For a Dignified and Effective Demonstration

17 Dec 2003

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- From an anonymous leaflet, London, early 1980s.

	     FOR A DIGNIFIED AND EFFECTIVE DEMONSTRATION

    Brought to you by the ALL-LONDON UNITED ALLIANCE OF SOCIALIST
CAUCUSES to whom teh following are signatories: G.L.C., London Labour
Party, T.U.C., S.W.P., W.R.P., I.M.G., C.N.D., Ecology Party, Y.C.L.,
and B.F.

We welcome everyone to today's demonstration, which we hope will be
amongst the biggest London has seen for many years.  We are confident
that the vast majority of you will keep intact your dignity.  A
disciplined rally is essential if we are to avoid discrediting
ourselves in the eyes of the public and losing the approval of the
police.  We want to give the media no reason to condemn our campaign
by pointing to any over-imaginative acts.  To this end, we call on
everyone to obey the dictates of the stewards who will be found
alongside the police.  They will be acting in your interests.  They
are sensible people - please be sensible with them.  Beware of
troublemakers - some may be in the crowd with you.  If you see any do
not hesitate to summon stewards or the police, who, we must remember,
are our brothers in work.  Comrades!  Even in a socialist society we
shall still need Specialists-In-Order to combat hooligans and
deviants.  While it's true that nowadays the police are occasionally
over-zealous in their protection of privilege, property, and the
violence of the world market, the best way of dealing with this is by
demanding public accountability through elected local government or
some other representation of submissive community.  In the meantime we
should recognize that they will only listen to our complaints if we
conduct ourselves in the correct manner.

			 RESPECT FOR THE DEAD

    Our tactics are those to which the greatest number can conform
with the least difficulty.  They require no more than your presence
and a minimum of participation.  All that we ask is that you recreate
the conditions of your work.  Remember!  It's numbers that count; the
boredom you feel is also imposed by the demo on everyone else.  Each
demonstrator must be equivalent to and replaceable by any other.  Just
like our old friend, the commodity.  Please bear in mind that love and
marriage go together like a horse and carriage, OK?

    We therefore ask you to comply with the following simple rules:

1. Exactly one hundred to a line, each rank to be one yard clear of
   the line in front.  No lounging please.
2. Wait for the initiative of the official loud-speakers before
   repeating the correct slogans, always recognisable by their format.
   For example: "X - IN! . . . Y - OUT!" or "WHAT DO WE WANT? -
   SOMETHING! . . . WHEN DO WE WANT IT? - WHENEVER YOU GET AROUND TO
   GIVING IT TO US!".  Kindly check that all Extra-Parliamentary
   slogans recognize the ultimate sovereignty of Parliament.  If you
   have any doubts, consult our easy-to-read list of DEMONSTRATION
   SLOGANS DO'S & DON'TS: -

CHANT                                     DO NOT CHANT
Cheap Fares Now!             NOT          Helicopters on Demand!
Victory to Fares Fight!      NOT          Total Contestation!
No Return to the 30's!       NOT          No Adventure for the '80s!
Slogans are jolly good fun!  NOT          Bollocks to Demands of our Enemies!
Baaaaaaaaaaaaaa!             NOT          Riot for Romance!

3. The left-hand side of the rally has been designated a 'No Smoking'
   area.  Demonstrators are respectfully asked to comply with this
   request.
4. If you see any impatient extremists please inform us immediately.
   They are easily distinguishable by the following kinds of sectarian
   individualism:
   a) Inventing unofficial slogans such as "Kenny is a Cop!", "Neither
   Left, Right, nor Centre!"  or "Revolution is the Festival of the
   Depressed!" or some other aggressive utopian rubbish.
   b) Departing from the prescribed site of the demo for the purpose
   of indulging in manual waltzes through shop windows and the wilful
   destruction of saleable goods.  Take care to note that Piccadilly,
   offering gold-drenched shops and fine vistas of the commodity, is a
   holiday of sheer temptation you should avoid.
   c) Making unauthorised alterations to luxury cars.
   d) Using banner poles in an extravagantly exhuberant manner.
   e) Smoking excessively long cigarettes or 'joints'.
   f) Drinking looted alcohol.

			 COORDINATED FEROCITY

   g) Suggesting that demonstrators should band together in groups of
   fifty or more in order to spread disruption of traffic as widely as
   possible.  For example, by the continuous use of zebra crossings,
   standing around chatting in the middle of the road or arranging
   obstacles to prevent the free flow of carbon monoxide, lead, cop
   cars, and tension-producing noises through our streets.
   h) Any clever, erotic, or playful expression of individual or group
   initiative.

			  CLOCKWORK FUTILITY

5. During the rally you are urged to clap your favourite speakers.
   Please confine your enthusiasm to 15 secs per point made in the
   middle of a pseech and a maximum of 30 secs at the end of one.
   Please do not interrupt with shouts of "BORING"!
6. Always remember to smile at the press cameras and adopt a suitably
   militant stance even when you feel pissed off with the whole
   business.
7. If you are uncertain whether a particular mode of behaviour is
   orderly or not, just do what everybody else is doing.  Should any
   unconventional urges remain do not hesitate to discuss them with
   one of our stewards.  They will be only too pleased to refer you to
   the appropriate specialist, whether G.P. or S.W.P.
8. At the end of the demo please do not dawdle.  Failure to make your
   way home quickly could result in you missing the sight of yourself
   on TV.

This leaflet is brought to you courtesy of the ALL-LONDON UNITED
ALLIANCE OF SOCIALIST CAUCUSES.

The following have refused to sign this leaflet:

The vandals of St. Saviours Primary School who refused to accept their
discipline quietly and who wrecked their compuslory prison, causing a
sobbing teacher to lament "These youngsters have hardly left their
cradles, but they are threatening to take over the school."

The rioters at Bydgoszcz Prison in Poland who fought Communist Party
hacks, State Police, and Solidarity union officials, all allied in
defence of the walls of the prison against the townspeople who were
helping prisoners escape.

The ASLEF traindrivers who avoid wage slavery as much as possible,
preferring dancing and drinking to sacrificing themslves to a job
which mainly involves transporting other slaves so that they may
perpetuate the futility of it all.

The black and white joyriding youth of Clapham who used CB radios for
the fun of organising efficient looting.

The Deptford New Cross Marchers of a year ago who in anger and
audacity broke away from the march in order to re-distribute weatlh in
the Bond Street area.

The Toxteth and Southall youths who shouted down Left Labour activists
patronising enough to characterize the riots as "understandable but
inexcusable".

The truckdrivers of Cleveland, USA, who took over the local
distribution of food, medicine, and other necessities, by themselves
and without mediation, for over 3 weeks.

For a Dignified and Effective Demonstration

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