Date: Fri, 12 Dec 1997 09:06:22 -0600 (CST) To: Year2000.com-Announcement-List@year2000.com From: Year2000_Outbound_Mail_See_Below@year2000.com Subject: Y2K ANNOUNCE>> If I were President/Dictator Sender: owner-year2000-announce@year2000.com
Last month Peter de Jager announced a contest to submit suggestions about what you would do about the year 2000 problem if you were president (of any country) for a day. Peter also suggested that humorous entries be submitted with the title "If I were supreme dictator!" Below you will find the winning entries along with some of the honorable mentions. --Cliff Kurtzman
-------------------------------------------------------- Greetings folks,
The "If I were President" contest winner (out of 99 entries) is Nancy L. Osterhaus. The "If I were Dictator" contest winner (out of 20 entries) is Richard Kennard. You will find both entries below, along with a number of the honorable mentions.
Contests are tough... I find a 'winner' out of the many good and excellent submissions to always come down to a handful of choices... and choosing at that point is honestly a random event. It is seldom a winner is a 'certain' winner. Nancy... you won... and the others? several came very close and two others were a toss up.
The "If I were Dictator" entries were even tougher to judge. Especially since after awhile... some were beginning to make sense!!! (I need to get a life!) Sad thing is... some of these are considered as serious suggestions by some of the people I've spoken with over the years.
I can only do my best... Peter de Jager, pdejager@year2000.com ========================================================
IF I WERE PRESIDENT ===================
Winning Entry:
From: "Nancy L. Osterhaus" To: pdejager@year2000.com Date: Tue, 21 Oct 1997 16:55:37 -0500 Subject: If I were President
Action Items:
1. Communication to the world the magnitude of the problem, the real issues, the real impact
This is a denial project. Most people do not understand the impact of the year 2000 on them.. on their lifestyle, the way they do business, and their health and future. I work in a large company that has a strong awareness campaign, but during my "time off" talk to local businesses, hospitals, etc. They are very unaware of the issues. If the grand Y2K world-wide project, is to succeed, we need to get past the first phase .... Communication & Commitment. The president could enable this by holding a Town Meeting with a panel of experts to explain the problem, impact, solution, and government plans for compliance.
2. Commitment to prioritize and repair of what he's responsible for (Government systems, banking, infrastructure, etc.)
Publishing a plan to show people that this is a serious issue, and the government has taken the step of prioritizing their systems and developed a plan to ensure compliance. Publish the individual department plans, lessons learned, etc.
3. Publicly report on the progress of government Y2K projects on a regular basis (at least quarterly)
Report to the nation and to the world on the progress of year 2000 compliance in the government sector. By providing regular updates to the nation we will gain increased awareness of the issues and in addition we can hold our government accountable for their projects and progress towards compliance.
Nancy
==========================================================================
And here are a selection of other suggestions: Some of the good ones, most of the great ones and a handful of ringers. You decide which is which. Yours truly, Peter.
From: "Dyer, Wayne"
1. Request congress to modify tax code The costs of a company making corrections for Year 2000 should be considered an investment in the future - therefore they should be treated favorably at tax time. Everything possible should be done to encourage companies to deal with the problem - and tax policy is the key way to influence business decisions.
2. Limit year 2000 liability The year 2000 problem was caused by "standard practices" in the software industry. No company should have to worry about mega lawsuits because of year 2000. Companies can be held accountable for the quality of their products, but absolutely nothing will be gained by shareholder suits against companies merely because they didn't start early enough to fully correct the problem
3. Change Social Security earnings limits Retired programmers should be encouraged to "come out" of retirement to work on year 2000. Because social security benefits are reduced for each dollar earned above a set limit, many will probably not want to work. This limit should be waived for people working on YR2K. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Kevin Whelan
1. Require Y2K preparedness report from all organizations. Require all organizations to file a standard report that would be available via Internet on their Y2K preparedness status.
2. All software/hardware vendors publish Y2K info on Internet. Require all manufacturers and software vendors to publish by specific model and/or version the Y2K compliance status of each of their products in use, to be viewable on the Internet.
3. Monthly Y2K TV program during prime time. The government will sponsor an hour Y2K awareness TV program monthly during prime time from 1998 until it's over.
Kevin ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Iain MacKenzie
1. Raise awareness. Real awareness. Tell the people that this is a *real* problem, on *all* makes, models, types of computer. Tell them that *everything* should be checked. Explain *why*. Explain the difference between 'is capable of storing' and 'is actually populated with' and the connection this has to 2-digit data entry, for example.
2. Explain what every computer-owner should be doing. Tell them what they need to do to check and resolve their own problems. This is the 'facts and data' part of the message.
3. Talk about scheduling and panic. There *is* time to fix the problem. (There *has* to be, the time is fixed. We (Y2k folk) will have to vary our solution as time goes by). If all companies establish a plan and follow it we will all end up with a h*** of a party on 31/12/1999 but no major problems. A sort of 'Your *Company* Needs YOU' message. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Mau, Michelle"
IF I WERE A PRESIDENT.. 1. Make Giants Pay Make the major computer giants - SUN, IBM, MICROSOFT, SAP, ORACLE, etc, to contribute $1 billion each for each year until the year 2001 to fund the awareness campaign of the y2k. The idea is to highlight the criticality side of y2k which is a business problem - not just an IT problem. Everyone from floor operations right through to the middle management up to the senior management should be aware of this bug and its impact to the running of the business. School children should also have some idea what this is all about as they are our growing IT customers. Most of them are already familiar with the Internet and computer games. It is time for IT to lift its game and include everyone on y2k - equity through IT is great to break down the social barriers and the barriers of haves and haves-not.
2. TAX Incentives Have an incentive program for SMEs (Small and Medium sized enterprises) to have at least 70 percent tax deductions for their expenses in managing and fixing y2k bug before Dec 31, 1999. After Dec 31, 1999, the tax deduction will be lowered to 30 percent so that these organisations will be motivated to start their y2k project now than later to make such claims from their tax. This is already happening in Singapore. It will be great if developed nations like Australia could bring this policy into effect immediately rather than leaving it a bit too late. SMEs are the backbone of the industries in this country and they should be assisted and motivated to launch their y2k project. y2k compliance definition and testing tools should be made available to everyone via the NET, brochures and awareness campaign which I have already mentioned. Perhaps the example set by our Victoria Premier Jeff Kennett in providing jobs to the unemployed to test software compliancy with y2k using a set of standard tools should be applauded.
3. Product Compliance Info through the NET Use the web to publicise which products are y2k compliant. If these products are not yet compliant, where do users get more updated info and when will these products be compliant? Which version or model? What course of action is recommended to users - retire, replace or risk it? What about products which have embedded technology that may have impact on the organisation? ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Dyer, Wayne"
1. Request congress to modify tax code The costs of a company making corrections for Year 2000 should be considered an investment in the future - therefore they should be treated favorably at tax time. Everything possible should be done to encourage companies to deal with the problem - and tax policy is the key way to influence business decisions.
2. Limit year 2000 liability The year 2000 problem was caused by "standard practices" in the software industry. No company should have to worry about mega lawsuits because of year 2000. Companies can be held accountable for the quality of their products, but absolutely nothing will be gained by shareholder suits against companies merely because they didn't start early enough to fully correct the problem
3. Change Social Security earnings limits Retired programmers should be encouraged to "come out" of retirement to work on year 2000. Because social security benefits are reduced for each dollar earned above a set limit, many will probably not want to work. This limit should be waived for people working on YR2K. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Noel Goyette
1. Fire the head (not the CIO) of agencies which have not made real progress now. Time is a lever which is rapidly getting shorter, and agencies are laying this problem on the CIOs without resources.
2. Get the SEC to investigate the real Y2K project status of industry, starting with the embedded systems in the utilities.
3. Reconsitute the Continuity of Operations Plans of the federal government, which have been abandonded and unfunded as a result of the end of the cold war. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Joe Allegra"
1. Convene a meeting for a couple of days in Washington DC with Government and Business Leaders to discuss this issue. I would prep the meeting by coming up with a list of 10 questions that CEOs need to ask themselves. For example: Do you a credible plan to become Year 2000 compliant? How big is this IT project relative to other IT projects? Has your IT staff ever attempted a project of this size? What is the track record of your IT department in completing large projects on time? If you lost all of your computer systems, what would be the impact to your business. etc. etc. I would also bring in people that could document through real live experiences how big the project really is.
Having a Washington based meeting convened by the President would get the media into this in a big way.
2. I would convene a high level group to monitor and report monthly on the compliance activities of the key sectors of the economy. Alan Greenspan to monitor the banking system; others to monitor transportation, power, telecommunications.
3. I would ask the Group of 7 (or is it 8) countries to convene a special meeting to discuss this issue at the president/prime minister level. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Eugene Hatting
1) Institute legislation that ALL government institutions must have started taking adequate steps by December 1997, in order to address the year 2000 problem.
2) Institute legislation that all large non-governmental companies/corporations who make a positive contribution towards the economy, must have started taking adequate steps by December 1997, in order to address the year 2000 problem.
Hefty penalties and possible criminal prosecutions could follow if the above institutions do not abide by these rulings.
3) I would institute certain tax benefits or other insensitives to those companies who have taken adequate steps to address the problem and/or who have obtained year 2000 compliance (as defined by my governmental department) by date x. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Yvonne Rediger
1. Tax break/incentive program for companies that are compliant by a specific date. The companies would have to prove compliancy by a set of citeria, put in place by a board, and that board would award #2.
2. A CSA approved Logo. The Logo could be placed on their products and displayed on advertising etc. proclaiming them Year 2000 Compliant. Thus selling insurance that their company will be around in the coming years. Right now any company can make that claim.
3. Make government departments set specific delines for their own compliancy and stick to them. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Dr. Ibrahim El-Miligi
a) Set up a presidential working group (please not a committee) to over see that :- * All government and semi-government organizations have or set up a plan and initiated action to be Y2K compliant. If not then some penalties should be levied (including the firing of some heads) * Should report to me regularly in special meeting of cabinet ministers.
b) Media awareness! Medial will be instructed to focus on the Y2K problem with interviews, discussion groups, research programs, case studies .. etc. I noticed in my country that there is a miserable state of media awareness!!
c) I will sponsor conferences and other forums to give the right perspective to the public of the seriousness of the problem. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Rick Mol
The government should not be in the business decision business. The year 2000 issue is basically an issue for the various companies to solve themselves.
Historically, when government gets involved in making these types of decisions, it doesn't do near as good of a job as the free market. What we would end up with is a series of legislative fiats that are made by people that have no concept of the problem. They seem to have this idea that "we can pass a law and fix this". What will happen is that this will cost the industry money and add more requirements. So, if I were President, I'd get out of the they way and let industry solve it themselves. They will do a MUCH better job than legislation will. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Barry Blauer
1. Appoint a leader: Choose a project leader to direct a project to make the entire government (our enterprise) compliant for the Year2000. Give this person authority to marshall the resources, establish the plan, and direct the effort.
2. Issue the challenge: Request every direct report to deliver a complete plan of handling the Year2000 problems within his/her organization, including resource requirements, Require prioritization from each group, identifying mission-critical systems which would cause disasters if they were allowed to fail. The plan needs to include a completion date of 12/31/1998 for all renovation.
3. Inform the customers: Develop a mechanism to report to the public the regular progress of the project, within national security boundaries. Challenge private industry to follow our lead, to ensure the entire country will be prepared when the clock rolls over. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: MATTHEW CHAPMAN
1) Ensure that there was a "Year 2000 Czar" in charge of Government compliancy. This position/person would be chartered with first establishing the state of where the Federal Government stands as a whole in the scope of making the government systems Y2K compliant. The fist "charter" of this Czar, would be to make sure the military is at the head of the list, and that all possible scenarios are being investigated, analyzed, and ultimately made to be compliant.
2) I would personally address my fellow world leaders with the same charge, for them to actively pursue this issue as a "top" priority, once again with initial focus on their weapons stockpiles and missile silos.
3) I would provide periodic updates to the nation, as to the status of the country as a whole. This would acknowledge the Y2K issue as one of importance, that should not be ignored or postponed any longer. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Ric Kelperis
1) Recognize the importance of resource continuity, and waive taxes for all I/S employees that maintain their current employment. This would not only incent people to stay where they are, but to perform well also.
2) Assign a United States Year 2000 Secretary
3) Require a public quarterly status report from all departments of government.
4) Require independent certification for all life threatening situations, such as air traffic controlling software, etc. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "William Baker"
1. Assess the outcome which is most predictable, given the actions in motion in government and the private sector. Charter a highly visible and media exposed team to report this assessment by Q1 1998.
2. Pass legislation limiting legal and liability ramifications of non-compliant systems, try to avoid a disaster in the courts, frivolous law suits, and the destruction of the US economy by lawyers.
3. Establish a SWAT team ( or teams ) which can be directed at the most serious problems of internal and interfacing conversion and education issues within pinpointed Federal government " hot spots." ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: nara
Rename the year after 1999 as 199A (A for 10 in hex):
Call an international conference of all world leaders (UN would have served a useful purpose) and rename the year after 1999 as 199A.
Declare 'A' as a character as well as a integer in all new programs.
This would at least buy us some time and name the year after 199A as 2000. We can buy more time by renaming the following year as 199B and so on... ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: John Austin
1. Let the public know. The American public is still mostly unaware that there is a problem. The president needs to let the American public know that everyone may have problems in 2000 or even before--and that it might be your bank, gas station, power company, etc. that might fail.
2. Wake the US government up. Many agencies still have not got a workable Year 2000 plan. Chief concerns are the Defense Department and the IRS (which finds itself asking for more and more money). While more attention is being paid to the latter, with budget crunches we are likely to come a cropper on 1 January 2000 (or later).
3. Sell Y2K Budget to Congress. To do all this will cost many many dollars. A chief issue will of course be to get these increased budgets for these agencies through this Congress, which wants to cut deficits. A sales job showing that money spent now will save more later is needed. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Vernon K. Jacobs"
(1) begin the development of a backup system to substitute a national sales tax (either temporary or permanent) to secure government revenues when the IRS computer systems stop working after 12/31/99,
(2) veto any legislation that will require added time and funds to be spent on computer systems to the extent that any new projects would compete with resources needed for the year-2000 efforts
(3) require an immediate study of all government agencies and activities that are not essential to the survival of the country and develop a plan to shut down the systems of those agencies or projects until all other agencies have become 2000-compliant. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Bruins, David "
First: I would request a press conference in the morning with representatives from both national news and computing periodicals. Representatives from companies that have successfully converted their software would be asked to attend and answer questions. The emphasis would NOT be on what COULD happen, but on what to do to fix it so NOTHING happens. Enough has been said on the potential problems and almost nothing has been said on how to fix it.
Second: I would request that any Government organization that is still running this effort as a development project to halt the "development cycle" and start identifying and fixing code. The point must be made clear that this is not a 'Development' project. This is a system bug. The process that is required to correct system bugs must be followed, not the development cycle. We are not developing anything new, we are fixing code that does not work.
Third: I would propose a bill that would require that all systems, that may cause the loss of human life due to a software or hardware failure due to the turn of the century, be certified by 12/01/1998. All identified systems would be published, monthly up to that date and weekly after that date, as being certified or not certified. Use of uncertified systems would be illegal after November 1999 attempted manslaughter. The number 1 criteria for certification would be that the system can be tested for what will happen at the turn of the century. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Rice, Bernie"
1. I'd use the bully pulpit. Encourage public not to panic but to be aware, and encourage the business community to pool efforts to address the problem, like they did with regard to High Definition Television. 2. Establish a national telephone tree among Fortune 500 companies to allow them to assist each other in the event of a crisis in any one organization. 3. Take this unprecedented opportunity to deliberately dismantle the IRS as we know it. If no one else does, Year-2000 complications undoubtedly will, and with no forethought at all. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Capers Jones
1) Suspend anti-trust regulations for all year 2000 repairs and encourage key industries to pool their year 2000 work. Key industries include banks, insurance, defense, telecommunications, airlines, public utilities, etc.
2) Have the IRS issue a public statement that they will not automatically come after taxpayers whose returns are messed up due to year 2000 errors. Since the IRS itself will probably not be compliant, this is the least they could do.
3) Have the OMB publish a weekly update on year 2000 status of all federal agencies, with contact information on all Y2K offices so that citizens who have problems will know who to deal with. This should start in January of 1999 if not earlier. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: "Dominic Ng"
1) Setting up the standard for the Y2K problem solution
Nowaday, the Y2K solutions between different consulting firms are different. If each systems are stand alone, well that's ok. However, they are communicating with each other through EDI or network, incompatibility between each system may worsen the situation. Therefore solution standard is very important in term of windowing or date format.
2) Asking the supervision from Federal Reserve department and Technology department
In the Y2K problem, the most suffering group would be financial institution because their business are highly depend on electronic exchange in term of date calculation. For this reason, Federal Reserve department and Technology department should supervise their Y2K projects meeting the deadline. The main aim is to avoid the crashdown of financial market.
3) Financial assistance for the poor companies in Y2K project
Y2K project is a expensive project especially for the old system because the skill is uncommon. Some small-sized or medium-size companies may not be able to prepare resource for Y2K project within a short period of time. Therefore government should provide financial assistance such as loan for the poor companies in Y2K project. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: (no name only e-mail address)
I would just ignore the whole year 2000 and leave it for the Republicans to deal with
I would raise taxes to help the government deal with the problem and redirect the tax revenue to my pet projects
I would assign the project to Hillary to set up a task force and raise public awareness and get them off my back about the other issues -------------------------------------------------------------------------
============================================================ ============================================================ ============================================================ ============================================================ ============================================================
IF I WERE DICTATOR: ===================
Here's richard winning entry. From: Richard Kennard Date: Thu, 23 Oct 1997 08:50:29 -0500
"If I were supreme dictator"
I'd give it to Hilary to fix.
============================================================
Honorable mentions:
From: "jtepley"
1) Declare martial law and appoint a Y2K Czar to triage government, industry, and company functions and systems.
2) Draft anyone with professional computer experience, leaving 50% at their current employer and using the other 50% to work on high priority (triaged) government, industry, and company systems. Shoot selected protesters as examples.
3) Pass and enforce a law that requires all citizens to "kiss their ass goodbye" every morning when they wake up until the year 2025. -----------------------------
From: "Dyer, Wayne"
1. Declare that year 2010 follows year 1999. Then declare that 1999 was really 2009, 1998 was really 2008, etc. etc. It would be much more efficient to just change all the dates in files without changing date logic. This would work in about 75% of the instances where companies only deal with a few years in the future or the past.
2. Change our current 7 day a week calendar to a 10 day a week calendar. That way nobody would know what days of the week dates fell on in the past, so nobody would care if date logic was fouled up!
3. Make anybody who screams about the imminent collapse of society on Jan 1, 2000 write 10,000,000 times "I will not try to incite panic for my own benefit anymore". -----------------------------
From: Brad_Balassaitis
1. Copyright the Phrase "Year 2000" The first thing I would do is copyright the phrase "Year 2000" so that I could charge royalties (or sue for infringement as the case may be) every time it is printed, spoken, or even thought of. (I'm supreme dictator, so I can copyright common words!) I would make a fortune (which I would keep in cash under my mattress, of course).
2. Collect the Royalties and Infringement Damages Next, I would assign the entire staff of the CIA to spend all of their time checking for copyright infringements, so that I could collect my rightful royalties and infringement damages.
3. Move to a Country that is Compliant! Finally, I would move myself, my family, and my fortune to the first country that is totally year 2000 compliant!!! Thus, I have (a) made a fortune because of the problem, (b) put no thought, stress, or effort into solving it, and (c) gone to a place where the problem is already taken care of! (How truly American of me!) -----------------------------
From: Eric de Katow
Plan-A: Hire Superman to rotate the earth backward, just like he did to save Lois Lane, except he will go a couple years back. Then he will be in charge of convincing the World of the magnitude of the Y2K problem and need for readiness.
Plan-B: Enact a law that will make the Year 2000 the Year 1900.
Plan-C: Become a lawyer. -----------------------------
From: Eugene
1) Have all calendars in America changed to tick over on 31 December 1999, to 1900 when the clock strikes 12:00. All other countries (trade partners) would then just have to fit in with this arrangement (In South Africa we have a saying: "Adapt or Die").
2) In case some companies forgot to change their calendars to the above ruling, these companies/individuals will be forced to do business with ONLY those who are not year 2000 compliant and will pay a penalty of $1 000 000,00 per day for every day they are not compliant.
3) If the above two rules are not feasible, I would use the satellites which Bill Gates planes to have put into space, to automatically download the latest Windows 2000 and Office 2000 software on all computers across America. A rule would then be implemented that everybody WILL be forced to use the Microsoft products. -----------------------------
From: Marilyn Nolin
I would declare that when the year rolls over to 2000, it would actually be 1900! Like any good politician, I would pass the buck to the next generations.
-----------------------------
From: Dr. I. El-Miligi
Dear Peter, As in many countries (first, second or third world) scapegoats are required to celebrate the turn of the centure. So, if I were a Zomba King, this is what I would do :-
a) Set up a royal commission headed by the most hated minister and assign to them to solve the year 2YK problem
b) Set up another royal commision to see that the first commission does NOT achieve its goals
c) Set up a court martial on the eve of the first day of the 21 first century to execute the responsible persons In this way, the blame is place somewhere the our good people will get rid the hated minister, Sorry, but the Y2K is not solved yet.
May our royal blessings be with you, -----------------------------
From: Herve Klein
i would first ban all computers in my country and replace all of them with chinese type abacuses.
second, it would create so many jobs that all economical crisis would disappear, giving all unemployed enough work for centuries : replacers of obsolete plastic computers by sweet wooden frames, manufacturers of modern automatic abacuses, finger assisted trainers, ...
third, wait for 1st january 2000 world crisis to sell (high price) my nation's knowledge to all other worldwide countries in need as i would have become, then, a visionary precursor !
-----------------------------
From: "Rice, Bernie"
If I were supreme dictator... 1. I'd Issue Year-2000 bonds. Lots of 'em. Redeemable when government computer (non-Y2K compliant) reaches 2000 AD (1999,1900,1901...)
2. Simplify things and decree AD 2000 shall be The Year of Rice One. (Well, Rice Zero, I suppose.)
3. Avoid holiday travel in year-end 1999. -----------------------------
From: "Hughes, Rich"
If I were Supreme Dictator/President Clinton for a day, what would I tell the world about the Year2000 problem? I would:
1.) Tell the CIO's/CEO's of all american companies that this Year2000 "problem" is a fabrication by some opportunistic consulting companies and that they really have nothing to worry about. If they haven't started by January 1998, let them die (their company) with dignity, don't point out their mismanagement.
2.) Tell the world the truth, the US Federal Government has been treating this so lightly that many of the agencies are going to be so screwed up that they are going to have to hire 100,000's of thousands additional do-nothings at exorbitant salaries and that the average citizen is going to pay an additional $10,000 per year in income tax due to the poor planning by the government managers.
3.) Wish the Republican president that follows him the best of luck in straightening out the mess.From: Tfshub@aol.com Date: Sat, 25 Oct 1997 10:48:10 -0400 (EDT) To: pdejager@year2000.com Subject: if I were supreme dictator
I would announce a press release that welfare checks would be cut off and ask everyone to write to their representative and threaten to not elect them again if the problem was not solved. This would get the problem fixed in short order
i would change the calendar so the problem would not happen we could just add another month to get us through the swearing in of the new president
-----------------------------
From: Norbert Fassotte
I would simply shoot everyone who has a Y2K-problem.
A problem is only a problem if you make it a problem. So if I shoot everyone who detects something and makes it a problem, I don't have a problem. -----------------------------
From: mathew_hennessy
...I'd remove any and all enforcement efforts towards Y2k compliance. I'd then buy up lots of precious metals, flee to the Bahamas, and watch gold prices spike above $1000/oz while the financial markets melt.
Just a touch of fantasy before Halloween.. -----------------------------
From: Rob Janes
If I were Dictator I would tell people to start at least 5 years ago on the Year 2000 problem.
I used that approach and all the applications I am responsible for are in good shape. It's a lot of fun watching people going into panic mode now over the problem.
-----------------------------
From: harold.carruther
1) Proclaim the every CEO must personally renovate and implement at least 1,000,000 lines of COBOL code per year or be sentenced to death by being folded, spindled, and mutilated like a Hollerith card
then
2) Proclaim Bill Gates to be the official CEO for the remainder of the world he doesn't already control
then
3) Double the annual quota -----------------------------
From: Conor Brankin
If I were dictator I would announce that the year 2000 was a virtual concept, and that time shall revert to the year 1900, right after the year 1999.
This would give the developers another 100 years to get it sorted out. After all, we change an hour twice a year, why not a century one a millenium. -----------------------------
That's all folks... Hope you enjoyed them...
Have fun! Peter de Jager
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