Journal, Tor Mirrors

[Undescribed Horrific Abuse, One Victim & Survivor of Many]

It's 10 AM on July 23, 2023, and I am downloading tor browser 12.5.1
at 30 KB/s from a mirror.

Here are some tor mirrors:
https://tor.ybti.net/
https://tor.eprci.net/
https://tor.zilog.es/

Today I was lucky enough to stumble on some feelings of meaning or
sacredness while driving, and I drove by a roadkill deer. I'm parked
near where I saw it, now.

As I mention every moment, I've experienced strong political influence
to build alternate behaviors in me counter to my own views. I believe
in animal rights -- I see animals as sentient. But my
genocide-inducing alternate identity does not. It's very very very
hard to give respect to animals by the road.

I used to give tobacco when I saw a dead animal, and give it a
personal ritual of mourning.

Somehow, seeing the large dead deer, while recently having held
meaningful thoughts, I was able to engage these ideas again.

I thought of [handling inhibs :/]