878 C245 D245 EAA7 0DCC Public keys available at pgpkeys.mit.edu. PGP encrypted e-mail preferred. US/Canadian Windows 95/NT or Mac users: Get Eudora Light + PGP 5.0 for free at http://www.eudora.com/eudoralight/ Get PGP 5.0 for free at http://bs.mit.edu:8001/pgp-form.html Commercial version of PGP 5.0 and related products at http://www.pgp.com Eudora + PGP = Free, Convenient Communication Privacy Go postal! Write your mommy a letter!